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Messages - Davshan

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I just had another very strange dream. Woke up crying.
I was called to visit my aunt, who I haven't seen for a long time, but recently spoke of. I was told she has a cancer and can't fight it anymore. She had only a few days left. When I arrived, I was very sad and was ready to see her being very sick. She didn't look that sick, but had a huge bandage warped around her shoulder. You could see that there was some inflamation under the bandages and it was really bad. My aunt was smiling and looked happy. So she talked to me about this deases and her soon departure as a meter of fact. Then she left and I had realized that she was acting like that knowing that she only has a couple of days left. I thought to myself that she forced herself to smile despite the terrible pain that her friend said she had, just so I don't get upset....Sudenly, I am in my grand mother room. My grand mother is laying in her bed. I am standing next to her. She has a box with some kind of papers inside and starts showing it to me. She is telling me that this box has all of the papers and clothes necessary to bury her. She keeps on talking about that. I am trying to convince her that it is too early for her to talk about duying. She is saying no, it is not to early. My grand mother shows also that she took care of me by transferring her bank account to my name. I am thinking to myself that it is unbelievable that she took time to make it easy for me, she loves me. She is saying she is too old and it will happen soon, so she wants me to know where everything is so it will be easier for me to bury her.
I woke up crying and crying, and crying with a very uneasy feeling of something bad happening soon. Since both of the relatives are from my mother side, I started thinking that something bad might happen to my mother.

However, I had looked up some words in your dictionary. From what I understood, my life is going through some changes. I can see some connection of this to the little birds flying away in my other dream that I had seen recently. Am I really going through some major changes in my life?

Sorry, Tony, I haven't gotten a chance to look at the links you provided me with in your last reply. There might be answers to my question there. However, Powerful Stroke of Insight video left me speechless. It is unbelievable how much did Jill learn from her experience. What she was saying, had helped me to look at some aspects of my life differently.
Thank you for your help!

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Tony,
I appreciate your reply a lot!
You are right about a habitual believe. It was created by a male figure in my life. I started figuring that out. Now, I have to figure out what is natural me. I know it might sound strange, but I feel kind of lost: I don't know what am I anymore, I choose jobs that someone else thinks would be a good job for me. I am not being physically forced to do anything, but end up doing almost everything what other want me to do. Well, I feel lost. I felt a lot more secured 10 years ago.
Lately, I started realizing more and more that I am leaving the life that someone else wants me to live. Now, I have to figure out what my natural I is. I've been trying to do it some time, but can't come up with any solutions so far.
I see you have a lot of books being offered on Amazon.com. Would you suggest any of them for my situation?
Thank you again for your response. I really appreciate it a lot!

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I had a very strange dream today. I remember being in a small house, and I think had an argument with someone. Can't remember that part clearly. Then, I went outside and ended up staying in the middle of a country side. There were beautiful green fields with short grass very nicely trimmed. There were electricity wires. The sky was very clear and blue with very small spots of clouds which were almost invisible. Then, someone (I believe that was the person I had argued with before. Couldn't see the person, just heard the voice. I think it was a male's voice) had told me that the birds are flying away and we need to catch them. I saw many very small, blue and green, very beautiful birds flying over the electric wires. The birds were chirping and flying kind of chaotically, but still toward one direction.  I enjoyed looking at them, but the voice was telling me I have to catch them, because they supposed to be in a cage. I started running after them, but as soon as I would reach one, it would just chirp and fly away. I remember feeling worried that I wouldn't be able to catch them, and they will fly away. At the end, it started getting darker and I wasn't able to catch them. I felt worried.
I woke up feeling worried and happy at the same time. It was a very strange feeling.
Please help me understand why had I seen this dream. I have a feeling it might have some important for me meaning.

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