Omega – I feel the Truth is very difficult to capture, except “with light speckled all over the shot.” For you were seeing your own inner truth in the intense colour of the light. Later you wrote, “as if I'd conjured it.” Of course you created it, not by conjuring, by by being you.
The church has a dark history, especially by making people shit scared of sin and dying. But I had a dream that was quite revealing.
“I was with several other people searching the rubble of what had been a great church. The building, ruined by some disaster such as an earthquake, or perhaps internal weakness, was now no more than a ruin of stones. Amongst the rubble we searched for anything that might be salvaged. Suddenly, among the stones that at one time made up a wall near the door, I found a most wonderful chalice. Its wonder was not because of any precious metal it was made of, or from artistry. It was because the stemmed cup shone with its own light, a light that never diminished. Just seeing it, being near it, produced an experience of awe and wonder.
As we took up the cup we understood that it was the emanation of this light around which the church had been built. Yet out of some fear, the chalice had been hidden in the wall of the church, and stranger yet, completely forgotten. With feelings moved by this tragedy we realised that for perhaps hundreds of years people had continued to attend the church, performing empty rituals, singing hymns, going through all the motions of worship without any direct relationship with the wonderful manifestation of the divine the cup gave. But now we could once more place the chalice in a place where anyone could stand in its light. For it shone on all without exception, and each of us, as we were permeated by that divine light, were transformed in some way by it.”
Yes, the church does somewhere have the wonderful Mystery.
Seeing that light yourself in some way you sang out. In dreams we cry out and sing these songs, and in doing so we are baring our souls and sharing our agony, our divinity, our wonder at life. To sing your song often means that you are giving voice to your very essence, so should be taken seriously. To be unable to sing your song means you are being held back and cannot release and so complete yourself – so you cannot live fully.
I get the feeling about the end of the dream the people around you had no idea of the significance of what you experienced- for Truth is very difficult to capture, except “with light speckled all over the shot;” perhaps even for you?
Tony