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Topics - Xochitl

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Dream Interpretation / RE: conjuring my daughter?
« on: January 17, 2014, 07:31:04 PM »
Dear Tony,

Happy new year!  I hope it has been a wonderful one for you thus far and will continue to be.

Many sychronicities happening in my life recently...and I have a question about possible meaning of a dream I had last night.  Just before bed I had done an angel guidance reading and received the Angel of Dreams.  I thought that strange as I hadn't asked anything to do with dreams. 

I had a very restless night with much worry.  But during a moment when I was finally able to fall asleep, I had a short dream where I conjured my daughter.  I don't actually have a daughter in real life (could have but that's another story...) but here she was grown, like teenage, and now that I think of it, this is the age she would have been if she had been born.  (I don't know her gender but I always thought of her as a she.)  I was holding something in my hand like maybe crystals (?), something circular and flat, disk-like, that fit in my hand.  I was circling some kind of tiny branch with dried leaves around it (sage?) and she appeared, solid but still floating and an apparition.  She looked like La Virgen de Guadalupe but in shades of blue garments like the Virgin Mary from other images.  She had no real energy.  Just as she appeared, I heard a huge pop like the sound of a bag popping mixed with the sound of a huge bolt of electrical current like when a large electrical source suddenly shorts out.  I felt scared and woke up all in the same moment with the sound.

My blanket had fallen off the bed but it's so soft, I don't know how it could have made that sound.

Do you have any ideas about what this could mean?

Thank you!

peace, light, love,


Dear Tony and forum friends,

Snakes have visited me yet again in a dream!  I have searched resources online and here at DreamHawk for help but I really would like some guidance as to what these could be trying to tell me.  I feel they are a message of some kind because last night before sleeping, I asked the angels to send me an answer regarding an additional teaching job that I have the opportunity to apply for.  I have actually been praying to *stop* teaching at university and to be able to devote my energies to *finally* getting my art/design business to a completely self-supporting state instead of always trying to supplement (and thereby diverting energy) with teaching which I find incredibly draining and emotionally difficult.  But this position is in my field and a perfect fit and could help with some money problems.  I don't know what to do.

So I dreamed of two snakes.  They visited just before I awoke this morning.  They weren't doing anything, just laying near me.  I don't have a sense of whether they were on the ground.  It was in a non-dimensional dream space and all I feel is that they were to my right.  I had the feeling they were clearly a message to me, not part of a dream story.  They were bright and beautiful and friendly, calm, just like the energy of the snakes in my last dream but more directly friendly.  One was white with orange creamsicle color diamonds and seemed to be more prevalent, dominant, though not sure why because it was just a little larger (closer?) as the other and wasn't doing anything but just being next to me.  Maybe because it was closer to me...  (Corn snake?  Fluorescent milk snake?)  The other was white with green diamonds.  Both super bright, almost neon, and slick, fresh looking.  Thick bodies like constrictors and though they were curled up next to each other, if stretched out they'd probably be at least six feet long (5-6 inch thick) so they were substantial.

What could the angels be trying to tell me?  I just want to know if I should go for this additional teaching job even if it means I will have little time to devote to my art (especially at a crucial potentially lucrative time just before the holidays).  I need the money but I am tired of not being the completely self-sufficient artist that I dream of being...I would be happier about teaching if I knew how to do it without getting completely depleted on every level...

Thanks in advance for any connections or insights.


Dream Interpretation / Snakes in lush tropical forest
« on: July 29, 2013, 06:25:57 PM »
Dear Tony and friends,

I had a dream last night that I was walking in a lush green tropical forest similar to a place I visited as a child with my family (one of the happy, adventurous family trips) and looked similar to a Dr. Seuss book (also a happy memory), walking alone along a wide dirt path.  Trees tall, hanging vines.  I realized that everywhere in trees, bushes were snakes of all kinds, hanging like vines and entwined within every bush.  They weren't on the road, just enmeshed in the greenery, almost lazily and happily like playful energies.  I was stressed when I started to realize they were everywhere, like when you get caught in a spider web, not really so scared (there was a friendly air) but I knew that they could be dangerous.  I was more afraid of getting tangled up in them than I was of getting bitten.   

Recently I have been going through immense transformation, trying to push transformation and de-clutter and move past a feeling of stagnation in my career and love life and also deal with some new family situations/reunions that have been wonderful and distressing.  I have been doing a lot of spirit work and praying, trying to reconfigure how I see myself (often negative) and remove blockages to wealth and peace.  I asked the angels to send me a message in my dream, a friendly one, not something to scare me.

I am open to spirit guides speaking to me through dreams and in the last month have had another one with a large multi-colored snake (light teal, bright red, beige) that was also not harmful.  I know we are in the year of the snake and also I am in the process of trying to let go of someone I love dearly who is born in the year of the snake with whom there have been issues of trust.  Many of my concerns stem from feeling that I am out of place in this city where I have been for years and also out of place/not supported by the people/groups with whom I originally aligned myself.  Overall, nowhere/no one to turn to.  Yet the snakes were....friendly?....or rather, they were just doing what snakes do.  The feeling was that they were just hanging out, not really paying attention to me.  The danger was that I was in *their* territory or that the only danger was if *I* got myself tangled in them.  Otherwise, they were just doing what snakes do, enjoying the beautiful environment.  It felt fresh.  At the same time, there was a pretty clear, wide dirt road running through and the trees were tall so the area around where I was walking was clear, not easy to get tangled with the snakes, and clearly an environment that was also for humans, not like I was infringing on their territory, just that one was aware in that space how much nature was in charge.

Thank you for any insights or guidance on what this could mean.

Peace, light, love,


Dream Interpretation / Sand flies bite palm, refugees in W. Africa
« on: March 16, 2013, 04:10:51 PM »
Dear Tony,

I had a dream last night with a few things that stood out and I'm hoping for some guidance.

I was in W. Africa and we were in a long guesthouse with many rooms and a common open-air corridor that had a lot of enamel buckets for water and dark wooden tables like found in rural areas.  Concrete, dark as with age and use.  There were a lot of refugees coming through, arriving in groups of maybe 20 each day, a lot of kids.  We were trying to find places for everyone, maybe I was a refugee, too, but had been there a long time?  I was in the middle...had some responsibility as a caretaker but also not the one "in charge"...  I saw a group of children of all ages walking single file following one of the other caretakers, singing along the grassy park that bordered the guesthouse.  It was strange because the grass was so perfect and I associate that with parks in U.S. where there is enough water to sustain that kind of manicured lawn, also usually such parks for privileged, not common folk.  I saw some other children taking a bath in a beautiful concrete "tub" set into the edge of the compound overlooking an incredible landscape.  I peeked in to make sure they were okay and felt like I was eavesdropping so I left.  I thought about how the landscape was like a priceless view and how the poor in rural areas often have access but then lose to rich....(I love landscapes and am very soothed by them whether rural or city...)  I checked in on another room and saw a man sleeping alone, exhausted.  I thought it was okay that he wasn't sharing the room (there weren't nearly enough for everyone) because he was so tired and it was also during the daytime. 

I was walking in the corridor and a sand fly (large for its species) bit me on the palm of my left hand (on Mount of Venus).  It really hurt and as I was trying to brush it away, another one came and bit me right next to the other one.  I could see them both on my palm as I looked down.  The pain from the second one was terrible, affected my whole arm.  And it was like it inserted its barbed tongue into my hand and then was stuck but it wanted to stay there stinging me, almost a vindictive energy from the fly who seemed bigger than his friend.  I tried to pick it off or smash it or do something to stop the terrible burning sensation, afraid if I smashed it would make his barbed tongue stay in my hand, like a piece of glass, when you move it, it just hurts more and more and causes more damage.  I woke up from the pain.

I can offer some information about my waking life but I don't want to alter the symbols....I have been going through a very sad breakup with someone much older than me who believes in a much less attached way of being in relationship than I do....I have been trying to let go but feel there has been no closure.  I have been in pain but also learning a lot about myself in the healing process.  Also, I was raised in W. Africa and the scene in the dream related a lot to my parents' life work of helping others.  I have been studying the heart chakra and trying to meditate on the color green....  An earlier part of the dream I had been visiting a college friend who lives far away and with whom relations have been distant and strained.  We had always dreamed about where we would be at 40 and then she forgot my birthday. 

Anyway....just some thoughts....Thank you for any guidance on this.  Thank you for the beauty you bring with your beautiful and amazing site.

Dream Interpretation / RE: cobras and whales
« on: September 06, 2012, 06:35:13 PM »
Dear Tony (and friends),

I am hoping for some guidance on a recent dream.  I was on a beach by the ocean and the view I had in the dream was looking out of my own eyes (as opposed to seeing it/myself from above, etc.)  It was a grey, cloudy day, no rain but one of those semi-misty days, overcast.  (I tend to really like that color of sky.)  The ocean was grey and water churning up some big, deep waves in places.  Water was deep.  I was looking out to the water and could see my younger brother (looked like he was age 10--he is now in his 30s) out in the water with someone else, could just see upper part of their bodies and little heads, off in distance, in water though somehow they were standing up so it must not have been so deep? 

To the left I saw the tail of what I believe was a humpback whale, grey and huge.  I was worried only because of the size in comparison to my brother and the other person--their heads looked like dots comparatively.  But I could see/sense/feel that my brother was excited to see the whale--we all were.  It felt harmless and beautiful.  He turned toward it in the water, like "Oh look!"  Then another whale tail appeared to the upper right of where my brother and the other person were, and the tail flapped over them and put them under the water and I didn't see them anymore.  I wonder now why I wasn't more upset because didn't that mean they were drowned by the whale? 

But I was concerned with what I saw to my right on the beach:  a beached whale--think it was the same one--*split in half* as if it had been snapped!  Whitish-pink guts spilling out, cracked in half like a wishbone.  I was so upset by the gore and felt that it was my fault (maybe?) the whale had died.  It looked like an attack; this was not something that could have happened naturally like that.  Deliberate.  Then again, dead it could not harm anyone (such as my brother).

In the same dream, I was on a dusty path and saw a large cobra in front of me maybe about 6-10 feet away.  It looked like it was real but huge and also kind of like a drawing of a cobra.  It bit someone who was ahead of me, I couldn't see them but I saw it lunge and bit and the person died.  Then it was hovering in the air with only about one loop, maybe two coils in its body.  There was a second cobra to my right, out of eyesight at first, but it appeared to take the place of the first one.  They were like twins, perhaps aspects of each other, related?  I wasn't so scared as long as I kept my distance but I kept in mind that it had killed someone just a little while before.

I would appreciate any guidance you may have on this.  I've recently been going through a lot of difficulty in my career (stress about whether I should be doing this at all, whether I am good enough, why inter-personal relationships and interactions are so stressful and often unsuccessful).  Also stress around family with my dad and brother, feeling I can never be good enough or make up for mistakes of the past, but also angry that he seems to judge me and forgets things like my 40th birthday (but texts on the same day with some inane comment).  We used to be "twins" in a sense but he has made it clear that we are no longer close and largely to do with unspoken things that I have done wrong.  Also having concerns in a love relationship.

So maybe this info helps, maybe not...

Thank you!  Peace, light, love

Dream Interpretation / RE: spider nest and mutation dreams
« on: December 28, 2011, 06:01:06 PM »
Dear Tony,

I'm wondering if you or anyone else here might have some insight into a short dream I just had recently.  There is another related one that happened also with spiders in the same location which I'll mention first in case you think it has any bearing on the recent one.

It took place outside of a small restaurant in the Northeast U.S. (a part of the country I consider to be "home"), mountains in the distance, a peaceful location and similar to a place I worked for many years.  I had a dream some months ago that I was getting out of a pickup truck in the gravel parking lot at this same location and almost ran into a huge (2 feet oval/sphere) spider nest that was hollow and spun very solidly.  (Note: I do not drive but here I was getting out of the drivers seat from an old dark color Chevy, the kind I always said I'd buy if I moved out West.)

The web looked like a birds nest, oval, 1-2 feet diameter with a hole on the side (like for letting birds in except it was for the spider).  A couple of small brownish spiders came out and I was looking at the "nest/web" because it was so beautifully done (I am a sculptor by trade) but was warning someone else not to get caught in it when they got out of their car.  Fascinated, knowing it was somehow not "out to get me" but it's nature (i.e. web, spider bites) necessitated being scared, protective.

So recently, I was in the same location again in a dream and dreamed that I saw a black spider crawling on the sidewalk and it zapped out it's tongue and ate a bug.  The spider itself was maybe about an inch big but it's tongue--which just looked like a long streak of black--was easily eight times it's length.  (It reminded me of those frogs that dart out their tongues really fast to eat bugs.)  I wasn't really afraid of it but I recognized that it was kind of aggressive with the tongue and all.  Then my younger sister and I were looking down on the sidewalk and we were watching what I thought was the same spider except that it looked completely different.  It was larger--maybe 2 inches diameter--brown, spotted and ridged (like camouflage for a rocky locale) and reminded me of one of those seashells that is a textured sphere with hole in the top.  So then we looked in amazement as it grew a whole other body of the same shape, like when cells mutate and go from one to two.  Maybe some connection with breasts?  (A very, very close relative died of breast cancer.)  It was just sitting there strangely, alive but like two hollow bodies made of one.  I was afraid--because it looked pretty wild and crusty--but we just watched in fascination and then I woke up.

The dream felt very significant.

Thank you (and all!) for any insights.


Dream Interpretation / Re: gold coins
« on: November 29, 2011, 04:07:20 AM »

I stumbled upon your site and really appreciate the way that you write about dreams.  I am hoping you might shed some light on a dream I had last night that I feel is very important.  It might be interesting to note that I moved the direction of my bed recently and since then, I went from having no dreams (or rarely) to having vivid dreams every night as I used to all of my growing up years.

Some years ago (7), I became friends with a well-known and very personable art collector in the city where I live.  He is well-respected in the art community, has purchased and supported my work by coming to museum exhibitions, and has become a friend, someone with whom I share a birthday month as well as similar views on the world.  He recently invited me to work on a project at the building where he lives.  Also, I just did a feng shui exercise last night where I put a picture of a waterfall in my front entrance way to increase wealth luck and have been meditating a lot on wealth, abundance, as well as my desire to help others (homeless, veterans and women's shelters) and dealing with inherited guilt around acquisition of money.  Also, much of my recent work has involved actual floating gold pieces from the ceiling--purposefully created as a meditation on abundance for all--and I recently had a show where there were some issues with the installation and I felt very disappointed by the art world.  So!  That is the framework that may provide extra insight into the symbols in this dream.

In the dream, the collector and I were standing in the 2-3 story lobby of a stately old building, like a bank or government building built in the early 1900s (a period of time that I find fascinating and have been watching a lot of prohibition-era type films and t.v.) with marble walls and floors and lots of sculpted detailing on the cornices and pillars.

There were people around, going about their business, paying us little mind, some I think in period dress--the men in hats and suit coats at least--while he and I were in regular casual clothing as usual.  Just he and I were standing around some velvet stantions (as used at museum shows or theater events to block off areas) located in the central area of the lobby which were arranged around a pile of old coins.  The pile of coins took up probably about 5 feet diameter (?) and the pile at that point was maybe two feet high.

It was understood that this pile was an accumulation of coins that people were dropping by to donate/add to the pile.  The coins were mostly tarnished and were from people's own personal collections, stuff they had inherited or that was collecting dust in their attics but they knew there was some value.  The feeling I got was that they said, hey, let's give a coin or two to the pile, watch it grow and maybe if you can find use for this old thing my grandmother gave me, so much the better.  All very amiable.  Like how people give old fur knowing it has value but knowing they themselves won't do anything with it so they give it to the artist.

People were coming in an giving us coins to add to the pile and we were just kind of watching it; at one point, he spoke with some people--higher ups?--about another project perhaps?  Then we were just talking, hanging out.   Then the collector came over to me and gave me a really shiny bright gold coin that was large, maybe the size of a large chocolate foil coin except it was solid gold and it had the number 23 on it embossed.  And he was excited as if saying wow!  look at this!  I knew that meant $23 million dollars we had won or that was coming our way.  And he gave it to me almost as if he didn't really care to keep it one way or another, was more excited by the fact of the coin, and then I ran across the sandy street (California? a place I long to move and have family) to go up to a homeless shelter on the sandy hill where I was helping out and ate lunch with the residents.  I was running and my pants were baggy and was nervous that I'd drop the $23 million dollar coin on the road or lose it.

In a later dream, I was helping an acquaintance (not from real life) get on a bus with her child and I was then trying to get off and got off later so I overpaid by a dollar and could have gotten it back but I left the $1.  Then felt guilty because that $1 meant a lot to the woman and child.  I berated myself because I knew that at some point I might need that $1 and shouldn't be so flippant with my money.  I went in search of crushed ice and coconut water to add to the juice in my to-go cup, walked through my old neighborhood (actual) and figured I didn't need to spend for the ice.  I could buy coconut milk at the store and crush ice in my own blender at home.

I would so appreciate any thoughts on this dream, especially the first part.  I know it's significant....

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