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Author Topic: My friend murders me  (Read 4254 times)

Omega

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My friend murders me
« on: October 04, 2017, 10:56:12 AM »
A few months ago I met up with an old best friend. I shared some of my story and learned of his own difficulties. I was disappointed and hurt he didn't reach out more afterwards and did his usual of hiding in work. Still I could see he is under more emotional pressure than he may realise, and is struggling under the pressure men are put to always be strong, and though I've been through hell im definitely on the healing path.

Last night I dreamt we were both looking over a bridge high over a river into the water. He was testing a rope to see would it reach. I said it's too thin to climb up. Then he encouraged me to dive into the water, I hesitated but agreed, then he was right behind me diving in too. I thought he's too close this could be dangerous but It was happening so quickly. He dived right behind me, as in almost holding me, then when we were under water I realised he was holding me and he was drowning me. I was trying to understand why he would do this, Im so surprised and confused and then I die. I woke from this, shocked and sad.

(In being the thing I just get anger and jealousy as him.  For me the overwhelming emotion is betrayal and grief)
« Last Edit: October 04, 2017, 12:59:59 PM by Omega »

Tony Crisp

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Re: My friend murders me
« Reply #1 on: October 09, 2017, 10:40:13 AM »
Omega – First, I am sorry it took ages to answer.

A bridge can depict connection between yourself and another person, a relationship, a link between self and opportunity, yourself and change in your life and relationship. Being high up shows that you have a good view, not too entangled in everyday life.

You friend is not often your actual friend, but an image you create out of your feelings and thoughts you experience about him. Your feelings about the rope may reflect what happened between you previously, the lack of strength in the connection.

Diving into the river suggest you are ready to face what life brings - the current, the struggles, other people who may be in the river with you. But you experienced the fear that if the person holds on to you it will lead to drowning.

In dreams you cannot drown or die, but of course you dream is illustrating something else. But the healing path you are on eventually leads to becoming more independent of others influence on us. But such independence does not mean you are absolutely impersonal otherwise your sight is coloured. For you can exist in the great river of life experience without being drowned in it or swept away. Hard lessons but possible.

 (In being the thing I just get anger and jealousy as him. For me the overwhelming emotion is betrayal and grief)

These show that in fact you were caught in the huge current in which as humans we are swept along by. Slowly, as you are on the “healing path” things drop away. For you do not have to fight and struggle with them, for real growth ripens the fruits of yourself, and when ripe they drop away.

You have learned the lesson of ‘being’ the images of your dream, so now you can add another one. You asked and received a response, which allows you to gain a response with questions you ask. For example you could ask, “Okay so I felt anger, jealousy, betrayal and grief, but what is the best way to deal with them?” Or any question you wish to explore.

Tony

Omega

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Re: My friend murders me
« Reply #2 on: October 11, 2017, 07:10:09 PM »
Thank you Tony, not at all, I'm always grateful for any answer at any speed. And thanks for my new lesson, I like it a lot.

I will say that the specific fear I felt, was not that him holding me or being close caused my drowning, but that in the dream he seemed to have coolly planned my death.

It was an awful moment feeling his hands around me, keeping himself alive and drowning me. The knowledge he had that much hate in him and towards me.

I don't think it's specifically about this friend, but my dream emotions and experience were strong and clear.

 I may be infinite consciousness, but the dream shows me my current, or this life's level of connection/disconnection to that power, I have often been at the mercy of those with more power in this domain than I.

Tony Crisp

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Re: My friend murders me
« Reply #3 on: October 12, 2017, 08:50:17 AM »
Hi Omega - But considering most every charracter in your dreams is a part - not always a recongised part - of you. So who is  it planning your death - and did you explore him to find out what his motives were?

I have found again and again that the most threatening dream characters are actually trying to break through our fearful defences to help to take the next step.

"Had a nightmare that I was by myself, with a young boy, in a rather stark, lonely house. I called it Bleak House. There was something about. While I was in a small room with my boy the “thing” came and tried to get in the door. I was so terrified I put my back against the a wall and pushed the door tight with my feet. My terror was so great though, I felt paralysed and weak, but I just managed to hold the door closed. The fear was awful though, and I tried to call for help, but at first no sound came out. Then a strangled cry emerged, and eventually I screamed out for help. That woke my wife, who woke me."

Exploring my dream, the house is my individual estate, my disposition - like a cliff face, meeting the wind and sea. It is my lonely vigil, my disciplined selfhood, sitting alone seeking the essence, declining to relate to others; not even eating food they leave. I have an image of people coming to me to be near someone. I sit because I question their attitudes in regard to seeking company and other people in their life. 

The threatening “thing” is the fear of bombing that I felt in my childhood during the war. A little while ago in one of the exploring sessions I was crying out to my father to stop the bombing.
 
The “thing” is people I know, it is Life trying to enter my life, and I have been keeping it out through my childhood fears.

Tony
 


« Last Edit: October 12, 2017, 08:54:36 AM by Tony Crisp »