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Author Topic: Inner healing  (Read 183 times)

green tara

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Inner healing
« on: November 03, 2017, 06:37:35 AM »
Hi Tony,
I have been trying to understand this dream for months.I can sense that it's revealing an important message for working with my inner healing and quest for connection with the deeper aspects of my being.

My dream:
At a shoot we are expecting"A" a cinematographer (my infatuation from 20 years ago). He arrives.He is wearing spectacles with a black frame.I have just washed my long hair and wrapped my wet hair in a towel.
We look at each other.His gaze is tender.He pulls me towards him and holds me with his arms around me with my back against him (both of us are facing forward).
It's a very affectionate and intimate embrace in front of everyone.We are standing together like old friends,old lovers.
I am wearing very colorful clothes and my face is glowing.
When I look up at him I am surprised that his gaze is so tender and the embrace has a feeling of ownership,belonging,oneness.It's not a 'meeting-after-a-decade' embrace.He just holds me like I am His.
The shoot is not a great shoot.They are just shooting some add-on material for a foreign film apparently.That's what another man "B" tells me.B is seeing me after a long time and is glad to see me.He looks like a client or client-servicing manager.
I am glad all is good between "A" and me.It's like after all these decades he knows I've changed and grown up.He looks cleaned up and mature too in his spectacles.
He looks young,with black hair like he did 20 years ago when we first met ,not like he would actually look today.
I am not at the shoot at all.I am occupied with other work in another room upstairs but I say I need a loo break so I can go down.I want to see the shoot and "A" and let him know that I am not staying away this time.
I use the toilet downstairs.It's a rustic toilet with unwashed floors but I use it as it's downstairs and it's big and better than the other toilets.Another toilet I went to has all the windows open and it's even more rustic out in a stable-like area and the windows can't be closed so I don't use that one.
I want to be at the shoot because "A" is there.
I am wearing my bright pink track pants and a colorful top and I wonder why I picked these clothes since "A" is seeing me after so long.But he doesn't seem to notice the clothes.He looks at my face.
Later I remove the towel from my hair.My hair is still wet and it feels very sexy.The client-servicing manager sees me and I am hoping that "A" is seeing me.
Somehow "A" and me are not together at the shoot.
My feeling in the dream is that I don't want a repeat of the past where I just feel the attraction but stay away.I want us to be together and I want to have things clear not ambiguous.

The following is my attempt at understanding this dream:
Shoot= Creation/Creating something New
"A" the cinematographer (creator) is my Muse.
My wet hair symbolizes an integration of ideas and emotions.
My Muse and I looking at each other indicates that I am facing myself directly.The tender embrace indicates an integration of aspects of the Muse.
I have a colorful persona (clothes) but my Real self is expressing (face is glowing).
I wear pink pants=feminine is expressing
"He just holds me like I am His" = The Divine is holding me like I am His.I am encircled in the arms of the Divine.
The film is a projection of a foreign film which represents the Unknown.
I meet "B" who represents the limited mind who cannot see beyond what's known. He cannot perceive or receive the foreign (unknown/limitless) film that "A" is creating.
A and I have both matured.
He looks exactly as he did 20 years ago = As he represents my vision and passion as it was back then and at the same time it's matured and grown.
The shoot ( Creative Mind) is downstairs (in the Unconscious) while I am upstairs (conscious mind) doing other work (seeking higher knowledge).
I go down to the loo for releasing unconscious emotions.I am not staying away this time.In choosing a toilet ,I release whatever "rustic" emotions I am willing to yet I am not prepared to be completely exposed.
"A" sees through my colorful Persona and sees the Real me=I am ready to look at my  Real self.
The man (logical mind) is seeing my wet hair .The feeling sexy is the conscious mind becoming aware of deeper emotions.My emotions and logical mind are integrating.
Wet hair (ideas and emotions)=The Logos and Eros integrating.I am hoping my Muse notices it too.I have washed my hair of old beliefs to receive inspiration from him.
However the Muse and me are never at the shoot together.

I am very curious what the dream is pointing out to me. Why are the muse and me not shooting the film together ? What is my relationship with the Muse suggesting and what does the other man reflect about me? There is a polarity between the two men. How do I resolve this conflict ?
Thank you.
« Last Edit: November 09, 2017, 02:14:30 AM by tara »

Tony Crisp

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Re: Inner healing
« Reply #1 on: November 03, 2017, 10:14:40 AM »
Tara – I would suggest you are meeting your other half, your animus. A lot deeper than a muse. Of course it is also a meeting with the divine. Because becoming Whole is your Self and now longer locked in the one sidedness of physical gender. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/archetype-of-the-animus-jungs-view-of-the-male-in-the-female/

It is also worth realising that when you think about a lover, a friend or a person you know, you are only taking in your thoughts, impressions and feelings about them. So many people do not realise that they have an inner person equally as powerful as the external person you know. You have taken in millions of bits of memory, lessons learnt, life experiences along with all the feelings or problems met by meeting or living with them, and they change you and make you the person you are. The memories and experience we gather unconsciously change us and are not lost. It is part of you and is symbolised in dreams as a person or event. Such an inner person can appear in dreams because you still carry the memories or impressions of them, and so they influenced what you hold within you.

That you have also met your sexual as well as your tender love, also you have matured, and all of it says to me that your inner growth has led you toward meeting your whole self.

Remember that all the people, animals, and places you see in your dreams, are simply your own feelings, fears, hopes and wonder projected onto the screen of your sleeping mind as images. How could it be otherwise because you are alone in your own mind - -except that your whole mind – the conscious and the huge unconscious - is the creator in which you have full sensory experience. You are totally involved, with all your emotions and sexual responses. Changes occur and you love, fight, fear, murder or bring to life again the person, who can become an animal, a devil, God or a bodiless voice lost in a sombre countryside. Your experiences are totally real, and you move through heaven and hell, despair and joy, darkness and light. Scenes from your past can be revisited – or totally new experiences can be felt so clearly, you are enriched. That is a dream.

 But perhaps you have not taken time to consider the wonder of your creative process in dreams. Every night you create a new drama. You conjure out of your own being the people, the creatures, and the surroundings of your dream. Then you give life to what you create – not only life but purpose and drama. You are a supreme dramatist, playwright, actor and actress. You are the great Creator – in your dreams. Considering this, have you ever wondered why that enormous creativity does not flow into your waking life? You can see that some people have that creativity and are enriched by it personally and financially. Why not you?

You are also a dual creature, alive in a dual world – male and female, light and dark, waking and sleeping, living and dying, the upstairs and the downstairs, and the apparent conflicts through having dual characters in your dream. What sort of person would you be if you had no doubts or a "B", who represents the limited mind who cannot see beyond what's known?

Yes, you are Everything – wonderful and at times trying!

You are unconsciously God – get used to it.

Tony

green tara

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Re: Inner healing
« Reply #2 on: November 06, 2017, 03:32:53 AM »
Many thanks Tony.
I appreciate how you have presented the duality between A and B.I wasn't getting the duality aspect of it. I hated that there was a 'B' around because all I was yearning for is to be 'A'.
But now the new possibility arises that the two can co-exist and I don't have to resent 'B' so much. (wow I can't believe I used the words hated and resent.I had no idea I felt so strongly).
My whole life I have been seeking 'A' to get away from ' B' . Am I seeking the impossible?
Will ' B' always exist in waking life while 'A' remains Unconscious ?
« Last Edit: November 06, 2017, 06:46:42 AM by Tara »

Tony Crisp

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Re: Inner healing
« Reply #3 on: November 06, 2017, 11:16:04 AM »
Tara - Most of our cultural beliefs are built on the huge conflict and warfare between the 'A' and 'B' side of life and oneself. Most of this is presented in such films as Lord of the Ring, where the Dark side has to conquer and KILL the Light side - and vice versa.

We are also shown films of zombies, werewolves, demons and vampires that have to be fought and killed. Yet my exploration of such creatures has always shown them as parts of myself I had been scared of and so repressed, making them almost lifeless, and trying to climb out of the grave I had pushed them in. See the beginning of http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/integration-meeting-oneself/

Thanks for telling us about, "I hated that there was a 'B' around because all I was yearning for is to be 'A'.
But now the new possibility arises that the two can co-exist and I don't have to resent 'B' so much. (wow I can't believe I used the words hated and resent.I had no idea I felt so strongly).
My whole life I have been seeking 'A' to get away from ' B' . Am I seeking the impossible?
Will ' B' always exist in waking life while 'A' remains Unconscious ?"

My first inkling of it was when I dreamt in 1982 about a huge underground goddess/serpent who was trying to destroy London - the town I lived in.

"My family thought I was crazy because I was trying to tell them about this power and they sent for a doctor. I was very pleased to see him because he was very unbiased, though not believing - nor disbelieving. I explained my experience and feelings. With him there  in the basement of our house I dared to poke at the hole in the floor with a long scaffold pole. The pole was ripped from my grasp by some force below. I had tied the pole to a beam fasted with a chain. The pole ripped part of the beam off. I felt there was enough power to tear down my house if I had used it as an anchor. Then wondering what to do I saw the figure of Christ standing in the basement. Somehow I pulled the Christ and the serpent/woman together and evil was neutralised - but so was the power of Christ. I felt with great strength that it was out of the melding of evil and good that great creativity came."

Tony

« Last Edit: November 06, 2017, 11:31:17 AM by Tony Crisp »

green tara

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Re: Inner healing
« Reply #4 on: November 09, 2017, 01:10:04 PM »
Thank you Tony.
The underground goddess/serpent in your dream made me think of the power of kundalini and the melding with Christ as the divine union of Shiva Shakti.
This sparked off an insight for me that the "A" aspect has always been the Spiritual(including creative,artistic) and the "B" side has been the Materialistic aspect of life.The spiritual and seeking enlightenment was given top priority in my life while the material (daily living,worldly life,making money, herd mentality ) was rejected.
In this dream the "B" is depicted as a client servicing manager and the "A" side as a cinematographer.The war of the material world verses the spiritual/artistic world.

It annoyed me ( when I reflected on the dream much later ) that "the client-servicing manager sees me".I am not clear what his seeing me really symbolizes or why I was annoyed.

I remove the towel from my hair.My hair is still wet and it feels very sexy.The client-servicing manager sees me and I am hoping that "A" is seeing me.
Somehow "A" and me are not together at the shoot.
My feeling in the dream is that I don't want a repeat of the past where I just feel the attraction but stay away.I want us to be together and I want to have things clear not ambiguous.


I have worked intensively on integrating the animus and other hidden parts of myself (that are revealed in dreams , meditation etc ) and I feel this dream is a kind of reassurance to inform me where I am on the journey and how far I have come from where I was twenty years ago.

However this particular aspect still needs to be "seen"...

The client-servicing manager sees me and I am hoping that "A" is seeing me.
"A" has already seen me deeply earlier in the dream.I should be glad that "B" also sees me.
Maybe the dream is suggesting that A and B are melding and I just need to see that clearly? (instead of getting annoyed which is probably an old unconscious pattern).

Thank you.
« Last Edit: November 14, 2017, 03:54:12 AM by green tara »

green tara

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Re: Inner healing
« Reply #5 on: November 10, 2017, 03:18:58 AM »
In the last week I've had dreams that are followups on this same theme.
Dreams:
1.My father looks at a paper which has all my finances written on it. He says you have plenty to take care of and to handle.
A girl I knew in college (a social climber),picks up the paper lying on the table and goes through the detailed figures written on it.She tells me I have a lot.

2.Three men have left money in my name.One of them is my first boyfriend (when I was a teenager).I go to his house at night,between 10 pm-12 am.I see him lying on his bed with his wife sitting on the edge of the bed.I realize it's wrong to invade their privacy and run back down the steep stairs.But I feel he is following me and I call out his name.He is there.I tell him I came for a reason but I've forgotten what it is.He says it's Ok because he was going to contact me anyway to tell me he is giving me 300,000 as well.Earlier two other male friends have also given me 300,000.
I tell my sister I am getting 900,000 from these 3 guys.Maybe I'm meant to take care of it and put it to good use.I take the money quite happily.

3.I see a school friend's mother.(Her parents were always struggling financially and short of cash in the past).Her mother is surprisingly dressed up in very elegant,expensive clothes and jewellery and looks very wealthy.Then her daughter enters the room.Her hair is done up very elegantly and she is also dressed up in tasteful,expensive clothes.I feel she is dressed and done her hairstyle for the first time in a way that actually looks good and suits her.
They are both ready to leave for High Tea with their friends.
I ask my school friend-'Oh you are also joining your mom?' She says Yes.
« Last Edit: November 10, 2017, 05:16:41 AM by tara »

Tony Crisp

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Re: Inner healing
« Reply #6 on: November 10, 2017, 10:52:17 AM »
Tara – Yes, exactly - divine union of Shiva Shakti, Krishna and Radha, Isis and Osiris and many more. Our unconscious is not at all locked into any one belief system but loves them all.

When I explored the dream I felt the woman/serpent was the unrestrained, wild natural self. So often repressed or denied, making us only half alive. It can also been seen as the earth mother which is also the snake. The snake I have come to recognise as an expression of the reptile brain we all have. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/brain-levels-and-dreams/#reptilebrain. This basic part of our brain still deals with fundamental need food, procreation, survival and the fight or flight instinct – i.e. dealing with fear and threat. It also has infinite potential, exactly like kundalini.

A good example of this is the way electricity exists in a house. First, we have the supply of electricity into the house. The wires carrying the supply to the house are not in themselves the electricity. The current is invisible, but it has great potential for good or harm. So we usually deal with it carefully, and have means of controlling it via insulation, fuses and switches. When the electricity is wired into the house, its potential can be expressed in a huge variety of ways. It can manifest as heat, light, and power to move or do things, such as with a drill or vacuum cleaner. It can produce sound or images as with television, and can, via programs for the computer, manifest in almost magical ways, storing and retrieving huge amounts of information and manipulating it.

So the B aspect is also divine, for it is the other polarity of life – darkness and light – matter and anti-matter – for Shakti is no less divine than Shiva.

Your dreams seem to me to be moves toward this balance that can exist between love and lust, and the other opposites.

All the money you received is a sure sign that you are starting to open to your infinite potential and the wonderful gifts that you have, perhaps previously hidden beneath unbalanced belief or performance.

Money in dreams can indicate growth of self value, your potential, energy or personal resources.

Tony