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Messages - Christine

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Dream Interpretation / Re: Dream Image
« on: November 28, 2017, 02:08:07 PM »
Thank you Tony.  I have been feeling like a mammal lately...warm blooded and solid...so that description resonates.

I do not dream as much as I used to...that night I only remembered that image.  Of course I will read through the information in the links.

Dream Interpretation / Dream Image
« on: November 27, 2017, 02:24:38 PM »
Black dog lying in front of or against a black door.  It looked like the inside of a door and not the outside.  I could not tell if the dog was sleeping or dead.

(In reality I have moved into a home where the owner owns a large black dog.  It is a Bouvier des Flandres and yes it was the one in the dream.  I have never liked dogs and have been especially afraid of big ones.  I love THIS dog.

In the past I have dreamt about having a big black dog on a leash.  At the time I thought of it as having my aggression on a leash.  And yes I have feared others aggression...and my own death from it.  I have lied, pretended, sought to please, and abandoned others because of my fear of aggression.

I am not sure how this relates to the door.)

Dream Interpretation / Trio
« on: July 10, 2017, 09:09:49 AM »
During the same night....

1)  I am on a stage with other women.  We are all wearing womens clothes, yet I feel and I know I am a man in my body.  I feel like, all these other women, I am expected to wear the clothes and play a role.  A woman next to me says what is that smell?  Your clothes smell like lavender.  She says "You have to tell them."  I know I am expected to sing...the woman on my right is singing...I think I am her understudy possibly.  I take out a mouth guard I am wearing and I cab feel that I have all my teeth and I start singing "Renuzit" which is the name of an air freshener brand.

2)  I am in a seminar like room full of women...a woman asks the group what self - esteem has to do with myth...I tell her that I was raised to play a role...be a caretaker...I had a large extended blood related family...and now I am by myself and all I want to be is a lucky star.  The point I was trying to make is that, for me, being a caretaker did nothing for my self-esteem.  It was actually detrimental to it. I bought into it, played the role and now refuse to play it anymore.

Next I am in my parents backyard sitting at the picnic table...I am repeating what I told the women to my father...on the table there is a Sunday New York Times and the magazine section's cover is back and mostly gold.  On the cover it says Self - Esteem and Myth.

3)  I am in a Gynecologists office.  I lay on the table and have my knees bent but closed together.  The female nurse or doctor puts an ultrasound device on my stomach.  Instead of two ovaries I see my hypothalamus.  It is a beautiful light to medium blue to dark blue color.  I know the hypothalamus is considered by some to be the third eye. I ask about my ovaries and the nurse says let me test them...she goes to some small device and an oval indicator lights up yellow and then turns the same blue color.  And the second one I ask?  Same thing.  I get up from the table and a woman who looks like a younger version of myself...thin, long blond hair, a gold nurses outfit...turns and says "follow me."  She gestures with her hand and finger to come closer and follow her.

She points me to some spilled liquid on a counter next to a faucet.  It looks like water and coffee.



Dream Interpretation / Re: The weirdest
« on: July 10, 2017, 08:38:10 AM »
I have had a few dreams about him too.  In one dream his face was on a breadstick or french baguette that was inserted into my vagina.  It was going up and down and he was laughing.

I am pretty sure this is about our, as women, anxiety about him being in the position of President...maybe fear of us losing power or going backwards.  I do think a lot of the gains we have made are internal and those can never be taken away by anyone.  I also believe in the pendulum effect...politics swings left and then right...and then left and right.  It does take a long time for society's values to change.

Dream Interpretation / Re: The weirdest
« on: July 04, 2017, 02:47:02 AM »
Your dream is so interesting.  Do you remember who was driving the car or where you and he were sitting?  Do you remember any colors?

Was he pushing on you in the car or in some other location?

The location of the pushing would seem to be around your diaphragm, which would relate to your breathing.  I am wondering if there is someone in your waking like that, when you think of them or are around them, you tense up and find it difficult to relax and breathe.  Or it might be a part of you and your inner critic...for me he is a dark man.

Glad to meet you Christina!

Dream Interpretation / Re: Vacation/Ex/Facing my Mom
« on: June 21, 2017, 10:32:12 AM »
M - As I revisited everything you wrote, and Tony's as well, three things came to mind...we can often get distracted by other people, we need to respond to others when they do distract us and as Tony implied, a need to balance internal processing with external steps and progress.  The latter could also be described as a balance between being and doing.

People have different ways of being and doing.  I grew up with very goal oriented parents who gave mostly conditional love.  There was a lot of pressure to do everything perfectly and to take every opportunity, even if I felt an opportunity was not "right" for me.  They exerted a lot of control over me.  There was no attention paid by them to my internal processing and/or intuition.

 In a similar way, your mother is pressuring you while you are packing.  When my parents would pressure me I learned to say to myself and sometimes to them that I am taking life "one day at a time." And that is how I learned to give myself the space I needed.  Neutral responses rather than oppositional responses took less energy and felt less negative.  It is important to focus on what you need and want for yourself and forget about what others would choose for you. - C

Dream Interpretation / Re: Vacation/Ex/Facing my Mom
« on: June 15, 2017, 07:44:38 AM »
I had a similar relationship and similar dreams about my father.  Given his parenting style, all the feelings in my dreams, and yours, could be seen as natural.  Accepting all the positive and negative feelings I had and that I had previously buried toward him were part of my healing.  People do the best with what they were given.

Your dreams may be highlighting for you some negative feelings that you might have been afraid to look at in yourself.  Exploring these will help you heal.  Your wanting your mother to live would seem to imply that you have not and do not want to kill your attachment to her.  The kind of and quality of attachment you have to her is, as you are an adult now, is up to you.  If she died, you might  feel angry and blame her for controlling you or taking any control or participation away from you by dying.

It might help to explore your feelings, thoughts and intentions with a trusted friend or therapist.

I also found the book "Toxic Parents" to be very helpful.

Dream Interpretation / Re: Stuck on an Image
« on: May 13, 2017, 09:59:45 PM »
Thank you Tony...love the story!  And Thank You ElizVanZee...my interpretation was similar.

Dream Interpretation / Re: Stuck on an Image
« on: May 11, 2017, 04:07:04 PM »
Thank you Tony!  This will be really helpful.  My best intuition...or most correct...is usually based on fear and being in protection mode.  It is usually pretty accurate.  Finding my intuition based on the positive is not so easy.

And Happy Birthday dear one!

Dream Interpretation / Stuck on an Image
« on: May 07, 2017, 03:24:02 PM »
I look down at my right leg and it looks skinnier than it really is.  I am possibly wearing a support stocking or my skin is folded around my knee.  Instead of a knee I see a big black eye looking up at me...it looks round like a cow's eye...so I think the leg might be a cows leg.  Lately though I have had a few dreams with the eye of a black horse.

Before the image came up I heard "The baby is collapsing into the lap."

Questions about dreams / Re: wise dreams.
« on: May 04, 2017, 04:40:45 AM »
I am thinking that you might have met yourself and that the "we" is about your own duality.

Dream Interpretation / Re: Drive
« on: April 29, 2017, 07:40:51 PM »
Thank you Tony...your comments have given me some things to work on.

Dream Interpretation / Drive
« on: April 27, 2017, 07:25:19 AM »
I am driving on a highway in the fast lane on the right, but not too fast.  On my left, I see a gold car with a woman driving ahead of me.  As I speed up and am parallel to her, I look at her and see myself.  Up ahead I see the road curving to the left and on the right another highway with cars going in the opposite direction.

Next I walk towards a long buffet table of food.  It looks like Indian food and I take a little of the different foods I like.  I walk past a two person booth.  On the right a dark boy and on the left a dark older male.  The latter does not have a lot on his plate and I ask "did you not get enough to eat?" and I give him some of my food and he starts to eat it.  The boy on the right says "my father did not want me to drive."

On my way out I stop at the hostess or host table as I see a small container of shiny silver jewelry.  I touch the jewelry and look at the pieces and walk away leaving it there.

Next I am walking out of the buffet room, I can feel the boy behind me.  We walk outdoors and then I am driving.  On my left a large wooden building with stained glass windows.  The boy asks "what is that?".  I say "that is the BaHai....we will have to go there someday."

(I know of the Bahai faith and that it might also mean brother).

I am not sure but I feel like the dream is about my father not wanting me to control my own direction/life...that some men are also treated like that by their fathers...I lost myself letting others drive me...their will to power over others...yet I have also been guilty of that.  Power struggle.  I like being alone now...not in that struggle.  Anything you might be able to add would be appreciated Tony.

Dream Interpretation / Re: dream abandonment
« on: April 24, 2017, 11:52:49 AM »
The change in your dream might be part of the process of grieving the loss of your daughter.  Having a daughter you had continued the female lineage, so to speak and now that she is passed you may be feeling less of a connection to your own mother.  That would seem natural.

In the first dream, you not being in touch with your mother seemed to be your choice and in the second, hers.  As I have gotten older, I have had to grieve a loss of control, which was really only an illusion in the first place.

If you have the dream again, you might notice how it changes.


Greetings / Re: Rigor
« on: April 24, 2017, 11:22:33 AM »
I often use dreams as a way to pose questions to myself.  For example, if I had your dream, I might ask myself if there is some area of my body or life that I feel dead or lifeless in.  Or too stiff, as in taking everything too seriously.  Maybe I need to feel more or have more fun.  We can also procrastinate or get stuck making a choice, so it might also refer to that.  I learn a lot by questioning myself.

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