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Messages - Tony Crisp

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Dream Interpretation / Re: Is she seeing death everywhere - From Comments
« on: December 14, 2017, 10:41:33 AM »
Ashley – Well, it is interesting to meet someone who can recognise that they are in a different dimension of experience while dreaming – you can’t be hurt.

Your dream appears to me to be about you entering the realm of the dead – which is the same realm of dreams. But you are facing, again with the wonderful understanding that although the wind, the bloodshot eyes and the creepy environment, you seem to maintain the stance of the observer, and you appear not to be carried away into the deathly emotions of it. To be able to do that means you have a lot of inner experience and have mastered some aspects of your life.

But in doing so you have been able to meet your own childhood fears, the fears that haunted you as a five year old; but I am guessing that the hard times, the night and wind, the fear of the images you were presented with, you faced with angry courage that you must have carried from the past, and so you arrived at the mastery you have of the fears that still haunt most people.

Many people boast how they can control their dreams by changing the scary bits to things that are not fearful. That is a way of avoiding the message of their dream. But you did something much more powerful, you change yourself by not feeling fear of the threatening metal creatures, and that changed the whole dream; another masterful act.

So, traveller, thank you for sharing such an interesting dream.


Dream Interpretation / Is she seeing death everywhere - From Comments
« on: December 14, 2017, 10:40:42 AM »
Ashley Castaneda

My dream started at my grandmother’s house, she’s been dead for a while but in this dream she is alive. It was dark windy and cold outside and there was something unsettling lurking about to where I couldn’t fall asleep. I step outside with an oil lamp fighting the wind and see a little girl in a white dress angry facing the skies, her eyes were blood red. I had to yell over the blows for her to hear me and asked what she was doing out here? She faced me and looked towards the top of the house, then every other direction with fear in her face. I then asked is she seeing death everywhere.

She nods yes, she’s only around 5. I take her hand and night turns to day and the winds are gone. Her eyes are still red only now she is calm. I look behind me to see the house and what she was seeing. I saw many men hung from trees and atop a barn and the house. Not just by rope but by stakes or branches through the bodies. She was scared so I knew I had to get her someplace safe. We step to cross a road in the old town, to my left were 2 bulls and rams made of solid metal pounding their hooves and clanking their horns as dust kicks up around them. I knew they were going to see us but it was the only way, to cross the road. We took more steps and the ground begins to rumble, they begin to charge and I realize I’m dreaming. I told my dream self that it was okay, you can cross the street and you won’t die if they hit you because it’s not real. Let’s see if we can cross the road to save her. We have to try. I felt us walk with our eyes closed and the bulls along with other horned animals brushed against us as they charged towards other people and this gas station on the side. We weren’t hit. We made it across and stood on some green grass with a small old clay/stone church behind us. Safe.

Dream Interpretation / Re: Sleep paralysis and further
« on: December 14, 2017, 10:38:18 AM »
Thanks Kate.

I want to remind you - Despite our schooling and reading, there is so much still to learn about our own miracle of Life.


Dream Interpretation / Re: Then I drowned - From Comments
« on: December 13, 2017, 01:57:06 PM »
Emily – The disaster coming was the feelings you are trying to work out about your boyfriend. The dream paints an awful picture of you being left in the lurch by him – leaving you to drown.

That might be so, but dreams often are just showing what you feel is happening, but when you think about a lover, a friend or a person you know, you are only taking in your thoughts, impressions and feelings about them. So many people do not realise that they have an inner person equally as powerful as the external person you know. You have taken in millions of bits of memory, lessons learnt, life experiences along with all the feelings or problems met by meeting or living with them, and they change you and make you the person you are. The memories and experience we gather unconsciously change us and are not lost. It is part of you and is symbolised in dreams as a person or event. Such an inner person can appear in dreams because you still carry the memories or impressions of them, and so they influenced what you hold within you.

But your dream shows you ‘going under’ emotionally, which is bad news. If that is so you are caught in a bad position, largely because we are born as mammals, and mammals are prone to react with immense emotions when any threatening situation occurs. But as human mammals we are in an even worse situation, because wild mammals quickly lose their intense reaction, but as humans we hold on to it for ages because we think about it, which triggers the awful emotions again and again and again. Please read http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/avoiding-being-my-own-victim/


Dream Interpretation / Then I drowned - From Comments
« on: December 13, 2017, 01:55:31 PM »

I recently had this dream and I really cant shake it off. I’ve been thinking about what it means and what to do with that meaning.

In this dream my family, boyfriend and I were having dinner. We all knew a dustater was coming, but we didn’t know what yet. Moments later there was a knock on the door. It was an officer telling us to evacuate as soon as possible because a flood was coming. we all rushed out of the house and started walking to the end of the block. it wasn’t till we reached the end that I realized i had forgotten my phone and it was necessary for me to have it because i needed to tell my friend the flood was near and she needed to leave immediately. my boyfriend voluntary said he’s get it because he was a fast runner. As we were waiting we saw the flood come our way. My boyfriend hadn’t returned and i was extremely worried because i knew i was going to die. mainly because i couldn’t swim. i knew my time was up, and all i wanted was to die with him, but he was nowhere near. the flood took me and my family wasn’t near me anymore either. i was alone and then my location changed and i was in a big solid box filled with water. I was unable to survive because there were no air hole or even a little are above with air. it was completely filled with water,but i wasn’t alone. I was with 3 other spread out people. And that’s when i saw my boyfriend again. I tried to reach out to him and call him but i couldn’t because he was too far for me to reach. I wasn’t sure if he saw me or chose to ignore me but he swam past me and i had drowned.

General Discussion / Re: felt like reading a poem... and here a dream again
« on: December 13, 2017, 01:49:32 PM »
Monica – The many experiences, well I have a list. But not yet all of them in http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/features-found-on-site/

I guess we hide so much of ourselves; even what was said in my personal experience, was only part of the story. For such stories are about love and anger that goes back to long past experiences – love and anger on both sides. And in this life we experiences the consequences of it.

As an example of this, some years ago life events led me to face a very painful experience. My wife was living abroad for a while and I did not know when she was coming back. This triggered the release in me of a terror I had kept buried since the age of three. At that time my mother, at the doctor’s suggestion, had sent me away to a convalescent hospital because my health was poor. Unfortunately, because my grandmother had been my prime carer, and had died before I had reached the age of two, I had already experienced great loss. This had left me open to the fear of abandonment. Being at the hospital released this terror that I had been abandoned.
Meeting that terror again in my late 40s was almost more than I could bear. Although the feeling was originally connected with my mother, as usually happens, whoever we love becomes the target for such fears. In meeting these awful feelings, I traced the origin of them back to the events mentioned. But the terrific anger I felt to my mother at exposing me to such unbearable emotions, also spilled over onto my wife.

The anger did not abate and it became obvious that unless I could forgive my mother, I would ruin my marriage with my anger.

It was difficult to find this forgiveness because I felt that what my mother had done was unforgivable. Of course none of this was neatly rational. The feelings were burning beyond reason, and could not be rationalised away. But I could not ignore the fact that this was not, in the end, about my mother, but about myself. My continued anger was ruining my life. So for my own sake I had to sincerely forgive my mother. This was not a fast change, and it was not easy. But it did release me from the crippling effects of the anger. And some effects of non-forgiveness in these situations are quite subtle. One might, for instance, avoid success in one’s life so that those close to you could never feel the pleasure or relaxation of that.

However, forgiveness sometimes has a much more profound significance. I believe that our primal life difficulties, such as mine connected with abandonment, actually have their roots in the long past. It may be easy for us to recognise that my terror can be traced back to the events mentioned in this lifetime. From this we can say, “Yes, the fears he faced as an adult were caused by the loss of his grandmother. And his mother’s decision to put him in the hospital restimulated that fear.”

However, if we can agree that we can trace things back to causative events, why can’t we also say, the original events also had causes? For instance, my mother did other things later in my life to deepen my terror of abandonment. Why?

From the viewpoint of modern genetics, it is understandable that a present day sickness in an individual’s life may be the result of events from generations ago. We understand that the gene pool, from which our own physical body arises, has had negative and positive features added to it over tens of thousands of years. Therefore our present physical, and to some extent psychological, situation, arises out of events in the long past. If we can understand this, then we might also understand and accept that besides a gene pool, there is also a behavioural pool out of which a great deal of human behaviour arises. This is particularly evident in comparing different cultures where certain types of behaviour are passed on for thousands of years.

Some people think of this in terms of past lives. But we can also think of it simply as past events that influence our present life experience as causative factors. So, because it is easier to explain, I will create a scenario using the imagery of past lives.

Supposing in the far past I had hurt and abandoned a child. Supposing the child I had hurt in that previous lifetime is my mother in this lifetime, and she has never forgiven me for what I did. In other words, the actions generated by the past hurt are causative factors, are active and alive in the life of my mother, and are therefore influencing her. In this present life, my mother is in a position of power, and I am the vulnerable child now. So, from whatever it was in her deep unconscious that influenced her actions, she still wishes to hurt me, and did so several times. Actually that was created out of memories.

How far do we have to go back?

And then, in prayer I asked why this lifelong misery had been my lot. I experienced the immediate impression that I had myself betrayed someone’s love in the past. When I asked the question who, the memory and meaning came to me, my mother walking me home prior to telling me she was going to put me in an orphanage. She said, “You hurt me. Now I am going to hurt you.”

I feel as if she was telling me of my fate, and that I had indeed deeply hurt her in the distant past – past life. As her child I was the vulnerable one, and it was my turn to feel pain. My God, what a journey! God forgive me. God forgive my mother. I saw that true forgiveness ends this terrible cycle of pain and vengeance.


Aloha Chelsea – Or from my part of the world, “Dda i gwrdd â chi”. I live in Wales, the Celts.

I would not have been able to answer your question of why you have not been remembering your dreams if it were not for a similar year long experience of my own. For a whole year I couldn’t break through, until one day I asked myself the question, “Why am I stuck”? The answer from within was, “If you know this the answer may well break up your marriage.” I did want to know and the knowing led to me breaking up my marriage.

So I am guessing that, as you said you have been, “used to have very spiritual dreams and feel I connected with my guides but it has been so silent.” In other words you are not letting your dreams do their work of clearing out the rubbish and nightmares you are not facing.

People tend to believe that the spiritual path is all light and beauty but the truth is a seed does not suddenly appear, for no plant or tree grows from a dead seed, and each living seed carries within it all the past gathered from all its forebears. So, the seed in your mother’s womb is as old, and even older than human kind, and you carry that wisdom in you.

 A seed is a return to the source of life and it/our beginnings under the sun. Consciousness on our planet started in the slime of creation, the slime we return to, to procreate. And from that slime which is a vehicle for our seed to exist in, our awareness goes through the whole process of evolution, the dividing of cells, the forming of structure and organs, the creation of a creature with gills, and on to a human type form ready to breathe air, carrying our seed onwards.

So you, as the sum total of life through many earthly existences, have much of the past to deal with. A cleansing process is the next step. The ‘spiritual’ experiences were to help the ego/personality gain confidence, now the real work can begin. See http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/opening-to-life/  - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/integration-meeting-oneself/

General Discussion / Re: felt like reading a poem... and here a dream again
« on: December 11, 2017, 11:14:02 AM »
Thanks Monica – That was written in October 1973, but I only recently came across it again. It was during a session of LifeStream – maybe it explains also something about our speech centre/throat chakra.

“The sounds were just a wordless song going up the scale, becoming more and more positive and powerful. After some minutes, eventually I word came out - “You”. This was repeated, in song, and became, “You know.” This also was repeated tunefully several times, and then suddenly led to, “You know, I don’t know.”

Each new phrase was repeated over and over before the next few words arose. So, a song, and then a longer piece arose. At some point in the song, which went on for some time, I became quite emotional, but not intensely.

As the song ended I was bent up with emotion, for I had stood up as the song got underway. It might be better to say the emotion ended the song, for at this point it became intense. It was so intense, no crying could occur. My mouth was fixed open as happened on October 9th 1973. The internal struggle was enormous, like being hit in the solar plexus and trying to breathe. A tremendous emotion was trying to express, but was stuck in the rigid mouth and body. Gradually, drying, croaking sounds emerged from my throat. They were sounds of extreme emotion and emotional pain, incapable of expression. These sounds developed into dry sobs, my body half crouched and shaking with despair. My right-hand went to my face, then my mouth. My left hand held near or on my genitals. Looking back I believe this showed the genital and oral pain being felt. Then the block burst, and the weeping poured out. My right-hand was now pushed into my mouth - all the fingers were in my mouth. Tears and saliva and mucus from the nose ran down my face, and at last the force of the emotions emerged. I was calling out, “No mummy. No mummy. Mummy, mummy, mummy!” I believe it was the re-experiencing of the time my mother told me she was going to put me in a home.


Dream Interpretation / Re: Sleep paralysis and further
« on: December 11, 2017, 10:19:19 AM »
KateUK - In the state you were in - strung between two very different dimensions of experience, almost anything is possible. The throat chakra is often a point of great tensions and so almost a fight; partly because when we let it go we really let go in a way our conscious personality is not used to.

To gain insight into the process I suggest reading http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/lifes-little-secrets/ and http://dreamhawk.com/body-and-mind/peoples-experiences-of-lifestream/

It might also add something to read http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/dimensions-of-human-experience/ and maybe http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/going-beyond/

Despite our schooling and reading, there is so much still to learn about our own miracle of Life.


Dream Interpretation / Re: front teeth chopped
« on: December 10, 2017, 12:27:50 PM »
Monica – It is the feelings in your dream that are important and help create the images we use in our dreams.

In our waking life a feeling slips by hardly noticed, but reaches our inner life like a bombshell causing such worrying dreams. Here is an example of it I dreamt in December 1966.

Example: I looked around for a stone to throw into the water for my dog Tramp to swim after, but could only find a tiny piece of bark. I threw it in, wondering in fact, whether Tramp would follow it – he leapt in. When the bark hit the water it looked as if the water had been hit by a bomb. The exploded impact area then turned into a whirlpool. Tramp was dragged beneath the surface by the current.

Your fear is I guess about ageing, but we often take it to mean we will lose our youthful looks, and maybe our teeth. But underneath all those feelings about our personality lies the fear of death.

Each of us are immersed in a ‘river’ of constant change. If you think about it you have been carried, pushed, impelled by this current as you were moved through babyhood, childhood, teenage and adulthood. And as we passed through these changes we died to our old self in order to change to the new. It is the current of Life. This current then carries us on through old age and through the gates of death. All the time we are faced by decisions, and each decision directs us on a different path, helping to create our future. And this is a force of growth and change; and is fought like hell by many as we are afraid of such changes, especially getting old and facing death.

I don’t know if what I want to say makes any difference to you, but personally I see the best way is to actually look in the mirror while awake and say to yourself, “Okay, I will get old and lose my good looks and maybe some teeth. That is what comes from living in a body that constantly changes and ages from the moment of birth. That is awful only if you are convinced that you are only your body. If that is so, take time to realise that you are the miracle of Life – the latest version of an ancient process. None of us was made from scratch. Every human being develops from the fusion of two cells, an egg and a sperm, that are the descendants of other cells. The lineage of cells that joins one generation to the next — called the germline — is, in a sense, immortal."

Sentience, awareness, consciousness is, as I see it, the very basis of being. The body is like a mushroom, which has been pushed up from a massive mycelium, a mass of threadlike growth underground. A 2,400-acre [970-hectare] site in eastern Oregon had a contiguous growth of mycelium before logging roads cut through it. Estimated at 1,665 football fields in size and 2,200 years old. The mycelium puts up a mushroom or toadstool to procreate. So it is a good analogy of human life which extrudes a body to procreate and to gather the experience we can only get through bodily life – and especially to experience limitations and its lessons and thereby develop and explore our massive potential. See http://dreamhawk.com/inner-life/jesse-watkins-experience-of-enlightenment/ 

This Sentient self defines its own realm by feeding upon the higher experiences and realisations of the personality, through repeated earth lives. These past lives are not remembered easily because the new person that developed in the new body had no past connections because it has a new brain. The soul or personality is built from the local memories stored in the new brain. So memories of the past can only be attained by a deep awareness of the spirit. See http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/opening-to-life/


Dream Interpretation / Re: Sleep paralysis and further
« on: December 10, 2017, 11:22:39 AM »
Dear Kate – I will share my feelings – that you are fighting your greatest healer. But let me explain.

Waking consciousness exists as a tiny part of the total being it manifests in. Maybe I am exaggerating, but in its tiny room it has a few buttons it presses and the voluntary muscles move. There are a few screens which, through some of the body senses give a view of a tiny range of the phenomena of the universe. The rest of our being, the remainder of the universe, we give the cover-all name of unconsciousness. It simply means – we are not aware of it. It is a bit like having a web camera stuck in a certain place, and that is all you can see through it – yet there is the whole wide web to explore. But when we start to see beyond our webcam we often get scared.

Many people as their awareness reaches beyond what they feel is their normal self feel scared. Such resistances cause us to create awful dreams and fears as a means of avoiding our own inner world and its wonders. We feel that we will be swallowed up and we will die. It is important to say that when we meet the experience of powerlessness through becoming aware of the hugeness of your Life, which we are usually unaware if, it feels like something alien or attacking them, and it is a shock.

In life and sleep we have two powerful actions working in us. The first is our waking experience based on having a body, its limitations, vulnerabilities and a particular gender. Our second is the power that gave us life and continues to express as spontaneous movement in dreams, in our breathing and heartbeat – our Life. This I have given the description as the Life Will.

While we sleep our conscious self is largely or totally unconscious, and while we sleep and dream our voluntary muscles are paralysed – therefore another will or motivating force moves our body. So we have a Conscious Will, and what I will call a Life Will. The first one we have experience of as we can move our arm or speak in everyday activities; but the second will takes over when we sleep.

This Life will can move us to speak, to move our body, and in fact do things that we cannot do with our Conscious Will, all that while we sleep and dream. For simplicity I have called this experience, of what is actually waking lucid dreaming, see http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/the-waking-lucid-dream/

The Life Will is usually blocked in its ability to express in waking consciousness its ability to move our body, our voice and all our energy functions, by a part of the brain the pons. It does this to protect us from injuring ourselves while sleeping. But we can, if we overcome our fears, allow it to express while awake. Links to hpw this can happen can be seen in The Waking Lucid Dream.

The Life Will is the self regulating – homeostatic – function that all the time keeps us alive. But because we feel we must always be in control we fight any spontaneous action, and so put ourselves at risk. See http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/lifes-little-secrets/ - http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/opening-to-life/

You have been experiencing the Life Will, often called the spiritual force trying to move you toward inner growth. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/growth-of-something/


Anonymous – You appear to be in the process of waking up to what dreams are and what their possibilities are. But you have only taken small steps and need more understanding.

“I realised I could possibly have a nightmare.” That was a misconception based on waking fears, for whenever we dream its images are not like real life, because a dream is nothing like outer life where things could hurt you, but is an image like on a cinema screen that even if a gun is pointed at you and fired it can do no damage – except if you run in fear. For all the things that scare you are simply your own fears projected onto the screen of your sleeping mind.

A little Kuwaiti boy survived the Iraqi invasion of his country and was living without his father, a prisoner of war. But a recurring nightmare, of Saddam Hussein stabbing his brother to death, was prolonging the trauma.

One night he had a different dream: This time he carried the knife, becoming a hero who kills his nemesis. The emotional weight he carried disappeared. Altering recurring nightmares may hold a key to recovery for many victims of trauma, says Dr. Deidre Barrett, a professor of behavioral medicine and hypnotherapy at Harvard Medical School. Barrett spent a month in Kuwait City after the Gulf War training other therapists to treat post-traumatic stress disorder.  She says, “Just changing something in the dream gives people such a sense of mastery in controlling things.” See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/masters-of-nightmares/ - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/secrets-power-dreaming/

Because you were slightly aware it enabled you to change your dream to a non threatening situation. But because all the people, animals, places you see in your dreams, are simply your own feelings, fears, hopes and wonder projected onto the screen of your sleeping mind as images, it was silly to avoid facing your own fears, because facing them would transform your life.

Also controlling your mind is a sign that you are frightened of your own self. Perhaps see http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/lifes-little-secrets/ - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/integration-meeting-oneself/


Dream Interpretation / I could possibly have a nightmare - From Comments
« on: December 08, 2017, 11:38:10 AM »

I had a dream during an afternoon nap that I was on a green field, someone walked past who offended me and my life, so I defended it by telling them about my personal achievements that make me great. Then I lay down on this green lawn and suddenly realised that I am dreaming and I am inside my mind then I thought very quickly of what to think of because I realised I could possibly have a nightmare within it, so I thought of being in water. I closed my eyes and I was inside water, thinking of nothing, but just listening to the sound of water which was slightly uncomfortable, but very refreshing and relaxing because the tiiiiiny discomfort kept me focused and controlling my mind. Then someone knocked on my door and I had to wake up, so I did.

What could that experience mean for me?

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