Husband

It can depict how you see the relationship with your husband; your relationship with your sexuality; sexual and emotional desire and pleasure; how you relate to intimacy in body, mind and spirit. Or it can be habits of relationship developed with one’s father.

Example: ‘My recurring dream – some disaster is happening. I try to contact the police or my husband. Can never contact either. I try ringing 999 again and again and can feel terror, and sometimes dreadful anger or complete panic. I cry, I scream and shout and never get through! Recently I have stopped trying to contact my husband. I managed once to reach him but he said he was too busy and I would have to deal with it myself. I woke in a furious temper with him and kicked him while he was still asleep.’ Mrs G. S.

The husband here depicts Mrs S’s feelings of not being able to ‘get through’ to her man. This is a common female dream theme, possibly arising from the husband not daring to express emotion or meet his partner with his own feelings. For Mrs S. this is an emergency. Although the dream dramatises it, there is still real frustration, anger, and a break in marital communications.

Cannot find or lost husband or he disappears: Many women dream of ‘losing’ their husband while out with him, perhaps shopping, or walking in a town somewhere. Sometimes the dream portrays him actually killed. If you wonder whether your dream was a premonition, it is more likely a form of practising the loss, so it does not come as such a shock when or if it does happen. The greatest shocks occur when we have never even considered the event – such as a young child losing it’s mother – an event that has never been practised, not even in fantasy, so has no inbuilt shock absorbers. As most of us know, men tend to die before women, and this information is in the mind of married women. Mrs A. D. may have unconsciously observed slight changes in her husband’s body and behaviour, and therefore readied herself.

Example: ‘I dreamt many times I lost my husband, such as not being able to find the car park where he was waiting, and seeing him go off in the distance. I wake in a panic to find him next to me in bed. These dreams persisted, and then he died quite suddenly. He was perfectly healthy at the time of the dreams and I wonder if it was a premonition of me REALLY losing him.’ Mrs A. D.

Example: My husband and I go out somewhere together, mostly in a town or built up area. After a while I lose him, and even though we arrange to meet at a certain place, he’s never there when I arrive. I’m looking everywhere and desperately asking passers by if they have seen him. The sense of loss and panic is awful and people keep saying “Yes, he is over there, or went that way.” I never find him.

Dead husband: Your memories and remaining emotions about your husband. Sometimes a meeting with him. See Dreaming of Death

The example below illustrates the ‘psychic’ meeting some women experience. In anything of an apparently psychic nature, we must ALWAYS remember the unconscious is the great dramatist. It can create the drama of a dream in moments. In doing so it makes our inner feelings into apparently real people and objects OUTSIDE OF US. While asleep we lightly dismiss this amazing process as ‘a dream’. When it happens while our eyes are open or we are near waking, for some reason we call it a ghost, a vision or a psychic event. Yet the dream process is obviously capable of creating total body sensations, emotions, full visual impressions, vocalisation – what else is a dream? On the other hand, the dream process is not dealing in pointless imaginations. Many women tend to believe they have little sexual drive, so it is easier for G. L. to see her drive in the form of her husband. But of course, her husband may also depict how she felt about sex in connection with his ‘sexual appetites’. It is a general rule however, that our dream process will dramatise into a past life, or a ‘psychic’ experience, emotions linked with trauma, or sexual drive, which we find difficult to meet in the present.

Example: ‘My dead husband came into my bedroom and got into bed with me to make love to me. I was not afraid. But owing to his sexual appetites during my married life with him I was horrified, and resisted him with all my might. On waking I felt weak and exhausted. The last time he came to me I responded to him and he never came back again. This happened three times. The last time I don’t think it was a dream. I was not asleep. I think it was his ghost.’ G. L.

Death of husband: If you think about your husband, do you think it is him. No, it is your feelings memories and emotions you feel. That is exactly the same with dreams. It is not your husband you are dealing with directly, but your fears and feeling, your emotions and anxieties.

So dreaming or his death you have been exploring your feelings about him dying. It is not a prediction, and many women dream of their husband dying, and feeling of what it would be like without him. Rather that than never have face his death before it happens.

Example: I had a really horrible dream last night. My husband died. In the dream we were sleeping and when I wake up in the dream I realize that my husband is lying next to me as if he were still sleeping, but he’s not sleeping he’s dead. He died while sleeping. In the dream it’s horrible and we don’t bury him, I cremate him and I go every where with his ashes. I cannot let go of him and I feel so much pain because I won’t see him anymore, hear his voice or feel him. I woke up from the dream crying and turned around and hugged him and kept crying I felt so scared and I felt a lot of pain; it took a while for him to calm me down, I couldn’t stop crying. Right now typing this makes me get a chocked up feeling just thinking about what I felt in that dream makes me feel horrible (in the sense that I might lose him) I hate it and I feel scared. What could that dream mean?

It means that the woman is facing her feelings and anxieties about losing him. But losing him means the loss of support and companionship, of dreams of their future.

Inner husband: Many people do not realise that they have an inner husband equally as powerful as an external husband. You have taken in millions of bit of memory, lessons learnt, life experiences, along with all the feelings or problems met by loving and living with your husband, and they are what makes you the person you are. This is true even if your husband was never there for you – you still have all the memories of him not being there for you filed under ‘husband’. The memories and experience we gather unconsciously change us and are not lost. It is part of you and is symbolised in dreams as a person or event. Such an inner husband can appear in dreams because you are deeply influenced by what you hold within you.

Other woman’s husband: One’s own husband; feelings about that man; desire for a non committed relationship with less responsibility.

Sex with husband: The sexual dream at best is a wonderful indicator of how you, the dreamer, are feeling about your sexual and emotional relationship, or what one longs for, at the time of the dream. At worst it depicts all one fears might happen or be happening.

One can fairly safely say that our dreams are not so much about how the world and other people actually ARE, but rather how we see or passionately FEEL people or the world are. Of course our feelings and views may be very accurate, but one must always be aware of the variance between what one has created out of ones own inner life and vision, and how others people see themselves or events actually are.

Example: I dreamt I was laying in bed with my husband. I felt a sexual attraction and flow, something I hadn’t felt for a while in our relationship. I reached out to him expressing this but there wasn’t any response from him. So I talked to him saying that I had reached out to him sexually and in his body response I had felt there was no attempt to meet me. He replied that in fact that was the situation as far as he was concerned – that he was indeed saying no. Jo K.

Jo and her husband had lived for a year without any sex at all prior to the time of this dream. This had not been an unhappy time. Far from it, they had achieved a lot of peace and warmth without tension. On talking about her dream with her husband, he felt that he wasn’t saying no to her sexually. Indeed, his stated reason for not reaching out to her was that for years it had always been him making the approach to her. This had led to his feeling he was imposing something on her and as this was unpleasant he had stopped any attempt at sexual relationship. So Jo’s dream was really about how she saw her husband rather than what was actually happening. See Surviving Love and Relationships

Useful Questions and Hints:
Is the dream in any way an expression of what I feel or fantasise?
What is the dream dramatising?
Does it express our present state of sexual relationship?
See Difficult Relationship – Dead Partner or Ex – Identity and Sex – Ages of Love

 

 

Comments

-Rose 2018-05-31 17:09:46

In my dream, I saw a man on the floor, lying flat on his back, on a horizontal direction. His left leg pointed on his right side along with his face. He was wearing a Blue Hospital scrubs that my husband used for work. Then, I thought about my husband, when I saw the hospital scrubs. Then, when I saw the person’s face on the floor, it was my husband! His eyes were closed and he was not moving. No blood I’ve seen. There was a box truck that looked like facing me and facing my husband’s head on the left side of the street. And there was another big vehicle on the right side of where my husband was lying down on the ground. On bear left, I saw some bridge with a stairs. Then, I woke up! I woke up calmed but perplexed and bemused. What does it mean?!

-Elizabeth 2018-01-07 23:14:35

I’m sitting in water by a cliff and the water is crystal clear, and suddenly, I turn into a man who is in need of money. I obtain a job and I find a child in the work place -who was a tad slow on the uptake-and I took them in as they did not have any parents. I take them to a soap shop to get hygiene items for the child and I suddenly turn back into myself but the guy and child are still there. I help them and a female security guard calls out to the child to come to her because he won’t be alone anymore. I see how the guy likes the child so much and I end up claiming that I am his mother and the store turns into a tea shop. People around us are commenting on what a beautiful family we are and the guy smiles and does not reject the comments.

    -Tony Crisp 2018-01-14 12:41:31

    Hi – It would help you to understand your dreams, if you would read – http://dreamhawk.com/news/summing-up/ and also http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/features-found-on-site/ which has so much information in.

    Nothing can replace your own ability to understand your dream. With a little effort you can do this by practising what is described in – http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson or http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/getting-at-your-dreams-meaning/

    Tony

    Elizabeth – Crystal clear water and turning into a man and then back again are all aspects of being capable within the inner world of dreams.

    The clear water suggests that the dream allowed you to look deep within yourself. Perhaps the most inclusive description of deepness is that it is expanded awareness. To understand it you have to move beyond a view of the world based on the limitations of your physical senses. For instance the cells in your body are unbroken subdivisions of cells going back to the beginning of life on this planet. In that sense your body is millions of years old and carries that experience. What would it be like for your awareness to expand to include that time span? What would it be like to remember not just your dreams, but your infancy, your life in the womb, or your life in eternity? That is not simply playing within dream images. It can also be remembering who you are in your entirety, and what part you play in the scheme of things. Your present personality, even with great schooling, is just a young thing developed during the life of this body. But it is riding an ancient wonderful life form, your body, and you can find unity with that.

    But it can also link with finding your whole self. A modern view of the personality says that our mind is made up of many modules which are quite distinct. These modules, such as the sexual drive and the ability to speak, usually function in a way which is reasonably integrated. But many areas of dissimilarity are evident if we closely observe the workings of our own responses to life experiences. Because we each hold certain ideas about ourselves – our self image – things we do which do not express this self image may shock or even frighten us. Actions arising from a module of oneself which does not express our accepted self image, may give rise not only to fear, but also a sense of evil, or being possessed by evil. This explains how you can bee all the characters of your dream, for you have a family within you, See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/archetype-of-the-animus-the-male-in-the-female

    You have achieved a lot by recognising the beauty of your inner family. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/characters-or-people-in-dreams/

-Kat 2017-10-27 11:00:39

I had a dream that I helped get my husband smartly dressed for a big party that everyone was going to. As we approached the doors to the party my husband decided then to tell me I wasn’t going and he just left me heartbroken and went into this party by himself. I felt so hurt and like he didn’t even care that he just crushed my heart.

    -Tony Crisp 2017-10-29 11:03:54

    Hi – It would help you to understand your dreams, if you would read – http://dreamhawk.com/news/summing-up/ and also http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/features-found-on-site/ which has so much information in.

    Nothing can replace your own ability to understand your dream. With a little effort you can do this by practising what is described in – http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson or http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/getting-at-your-dreams-meaning/

    Tony

    Kat – You must have a very vulnerable heart to feel crushed by not going to the party and your dream husband not standing by you and almost abandoning you. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/abandoned/

    Abandonment is a serious trauma. But realise that the husband in your dream is an inner husband. You have taken in millions of bit of memory, lessons learnt, life experiences, along with all the feelings or problems met by loving and living with your husband, and they are what makes you the person you are. This is true even if your husband was never there for you – you still have all the memories of him not being there for you filed under ‘husband’. The memories and experience we gather unconsciously change us and are not lost. It is part of you and is symbolised in dreams as a person or event. Such an inner husband can appear in dreams because you are deeply influenced by what you hold within you.

    So your dream is saying that your inner feelings and thoughts about your husband are causing you to feel crushed. That feeling may not represent your outer husband at all, but because we learnt to love or be crushed at an early age it can reflect early feelings connected with your father. So take time to see when the feeling of be crushed and left out of events began. See http://dreamhawk.com/body-and-mind/approaches-to-liberation/#BabyChild

-Tameika 2017-09-12 13:45:46

I have several dreams that startout with my husband and in the middle he always disappear, like I’ll turn around and he’ll be gone and never return in my dream. Every dream with him in it starts out with a bad scene, some type of commotion like a shoot out, robbery, someone trying to hurt us, but during the mist of getting away he vanishes and I’m never harmed and wake up… I need to understand this???

    -Tony Crisp 2017-09-14 8:40:29

    Hi – It would help you to understand your dreams, if you would read – http://dreamhawk.com/news/summing-up/ and also http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/features-found-on-site/ which has so much information in.

    Nothing can replace your own ability to understand your dream. With a little effort you can do this by practising what is described in – http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson or http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/getting-at-your-dreams-meaning/

    Tony

    Many women dream of ‘losing’ their husband while out with him, perhaps shopping, or walking in a town somewhere. Sometimes the dream portrays him actually killed. If you wonder whether your dream was a premonition; it is more likely a form of practising the loss, so it does not come as such a shock when or if it does happen. The greatest shocks occur when we have never even considered the event – such as a young child losing it’s mother – an event it has never been practised, not even in fantasy, so has no inbuilt shock absorbers. As most of us know, men tend to die before women, and this information is in the mind of married women. Your dreams have scenes like a ‘shoot out’ showing that they are things on your mind.

    Mrs A. D. may have unconsciously observed slight changes in her husband’s body and behaviour, and therefore readied herself.

    Example: ‘I dreamt many times I lost my husband, such as not being able to find the car park where he was waiting, and seeing him go off in the distance. I wake in a panic to find him next to me in bed. These dreams persisted, and then he died quite suddenly. He was perfectly healthy at the time of the dreams and I wonder if it was a premonition of me REALLY losing him.’ Mrs A. D.

    Example: My husband and I go out somewhere together, mostly in a town or built up area. After a while I lose him, and even though we arrange to meet at a certain place, he’s never there when I arrive. I’m looking everywhere and desperately asking passers by if they have seen him. The sense of loss and panic is awful and people keep saying “Yes, he is over there, or went that way.” I never find him.

-Sandye 2017-07-04 18:30:29

Hello…My dream was my husband and I were having sexual pleasure in what looked like a huge kitchen. I then found myself in what looked like a cabin(one room) with a triangular roof top. No furniture but there were people inside with me..This cabin had a window in the back and it was dark outside. Through the window I could see a car drive along with a man holding a gun out the window. The next thing I knew there was a lady at the door asking for identification. After going through my wallet and showing her papers, stickers etc…I asked her if she was going to kill me? She answered NO but asked me if I knew S.S.(my husbands full name). I told her he was at work but did not tell her I knew him. I then woke up. I would love if you could help me interpret this dream…I have looked up a few things but your help is greatly appreciated. Thank you!

    -Tony Crisp 2017-07-05 8:40:21

    Hi – It would help you to understand your dreams, if you would read – http://dreamhawk.com/news/summing-up/ and also http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/features-found-on-site/ which has so much information in.

    Nothing can replace your own ability to understand your dream. With a little effort you can do this by practising what is described in – http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson or http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/getting-at-your-dreams-meaning/

    Tony

    Sandye – You dream starts with you getting back to your basics – sex and the cabin.

    The man with a gun and the woman at your door suggests a serious self questioning.
    The sort one does when you get a sense of something and go in search of answers. You also sensed that your inner man/husband is something you felt you needed to hide.

    Many people do not realise that they have an inner husband equally as powerful as an external husband. You have taken in millions of bit of memory, lessons learnt, life experiences, along with all the feelings or problems met by loving and living with your husband, and they are what makes you the person you are. This is true even if your husband was never there for you – you still have all the memories of him not being there for you filed under ‘husband’. The memories and experience we gather unconsciously change us and are not lost. It is part of you and is symbolised in dreams as a person or event. Such an inner husband can appear in dreams because you are deeply influenced by what you hold within you.

    What secrets are you keeping about that part of you? Maybe find out by using http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson

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