Lumo – I see the main thing is that you wake up kicking and screaming. That is an obvious sign of an event or of something that is trying to be healed in you. To explain why such powerful movements and emotion occur I will quote from something I have been working on.
During REM sleep while we are dreaming our voluntary muscles are paralyzed – except for our eyes. It is thought this was developed during a period when our forebears were sleeping in trees. Any movement would have made them fall. The eye movements were of course not dangerous.
An important fact about dreaming is that all the signals for movement while we dream are sent by the sleeping brain but are blocked by a part of the brain called the pons. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/man-who-didnt-dream/
This allows for a little recognised phenomenon which, while awake and in a passive state, allows the dream process to break through as spontaneous movement, sound and emotion, exactly as with dreams. … But when this spontaneous movement breaks through to consciousness many people are frightened of it and rush to the doctor to sedate it. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/sleep-paralysis/
– See also http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/lifes-little-secrets/
What hasn’t been said in that piece is ‘can you accept that it is the process of Life that keeps you alive, and that dreams are a process of life in you, so any dreams and nightmares are part of the process that keeps you alive?
The images in your dreams are all simply like icons on your computer. They are tiny little images that are only a reminder, and they do not shows you what is behind them until you click on them. Okay, the question is, how do we click on them? Or more important, if the nightmare is an attempt to heal and preserve my life, why hasn’t it worked?
The truth is that we, our personality, have a relationship with the huge forces of life – unconscious – that give us life. And in many cases – my own as well in my early days of dreaming – that relationship is one of fear. In Genesis it says, “And they heard the voice of the LORD God walking in the garden in the cool of the day: and Adam and his wife hid themselves from the presence of the LORD God amongst the trees of the garden.”
If we translate that into modern English in the terms we have been using, the huge forces of life, which had led the original humans by instinct knew that humans had suddenly woken up to their complete ignorance of their wider life, and so were afraid. We are afraid because we do not trust ourselves.
Also fear builds a huge barrier between our personality and the forces of life. Quiet good in some ways when our injured soul was hurt in childhood and our young ego wasn’t able to deal with the pain. But as you get strong enough to face it you start to have nightmares.
After all, it is only your emotions as there is nothing there except scary images. So you can face it gently in this method - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/practical-techniques-for-exploring-your-dreams/#TalkingAs
– or more daringly in this way - http://dreamhawk.com/body-and-mind/the-arm-circling-meditation/
If you need more information please ask.