Funeral

[janinalittlewolf]

My mother died in 1994 - we weren't close but I nursed her toward the end of her illness - we had become closer as she drew nearer to death I suppose.
Her funeral came and went - I have a few vivid memories from the day but they are only vivid if I work on recall.  My father had already died and by 2000 the last of my immediate family had passed away.

Yesterday I dreamt of the entire funeral service for my mother - from the chapel and the coffin being walked in through to after the service and discussions with other family and the few friends that were present.  From memory I would say I dreamt it as though I was running a film back - it all seemed the same even my feelings - conversations had were also the same - exactly the same - I woke myself from the dream in tears.  I don't miss her, I didn't love her particularly - why am I dreaming this now?

[Tony Crisp]

JANINALITTLEWOLF - It is usually because there is so much we do not know about ourselves consciously. The tears are a bit like the string that Theseus went into the labyrinth, laying out to find his way, and killed the Minotaur.

But in your case you need to follow the string of your emotions, then you will find enormous amounts of you were hidden. But of course you need to not be afraid of feeling deeply. If you could sit with someone sympathetic and allow your feelings and say whatever came spontaneously perhaps you would find a treasure within you. You do not need to think or analyse, but just mention whatever is brought up.

Tony