Love - You sound like you are well on the way, and I often put comments not just for you but for the many people who read them.
So, R. D. Laing, the psychiatrist, in describing the search for ones fundamental self said, ‘The Life I am trying to grasp is the me that is trying to grasp it.’
One of the enlightenment sites listed has a heading, ‘What you are looking for is what is looking.’
Enlightenment is not a state of mind you can create or develop. It is something beyond any change, outside of anything you can develop. After all, development suggests change.
The frustrating thing about enlightenment is that the harder one tries to grasp it, the further away from it one gets. The more effort one makes in trying to achieve it, the less one finds of it.
It is the ever present, self existent core of yourself that remains when all else drops away.
So the question should not be can I develop the state of mind that is enlightenment, but how can I realise this fundamental state?
One of the enlightenment experiences someone describes was as follows:
"The many different paths to the one great ocean of Life can be summarised in a simple way because they all have a common factor. It, like dancing or meditating for extended periods, quietens your normal way of thinking and looking at the world. In a meditation seminar I attended that lasted for several days I observed this with great clarity. After three days of meditation I saw my thinking mind faint. It could no longer sustain the continued concentrated pursuit of the question we were asking. In the moment of my rational thinking mind fainting there was an experience of divine Life knowing itself as this man people call B. In that state I knew connection with all the people around me, and the birds, trees and earth. For they and I shared the same spirit. I had arrived home at the source of things. I felt I was in the Garden of Eden, and that we had never left it. That experience, as ephemeral as it may sound, has given me something that strengthened me to pass through big life changes, and travel joyfully into old age."
So it is about YOU without all the effort and thinking or struggle to 'get there'. The question the man was pursuing which led to his mind fainting was, "Who are you?'
Tony
