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Dreams => Healing Dreams => Topic started by: V on August 06, 2017, 04:01:24 PM

Title: giving birth - very detail-rich dream
Post by: V on August 06, 2017, 04:01:24 PM
Hi Tony,

I had a dream which has a lot of meaning, but I still can’t get a hack of the meaning behind the little details.

I dreamt that I gave birth. The dream seemed to be the continuation of a dream I already had but which I don’t remember. Apparently, I already gave birth previously to a baby boy, and not long before this second child birth, to the point that in the dream I seemed “skilled” and well-prepared.
I was in a hospital room giving birth, and the birth did not seem as painful as it is in reality, and went on quickly (so much so I remember little detail). I didn’t see the baby straight away (nor were there the big emotions, the crying of the baby etc.). The birth was so natural that when I got up from the bed/chair I was wearing clothes I wear regularly everyday these days, and I looked pretty much how I look now. It all seemed more like a visit to the gynaecologist rather than a childbirth! However I am sure I gave birth to a baby in that room. When I got up from the chair/bed it looked clean and all ready for seeing a new patient. There were some stains of menstruation blood on it, and I said sorry to the nurse there. Apparently, I had my period in the dream before getting in, I gave birth, and then immediately the period came back (which is unreal, and is a detail I can’t get the hack of). I believe in the room there was only a midwife and a nurse, and in any case there were women only. In the whole dream I do not recall an adult male presence, maybe amongst the people in the background, but no adult male doing some significant action nor was there a thought in the dream that this baby was conceived with someone.
I do not have to stay in the hospital in observation, so I’m sent back home directly (again, it was quick! an outpatient treatment basically). I don’t see the baby, because apparently they deliver the baby directly to your home, and thats when you get to see it. I go towards a lift, and I’m sure in the lift there was a lady, M. I’m not sure whether she was in the room, or outside waiting, but I’m sure she was with me from the lift point onwards. In the dream, we are very close, but more in a sense of me being very familiar and relaxed around her, I can be myself without thinking how I come across. M. is someone from work, but I do not know if that workplace existed in the dream and whether that was the link between us in the dream. I do not know in which country the dream was in, nor am I sure what language was used. I’m sure it was a place where I felt at home and no need to escape somewhere else. I was also at a place in my life where I did not know to discover other places and was content with an everyday routine.
next thing we arrive (by foot I believe) to the building where I live, apparently a tower block, but not very high (max 12-15 stores). I think it was black-brown, and maybe from the 80’s/90s style of my home country. There was a very big garden/playground before the block (so much so that the block looked a bit far ahead). The garden had a central rectangular section and two smaller rectangular sections to its edges, with paths with little stones in between. The angles were rounded. there was probably a big fountain, however not sure, and definitely the weather was not sunny, but rather grey and darkish (not sure what season it was).
There are kids playing around, and I think M. by this time says goodbye and leaves. I set out to go through the gardens and home, where my first baby, a boy, is waiting for me. I don’t remember his name, and apparently he was still a baby, possibly even younger than the 9 months it would have taken me to give birth to another baby. I don’t know who was staying with him, probably nobody. And I was not worried! I don’t even see this first baby in the dream, I only know he’s there because i remember I already gave birth and not long ago. I don't know his name from the dream, and I didn't seem to care much about him, about being a mom in general (but nor did the people around us.. it all seemed very relaxed). I only know it's a boy. I also have no idea how my flat looks like inside, etc. And I have no idea in the dream who I conceived this baby boy with. No men in sight in the dream.
So all in all this second child birth took maybe an afternoon, and it I was relaxed and calm, no pain nor during nor after the birth (don’t remember before the birth, as that wasn’t in the dream), no post-operative, nothing. Just like a specialist visit in hospital. No big emotions of seeing your baby coming, etc…no worry about the system of delivering the baby directly to your home, no security concerns. the baby was supposed to be delivered in a pram, and left there for me to find it!! Hence a lot of trust to everybody.
As I go through the garden I realise that the baby is not with me (as if I suddenly remember about it!!), nor at the entrance of the building. M., then, shouts from the other end of the garden (but she was on her way out) “look, the nurse left it at the the entry of the gardens!”. I turn around and she a (rather big) pram in the distance, beneath a very very big tree (that has leaves). It looked as if abandoned, but strangely safe. I didn’t feel “omg the baby is all alone there” in the dream. It all felt normal and natural.

On my way to the pram, I bump into some kids playing. Amongst them, a boy (possibly the only male character with whom I interact in the whole dream). This kid is jumping and laughing with the kids, and then turns around, stops in the middle of the path, looks at me and smiles/laughs a bit like kids do in a mischievous way. He looks at me straight in the eyes, and we spend a bit of time looking at each other straight into the eyes. The kid was probably 7-9 y.o, and he was dressed and looked immensely like my father in a very old picture of his as a kid. This kid was a bit mischievous from his smile (totally my dad), but his glance looked sweet, kind, well-wishing….a bit like when I dreamed of my father accompanying me to my new baptism. BUT… somehow his eyes reminded me of my mom’s eyes in a picture of my first birthday where she looks directly at the camera. Every time I look at that picture, which is actually one of the very few pictures of us together and happy as a family her eyes in that photo affect me so much. So the eyes of this kid in the dream were probably a mix of both my parent’s eyes(I think it is key that in that picture of him as a kid my dad wore sunglasses, so I cannot see his eyes there).
Now, strangely, I feel like the building is not a block anymore but rather a more ancient building with an arch in between, which opens to a more secluded community, a bit as you can find in both the countries of my parents. But this sensation lasts as long as I’m with this kid, then I feel the building is again the tower block.

I then get to the pram, which is very big, for 4-6 babies to be held together in a row (and I illogically say to myself: yes it must have been that they used this pram because it was born a bit more little—but I hadn’t seen it! and I didn’t know the sex yet!). On the very left “seat”/compartment was my baby. The pram wasn’t regular, it sort of had a plastic semi-transparent panel covering the actual bed where the babies would lie, and this could opened with a zip that went all around (in reality a baby would have died of lack of air, but not in the dream!!). I open the zip, and I finally get to see the baby (whom I hadn’t missed or died to see on my way home from the hospital). She is wearing a onesie that looks mostly like a ski suit (especially the material), and which is fuchsia (maybe referring to a chakra?). She looked little indeed. I pick her up and I tell her “hello V., hello my V.”. Only at that moment I am basically informed that she is a baby girl. I somehow already knew the name (i.e.,I wasn’t coming up with a name when I saw her), and the name turned out to be my own name! When I said “hello (my name)”, I pronounced my name in the way people from my mother’s country pronounce it (and also my mom too, but with less accent). I must have told her something like “now let’s go home” and started walking towards home (the building).

I am sure this dream is dense with meaning. I haven’t given birth in reality. I’m rather in a midlife crisis (and my father only died four months ago), so much so that this link (http://dreamhawk.com/pregnancy-childbirth/childbirth-as-initiation-2/) on your website really resonated with where I am now. Incidentally, I think the very depth of my midlife crisis, from which I truly started to change and become different, started about 9 months ago. Right now I am getting more and more answers, but I feel unable to make decisions, and not because I don’t want to, but because I feel that I’m still “gathering data” to make a truly conscious decision for my future and not just another jump in the dark as I did in younger years. I do feel in away still down into this process the article talks about
At the same time, I dreamed this just a few days before going back to do some work after my father died, and being worried of course of not having enough time for my spiritual work, and how to integrate this into a “regular” life ( a life in which I am reborn?), in which I have to work, and interact with people and their energies. I am somehow worried of letting others’ energies contaminate the answers I am getting. 

In reality, M. is a lady I owe much to. She is a secretary/ admin in one place where I work, and she was instrumental in me getting my first assignment there, which led to other jobs and assignments which set my life as it now in motion (ie., financial independence, and a lot of time to get to know myself, realizing my mom’s narcissistic disorder, discovering love etc.). I am thinking now of moving on from this job, and have mixed feelings about leaving a place that has been like home for me but is not instrumental to my professional and personal growth anymore. M. has also been very helpful at the time and after my father died (especially in liaising with my boss). In a way, she was a gatekeeper to this new page of my life that is somehow coming to an end, or which rather was a stepping stone towards other places/career paths. In a way, M. is a bit motherly towards me in a workplace where people are not very tightly knit.

Did I give birth to myself? Why was it not painful, why the menstruation?
Was the kid a mix of both my parents? If so, why did he look 99% like my dad, but only something reminiscent of my mom? Why did I bump into him on my way to my own child with my very same name (and pronounced with my mom’s accent)? And he stood in my way and we looked at each other deeply into the eyes? Given my mom’s mental disorder which I am only recently come to terms with, I feel pretty disconnected from my heritage from my mom’s side, and I have difficulties integrating her as being a part of me.
Why was the pram so much bigger (accommodating more kids..?more parts of me..?)? Why this lady, M.? I also think this enormous security in the dream, the relaxedness, the fact the babies did not seem so important to me (and that I did not seem to care much about my first baby, a boy….hence we are not even that sure that he was there…). In any case I  wasn’t tending to them like a mother would do, although possibly a bit more connected to the new child with my own name,

Thanks if you can help, I can feel this dream means a lot to me.
Title: Re: giving birth - very detail-rich dream
Post by: V on August 06, 2017, 04:03:15 PM
Also, the baby wasn't crying, it was more like a living toy, nor do I remember a painful experience of my first childbirth.
Title: Re: giving birth - very detail-rich dream
Post by: Tony Crisp on August 07, 2017, 01:56:28 PM
V – WOW – You went for it – so many symbolic meanings, but let’s start from the beginning.

To start with it is not natural to have a painful birth – See http://dreamhawk.com/pregnancy-childbirth/childbirth-as-initiation-2/ -

Having dream babies is natural, because you are a woman; it is about your wonderful power of creation. But what I see is that those drives need not be expressed through producing a physical child. It is innate in women to dream of being creative and giving birth in their dreams. So I believe that such a dream baby is a very real part of you – though an inner and not an outer part.

You can be creative in many different ways without having to give birth to a physical baby. But your dream baby represents a new aspect of you trying to emerge and be cared for and developed. It can be in music and the arts, in caring or interests of any sort. So watch out for emerging new aspects of you. Also, I have never seen a dream baby cry – talk straight away certainly,

The period is another sign of your fertility; perhaps as it is the second dream baby that you remember, there may be other babies – a flood of personal growth. If you are in tune with your inner life, then such changes happen often. Each of us are immersed in a ‘river’ of constant change. If you think about it you have been carried, pushed, impelled by this current as you were moved through babyhood, childhood, teenage and adulthood. And as we passed through these changes we died to our old self in order to change to the new. It is the current if Life. This current then carries us on through old age and through gates of death. All the time we are faced by decisions, and each decision directs us on a different path, helping to create our future. And this force of growth and change. And is fought like hell by many as we are afraid of such changes, especially getting old and facing death.

Delivering your baby directly to your home, in dream terms says that home is what you have created with your life and are comfortable with. So your new aspect is already in you ready to get on with your everyday living.

Also, if there was no man involved in the dream you experienced a virgin birth. This represents the human soul or psyche and its possibility of dropping pre-conceptions, thus attaining an inner virginity and through that being receptive to the unseen or unconscious side of self. When we experience this personally, the child we conceive is the union between the receptive conscious self and your forces of Life in you. This receptivity and virginity of mind leads to the birth in oneself of a force or activity that gradually transforms and enlarges ones life and experience. See http://dreamhawk.com/news/how-i-became-a-virgin/  -

The lady with you is an inner person, and you use her image to remind you of a feelings state. When you think about a friend or a person you know, you are only taking in your thoughts, impressions and feelings about them. So, many people do not realise that they have an inner person equally as powerful as the external person you know. You have taken in millions of bits of memory, lessons learnt, life experiences along with all the feelings or problems met by meeting or living with them, and they change you and make you the person you are. The memories and experience we gather unconsciously change us and are not lost. It is part of you and is symbolised in dreams as a person or event. Such an inner person can appear in dreams because you still carry the memories or impressions of them, and so they influenced what you hold within you. But it is important remember that Dream images are like icons on a computer screen - You have to ‘click’ on your dream images to make them come alive.
Thinking about them doesn’t work. You need to open yourself to the magic of them. 
To make them into the wonderful gateways they are you may have to learn certain skills. And what’s in it for you?

Maybe http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/practical-techniques-for-understanding-your-dreams/

“9 months it would have taken me to give birth to another baby.” V, you are still thinking in terms of having a physical body. But basically in dreams you do not need a body; you are a shape shifter, can predict the future and are out of space and time. While in the dream state you are in a totally different environment – you are amazing – but what you believe conditions what you experience. See http://dreamhawk.com/news/there-is-a-huge-change-happening/ - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/dimensions-of-human-experience/

Trust the baby is alright – unless you fear otherwise. Because in this world you create your own heaven or hell.

The boy you will have to find out for yourself – it is magical what you can experience – a synthesis of so much so difficult to describe, but you can experience, as above – clicking on.

Babies in dreams do not need to breathe – in reality they have no physical body – nor do you. The V baby is actually created by you and Life so it is you – for you are life for you are alive – an amazing miracle of life – we all are.

The boy you met was probably the baby boy also – kids can grow up so quickly in heaven/the dream world.

A lot reply, but it shortened even so. I hope to makes sense.  :)

Title: Re: giving birth - very detail-rich dream
Post by: V on August 14, 2017, 02:06:14 AM

Thank you so much for you reply, it helps connect bits and pieces of insight I have from my own exploration. It is such an exciting process! I find that looking at dreams over and over at a distance of time is also working a lot for me, a bit like re-reading certain literature and getting different insights each time and connecting to other dreams.

One detail - the dream definitely seems to be a lot about me transitioning to a stage of being a creator. As such, it should be conveying positive stuff (or, at least, neutral). But why was the sky so grey? It was grey, and dark (a bit like British weather   :( ) but that kind of covered sky with absolutely no ray of sunshine (again, no male presence in the dream, maybe the lack of sun signifies that?) and no feeling like it's going to rain, but rather a feeling that a sky like that is the normal and regular and not pre-rain. The sky was gloomy and depressing, but no one was affected by that. Why such a contrast?

Many many thanks!

Title: Re: giving birth - very detail-rich dream
Post by: Tony Crisp on August 14, 2017, 02:05:23 PM
V -The process of growth is not a straight climb upwards, but a process of meeting the feelings, fears, truamas that are blocking you, your creation. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/growth-of-something/

Also maybe http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/trauma/#Examples