Ana – You are mixing up your waking life with your dream self. Nothing can kill you or harm you in your dreams. What happens is that we run in panic from our own fears and emotions. And because we are avoiding our fears, they can chase us forever.
When you felt a change in your dream, it was because the intensity of your fear lessened. If you faced the fear it would change into a scene of beauty – believe me I have done it.
Please see
https://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/masters-of-nightmares/ I know that if you use some of what is said you can dream a new life.
A man exploring his dream of seeing someone murdered, said:
In ‘being’ the dead body in the dream the man said, “But it wasn’t until I got into the role of the dead body that any depth of feelings emerged. Almost as soon as I was in the role of the dead body I began to think about and feel things connected with the way I had killed my sexuality as a teenager. Gradually these feelings deepened and I was describing my feeling hatred in regard to sexuality and how the masses were pulled along by their genitals into some sort of conformity and performance. I felt anger and loathing for what I felt at the time were the cattle human beings were. At the time I despised and hated them. I also felt repugnance at the way people talked about sex or appeared to enjoy it. It has to be understood that in that period in history in the UK, most of sex was depicted in terms of smut, dirt, animal desire, hidden pornography, or loveless fucking. I wept deeply, at times hardly able to breathe, with the pain of seeing what I had done to myself. I said sorry over and over. I saw that I need not have killed my love and sexuality, but could have expressed it in a tender and loving way.
So ask yourself, "What do I feel is being killed in my, or what am I murdering in myself by suppressing or being terrified of." The man was using
https://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson Tony