red business suit and killing

[shananerbananer]

Hello! My name is Shannen and I am new at this forum. Main reason why I joined this forum is that I had a very weird dream the other night and it kind of bothers me. My dream started about me walking in large conference room with full of people that was dressed in business suits. When i walked through the door people are chatting and I decided to walk right in the middle towards the front where the podium is at. I was wearing an all red business suit and red heels. As I walk, I was making a ticking sound with my heels that grabbed everybody's attention. It was a pretty long walk and everybody was looking at me. I remember feeling very powerful and confident at that moment and liking every attention that I get from them almost feeling like "yeah! its me stare all you want, envy me cause im better than all of you".

In my dream I was a respected and famous lawyer and all of the people that was in the conference room are all lawyers too and my subordinates. It turns out that I was there to tell them that the rumor of me killing someone was not true even though I myself knew that I killed "the guy".

The next scene from my dream was an elevator door opening and inside was a girl who does not look like me but in my dream supposedly it was me and beside her was guy that is dead and bleeding. I didn't saw how he was killed but i knew that I killed him with a gun and the fact that I was the one who did it. The elevator door closes and goes down to the next floor when there was a guy who heard a loud bang from the gun when supposedly i shoot the guy again. He was thinking it must be nothing when the elevator door opens again and he saw me inside with the dead guy. Instead of telling on me, he actually helped me cover the crime. It didn't show how he helped me but I remember after cleaning the crime scene that I was spreading almost playing with it, the guy's blood inside the elevator floor using my foot. There was even a part where i felt that all  of the people around me truly believe that I was the one who killed the guy but nobody can prove it since I was a really good lawyer and even all the evidence pointed at me I have the perfect excuse for them.   

This dream was very bothering to me because of the fact that I killed someone in that dream and the colors was so clear especially the red heels and business suit and the scene where I was in the elevator. I also like the feeling that I felt while i was walking in the middle of the conference room. The feeling of having so much power  and being confident and that I was walking with my head up high and people being envy at me because I was capable, smart and everything that I wanted to be. And that it was okay even if I killed someone as long as people worship me. I remember none of the people in my dream was someone that i knew. I though during the dream that the guy helped me was Asian and that i knew him but after waking up and realizing all of it I actually do not know him. I hope you can help me with this very weird dream. Thank you so much.

[Tony Crisp]

Shannen – You need to realise that dreams have a very different view of murder than in waking life. Murder in our inner world of dreams can be caused by ‘killing’ out love, by repressing our natural urges, or by wishing someone out of your life or feelings of anger.

The murder took place when you were a young girl and it was a delight for you. Also the people in your dream are nearly always about someone they know or a strange new person or situation they automatically believe the dream is about that person, situation or animal. But when we think of our friend or partner our thoughts are not them – just our thoughts and feelings about them. So dream images are ways of communicating via our associations not actual things or people. In the world of dreams our most intimate fears and longings are given an exterior life of their own in the form of the people, objects and places of our dream.

So what do your associations say about the Asian guy, or the dead body, for they are full of information if you explore them. You can do this by using http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson

The dream is ‘bothering’ you because dreams are ways of helping you to become more aware of yourself – not a punishment or horror film.

Example: I felt really guilty and connected with the body, as if I had been part of his murder, and was wondering frantically what I could do to hide or get rid of the body. Part of the problem was that pulling it out risked being seen with it.

In ‘being’ the body in the dream the man said, “But it wasn’t until I got into the role of the dead body that any depth of feelings emerged.  Almost as soon as I was in the role of the dead body I began to think about and feel things connected with the way I had killed my sexuality as a teenager.  Gradually these feelings deepened and I was describing my feeling hatred in regard to sexuality and how the masses were pulled along by their genitals into some sort of conformity and performance.  I felt anger and loathing for what I felt at the time were the cattle human beings were. At the time I despised and hated them. I also felt repugnance at the way people talked about sex or appeared to enjoy it.  It has to be understood that in that period in history in the UK, most of sex was depicted in terms of smut, dirt, animal desire, hidden pornography, or loveless fucking. I wept deeply, at times hardly able to breathe, with the pain of seeing what I had done to myself.  I said sorry over and over.  I saw that I need not have killed my love and sexuality, but could have expressed it in a tender and loving way.

As you can see form the example, the man felt in his dream, “I had been part of his murder, and was wondering frantically what I could do to hide or get rid of the body. Part of the problem was that pulling it out risked being seen with it.”

But on exploring his associations he realised the dream was a way of transforming his anger and pain into tender and loving feelings.

Your head held high, your red shoes and clothes and your feelings of power were ways that you have used to cover up your other feelings of murderousness. But there is a middle way that does not to wallow either in guilt or superiority, but is the way of the razors edge which depict any behaviour or attitudes that are one-sidedness and lead us to imbalance within us. But at the same time it is not about being perfect or a saint, but a balanced and whole human being with very wide choices. Walking it we balance between the opposites facing us.

Tony