Dead End

[Patie]

Tony,

Again I am sending a dream.  Most I can work out from your very informative site, but some seem too big for me.  I am in a slow developing relationship for two years following marriage breakdown eight years ago.  I go through bouts of anxieties and affection with regard to the relationship, and have been described by boyfriend as always having "one foot in one foot out" ever ready to leave.  So as he is in this dream, I need assistance working it out.

I am in a bare room hunched in a corner with another heavy set woman about my age in another corner diagonally across from me.  We are both frightened, listening for the shooters.  I have a black blanket half covering myself, hunched up.  The other lady is standing with a pink cardigan on her, she is almost in forties style clothing.  We just keep looking at each other with wild frightened eyes, listening.  Then the door bursts open and my boyfriend has a gun and shoots the other lady.  He is also dressed as if in a "forties" movie.  The then becons me to come on, come on, don't be afraid, trust me.  The dream then changes.  I am following his instructions to drive to a particular location.  It is pitch black.  I am driving my car down a dark, very narrow country lane.  The lane seems to get narrower and narrower, and I get more and more anxious.  I stay going despite the fact, that I am concerned I will get trapped.  Then the car can hardly pass between two trees, a big black hole in the road, everything is getting narrower, then I start to panic because I have reached a dead end.  This end feels and looks like the car has been jammed by an old white washed style wall and the problem is - there is no-where to go, I cant even reverse.  It ends there!!

Hope you can help.

[Tony Crisp]

Patie - The dream seems like an exact reflection of what you are feeling - extreme anxiety followed by a level of trust followed by feeling as if there is not way out for you.

The woman who was shot is probably representing old style values and life style. It was probably something you inherited from you parents. To understand it see http://dreamhawk.com/interesting-people/animal-children/#Program and http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/the-conjuring-trick/

Anxiety and fear are great barriers to happiness, and unfortunately most of them are habits caused by our programming, but there are excellent ways to deal with them. See http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/questions-2/#FaceFear

The end of the dream is an apparent dead end, but from the dream point of view it is the way through to a new life - if you dare to face it. Trust me when I say that all dreams are a way of showing or producing a healing in you - even the terror of nightmares is an attempt to bring relief. It would take to long to explain here, so please see http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/lifes-little-secrets/

The thing that causes so many problems is their automatic pulling back from what frightens or causes pain. That is fine in the world of the body and waking, but is absolute rubbish in the dream world. You cannot actually be hurt in the dream world - all that can happen is that you will run wildly or refuse to face what frightens or appears painful. Yet it is having the courage to go up to what ever faces you - death, injury, sexual assault, being shot, mauled by an animal, demons - and go up to them and say, “Come on then, what is the worst you can do to me? Wake me up, leave me feeling scared, frightens the lights out of me? Yet every time that happens to me I am NEVER actually hurt. So do your worse, or even better I will chase you and give you hell!!”

So the big black hole you face in your dream imagine yourself going to it and jump in. The difficult feeling only lasts for a moment, then you are through the fear and there is no dead end. I know because I have done it myself countless times, and when I worked as a therapist led others through it to freedom.

Tony

[Patie]

Tony,

Thank you so much.  Your assistance is greatly appreciated.

P