Wasp

[Omega]

I am wearing very high heels, a kind I wouldn't wear and find over the top. My sisters tell me to take them off that they are awful, I do and realise I only have an old pair of runners or slippers. I think well it would be disrespectful to be at a wedding in casual footwear and I put back on the heels despite the pressure and disapproval from my sisters. (Perhaps this is the dream self following advice you gave to allow itself be the centre of atttention - for this is probably what the sisters do not like, and the dreamself realises there are other condiderations beyond placating her sisters) One sister is wearing a dress that copies mine, but she is overweight and I feel her anger about my figure manifested in the copying, though her surface is all cheery. 

I find an oblong seed, it's tiny. It drops on the floor and becomes a tiny insect, a green shield (stink) bug, I decide it needs moisture (it's my nature to always help)  and I use my saliva and it starts to come to life. Then I get scared that the insect will be a negative force and able to control me through my 'life energies' in the spittle. So I get a glass of water (still bringing it to life) Suddenly it turns into a very very angry wasp which starts to attack me with absolute determination, I throw the glass of water at it, but it's so easy for it to avoid it, as if I and the water are just slow motion to the wasp. I spin round clutching my hood over my head, trying to keep my face protected.

[Tony Crisp]

Omega – Remember that your sisters in the dreams are all inner world creatures – and so what part of your thinking and feeling do they show you? I quote from Summing Up, “Nearly always when people dream about someone they know or a strange new person or situation they automatically believe the dream is about that person, situation or animal. But when we think of our friend or partner our thoughts are not them – just our thoughts and feelings about them. So dream images are ways of communicating via our associations not actual things or people. In the world of dreams our most intimate fears and longings are given an exterior life of their own in the form of the people, objects and places of our dream.”

You have a talent to swing between the opposites and often land on the nasty side. “I decide it needs moisture (it's my nature to always help) and I use my saliva and it starts to come to life. Then I get scared that the insect will be a negative force and able to control me through my 'life energies' in the spittle. So I get a glass of water (still bringing it to life) Suddenly it turns into a very, very angry wasp which starts to attack me with absolute determination.”

It is probably your thoughts, feelings and beliefs, “I get scared that the insect will be a negative force and able to control me through my 'life energies'” that create the outcome of the dream.

Statistically you and I have very little chance of being shot or being crushed by a falling building. But there is every likelihood that we are already imprisoned, even tortured or manipulated by things we do not even acknowledge as being dangerous or capable of trapping us. But we are all victims or captives of what we believe in. What we believe or imagine about who we are, or what we are not, is for many people an incredibly potent torturer and jailer. But many of what people call their demons are unbelievably subtle, and capture us, restrict us, shut out the possibility of a full life, or being able to respond with our own creativity. The real problem is that we often accept this as normal or barely notice them.

These situations of imagining things we fear, of being trapped by what we feel others will not like about us; of being frightened of dying,  of twisting the nature of who we really are in an attempt to get love or acceptance; being imprisoned by what we are convinced is true about life and the world; denying emotional pain and our own feelings; the awful fight some of us have with our basic drives such as hunger, sex and our need for love, are more prevalent evils than gunmen, terrorism or social upheaval.

Do you feel any of this is helpful? See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/integration-meeting-oneself/#Ox

Tony

[Omega]

Thank-you Tony.

I am trying to take ownership of the energies in my life  - but I battle against the idea that I AM always all these energies. I feel that sometimes people do represent themselves - esp if it's a processing at work, eg gaining greater awareness of family dynamics. Though I will also have absorbed those relationships into my inner world and inner self-understanding.

Waking world: I think we are separate beings with individual agency in duality. And as someone who has been very 'enmeshed' with others. I need to first find solid footing in being an individual. It can get very confusing until you know how to carefully be aware of your role in dynamics - you may be attracting aggression - but you are not that energy. You are the energy of 'receiving aggression' . I have been deeply confused by this in the past, feeling I could not set boundaries on poor behaviour - because after all their energy was mine!


Dream world: I regularly forget to apply the concept of myself being all the energies & it is very helpful when I am guided back to this way of approaching the dream - I feel it is accurate in the dream world. And people appear because of your need to integrate something they represent to you.

Reflecting now, I see the swinging between opposites that you pointed out is very interesting.
In the dream I don't trust the energy I am sensing, my 'do-good' training over-rides my instincts...an intense need to always be the good helpful person.  In waking life a recurrent experience for me has been that of exposing myself to dangerous characters and not being able to follow gut instinct.

So yes a belief is causing this pattern - but the belief was formed over years and years of repeated experience, so it has quite a gravitational force and will not be undone without contextual beliefs also changing. Eg I need to believe I am more important than the insect and that my feelings about it may contain valuable information.

So there are two stances possible to take (a) I should not fear anything ever (b) sometimes fear is just useful information

This is my current approach - never dismiss a fear or emotion - thank it for the message it brings. If I were to relive the dream I would say to myself 'trust your fear'


Once I developed my ability to consciously hear and take on board the fear - my next stage would be to find a more empowered expression of myself in the dream. Because on another level I am the dream maker - but I am also my undeveloped unintegrated psychic energies that need what they need.

I am trying very hard to make specific distinctions here - because I spent a long time mired in confusion.
Perhaps these distinctions are really only important to my particular path..?  what do you think of this?

[Tony Crisp]

Omega - I know how difficult it is to find your way through the enormous complexity that we are. I often believe it becomes easier as we learn to listen to ALL of our self. Sometimes it takes a lot of searching and questioning to find what works. I once suddenly felt I was going mad. I had never drunk alcohol as a pass time, but at that time I had a great urge to go out and get drunk to ease the feelings.

But instead I drove my car out to moorlands and set about examining myself to find what was wrong. I thought it something wrong with me and searched through all the departments of me and could f ind nothing wrong - so did it again with the same result.

So then I asked a different question - Where is this pain coming from? Immediately a different response. I was shown that my mother in law, who was staying with us, was quietly plotting against me. How the hell  I knew that I don't know, except that unconsciously we are in touch with everyone. I saw that this woman wanted me out of my wife's life so she could take over running the place.

I went back home, my madness gone, and my wife was out but arrive soon after me. I asked her what had happened while she was out, she told me her mother had talked about wanted me to leave my her so then she could live with my wife. I immediately went to my wife's mother and told her to leave. My problem was solved.

So I can understand how your 'intense need to always be the good helpful person' could stand in your way of asking the right question and finding a satisfying answer.

But it might help if you realise that you/we are a finely tuned and highly sensitive life form, as such you can be moved by events, people, your own thoughts and beliefs and no one gives you a handbook of instructions. But here are a few ways to change gear, put the brake on or even steer you vehicle See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/learning-the-brake-gears-and-accelerator/ and even http://dreamhawk.com/inner-life/using-your-intuition-1/

Tony