Welcome, Guest. Please login or register.

Author Topic: A Trip Into Being Worthless  (Read 3740 times)

Tony Crisp

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3419
    • View Profile
    • Dreamhawk.com
A Trip Into Being Worthless
« on: January 18, 2019, 10:31:18 AM »
I was in a coach with several people, Sara, Tony someone who was cutting out model airplanes from green metal, others in the background. We were on a long journey to Woolacombe in North Devon. When I spoke as the coach I was able to transport myself and others to places they wanted to go, I had lots of space inside me, and comfortable places to be for people.

I then spoke as the green metal that was being cut and moulded into shapes of airplanes and a helicopter , as the helicopter I could rise above the ground of the coach and get an over view of what was going on.
The metal making represented both my parents, who had passed onto as my amazing strength, which they had learnt from their life experiences. My mother had grown up from the age of 11 years in an orphanage seemed to be able to do anything without asking for help; she worked full time  as a cook would  make clothes, bake wedding cakes for neighbours , gardening, run the house, without washing machine or fridge. I was told that she was a well read woman though I never saw this; she must have done this between shifts at work.

My father was like a rock, not so noticeable in his skills but I sense that he could handle life. Tony was also a part of me that had strength to look within myself for knowledge. The helicopter could also go within not just above, because then it connects with the inner world. And Sara was another part of me who had to find the strength to cope with what life brought along, in a way not allowing her emotions to drive her.

Woolacombe was a place of security, and of becoming a parent.

Sara’s mum who was at Woolacombe was a difficult part for me to own, In fact I said, “I Can’t face this.” But as I allowed myself to become her I felt no sense of worth, as if I wanted to curl up and retreat, but staying with this dreadful feeling, Tony asked if I could find something good within myself and what name I could give her as that part of myself. I gave her the name Beryl and I suddenly had a shift and burst of emotions, feeling the wonder of myself having a mothers love. From that I experienced a beautiful feeling of a flower opening, such a shift of feeling, with the petals reaching out, unfolding in a natural way, then a sense of being a seed in my belly and a larger flower coming out from my heart area.

What this dream has left me with is a sense of love that I can allow to flow through me, that if I look at that love, it flows from me with a real feeling of value within myself. I look forward to seeing where this new sense of self takes me. 

What I also became aware of from this dream was of how much strength I have within myself from becoming the different the people in the coach. This dream has given me a really big inner shift. Beryl has been a part of me for a very long time, which led to feel that I had no worth – I was worthless.

Brenda
« Last Edit: September 04, 2019, 10:00:20 AM by Tony Crisp »

Tony Crisp

  • Global Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 3419
    • View Profile
    • Dreamhawk.com
Re: A Trip Into Being Worthless
« Reply #1 on: September 04, 2019, 09:57:20 AM »
I was in a coach with several people, Sara, Tony someone who was cutting out model airplanes from green metal, others in the background. We were on a long journey to Woolacombe in North Devon. When I spoke/became as the coach I was able to transport myself and others to places they wanted to go, I had lots of space inside me, and comfortable places to be for people.

I then spoke as the green metal that was being cut and moulded into shapes of airplanes and a helicopter , as the helicopter I could rise about the ground of the coach and get an over view of what was going on.
The metal making represented both my parents, who had passed onto me amazing strength, which they had learnt from their life experiences. My mother had grown up from the age of 11 years in an orphanage seemed to be able to do anything without asking for help; she worked full time  as a cook would  make clothes, bake wedding cakes for neighbours , gardening, run the house, without washing machine or fridge. I was told that she was a well read woman though I never saw this; she must have done this between shifts at work.

My father was like a rock, not so noticeable in his skills but a sense that he could handle life. Tony was also a part of me that had strength to look within myself for knowledge. The helicopter could also go within not just above then it connects with the inner world. And Sara was another part of me who had to find the strength to cope with what life brought along, in a way not allowing her emotions to drive her.

Woolacombe was a place of security, and of becoming a parent.

Sara’s mum who was at Woolacombe was a difficult part for me to own, In fact I said, “I Can’t face this.” But as I allowed myself to become her I felt no sense of worth, as if I wanted to curl up and retreat, but staying with this dreadful feeling, Tony asked if I could find something good within myself and what name I could give her as that part of myself. I gave her the name Beryl and I suddenly had a shift and burst of emotions, feeling the wonder of myself having a mothers love. From that I experienced a beautiful feeling of a flower opening, such a shift of feeling, with the petals reaching out, unfolding in a natural way, then a sense of being a seed in my belly and a larger flower coming out from my heart area.

What this dream has left me with is a sense of love that I can allow to flow through me, that if I look at that love, it flows from me with a real feeling of value within myself. I look forward to seeing where this new sense of self takes me. 

What I also became aware of from this dream was of how much strength I have within myself from becoming the different the people in the coach. This dream has given me a really big inner shift. Beryl has been a part of me for a very long time, which led to feel that I had no worth – I was worthless.

Brenda