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Messages - duckle

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Dream Interpretation / Re: Poison and salt, dog love, death
« on: September 03, 2016, 12:36:30 AM »
Thanks, but....What is the dream saying about it?  The salt symbolism?  Salt from dad, salt to the dog, not really poison,...but, what?  Does my subconscious say something about the outcome?

Dream Interpretation / Poison and salt, dog love, death
« on: September 01, 2016, 09:10:34 PM »
My dad gives me capsules of poison called "sodium perchloride", in case I need to take the "easy" way out, which I decide not to take.  But, later, because of bad circumstances, I give it to my dog, Momi. First his eyes turn neon orange, and I become terrified of what I've done to him, then his teeth all fall out and it seems some bones come out, too. I am mortified, babbling that I love him and am sorry and would never want to hurt him.  It's like a horror show or haunted house kind of fear. But, then I begin to realize he isn't going to die, and I wonder what I've done and how to fix it. I wake up, still scared, but realizing it was only a dream.
Possible related facts:  I caregave for my dad when he was terminally ill and hurt my back catching his fall, rendering me disabled and in constant pain, which has lead, years later, to my having nearly exhausted my savings (denied disability, etc.).  I have been wondering what to do about my beloved dogs, in case I can't find a way to survive.  My conscience is clear; I have always been a hard worker and really am disabled and really have tried everything I can think of or afford to get out of this mess. Sept 1 was my deadline to begin trying to find them a good home, via the internet, but I am still trying to dig up the courage to face it.  If I can't, I am wondering if I will have to have them put down. The dog in the dream, Mo, is very sensitive and, about 3 yrs ago, when I told him I might eventually have to give them away to new parents, he began to cry out loud and with real tears, only calming down after a neighbor held him for about 20 minutes and reassured him that I had taken it back.  All of my dogs are either elderly or disabled and I feel the same sort of horror in real life as the dream presented, when considering the options.  I had a friend once who was good at deciphering dream puns, so I looked up "sodium perchloride". There isn't any such thing, but then I thought maybe it was the dream's way of getting around my thinking of table salt, when salt was the real meaning of the dream....as it has a 1:1 ratio of sodium to chloride (one sodium PER each chloride atom).

Dream Interpretation / Spider kills bird
« on: December 11, 2015, 08:50:37 PM »

I dreamed that my mother was driving a sedan, with me in the passenger seat, and, I think, perhaps, my dad in the back.  We were leaving a parking garage and, since she had dementia (in real life, she did have dementia and I tried, but could not get her license permanently revoked....I suppose that this reflects real life events, symbolically?)....she drove through concrete barriers surrounding a big square hole in the upper floor we were on, through which a car could fall several floors down, to the ground level).  As we sailed through the air, I thought, "We're going to die."; but she had accelerated enough before that that we just broke through the opposite barrier and ended up safely on the floor, again.  After that, we parked somewhere and she was going to be taken away (not sure if arrested or committed....which she actually was, in real life).  There were people standing around, waiting and doing things, and then I saw a large light brown spider, on the wall, or on a beam of some sort, catching a bird with it's legs around the bird's neck, and, although there was a struggle and the bird was much larger, it was clearly about to kill the bird (also light brown, like a small yard bird or song bird).  Then, my dogs woke me up; so I didn't get to see the rest.

Would it help to add that in real life, I am in dire straights, due to having taken a leave to care for my terminally ill dad, but ending up getting a back injury and denied disability....all the while being tortured by my mentally ill mother, who beat my father, but the cops didn't want to arrest her (they 5150'd her one time, and she was "certified" mentally ill and dangerous, but let go, and then they still wouldn't do it again)....so, it is possible I might actually end up homeless now, despite having once been firmly well employed, and I am not well enough to survive that.....to me, and this might be way off, it seems portentous....but of what outcome, I'm not sure.

Dream Interpretation / Re: Part of a long dream
« on: October 02, 2014, 09:25:11 PM »
"You will find answers to your questions."

Let's hope so.

Since you were so helpful with this one, may I ask for your assistance with a whole category of similar dreams I've had repeatedly for at least the past couple of years?  I'm on some pain meds for a back injury which make my dreams more unpleasant than they used to be, but that doesn't effect the interpretation, does it?  Once or twice was ok, but since, other than the obvious symbols and points, I just don't get it, the  - um, 50 of them - have been pretty annoying.  I've even scolded myself before bed, saying that they had to be less obscure - like, "Let's have a narrator, like the Ancient Greek plays did."...no luck.

So, I live in San Diego, and grew up and lived along the beach for years (as well as all around the country, at times) ; my dad was a surfer and I have one of those deep connections with the ocean surfers talk about.....and the dream is always some combination of traveling by car to various beach towns up to Central Calif (which, to give you an idea, would be about a six hour drive, from start to finish).  The towns involved are:  Laguna Beach, an imaginary place between Santa Barbara and LA, and Santa Barbara.  Sometimes my parents (my dad died in Aug '13 and my mom has been in psych wards and nursing homes, since.) go, and sometimes not.  Sometimes, old friends I'm out of touch with go along.  Sometimes, other things, like distant relatives, play a role.

In Laguna and Santa Barbara, it's always the beach, houses on the sand, waterways/inlets/narrows (we don't have narrows in reality, here..except in a few small spots like Huntington Beach.  They did have them in Alaska where I lived, though.), and the usual beach town mix of upscale and funky houses along grassy borders/parks along the shores of the narrows between the beach and town.  In the earlier versions of this dream, which goes back really about 2 yrs, I was just visiting and traveling, or looking for housing, or hanging out for the day or eating at cafes before leaving to return to San Diego.  There's a certain freeway intersection that doesn't really exist, where the N. Going side forks into two and the side going South just curves off to the coast.  The intersection area is undeveloped, except for one exit with restaurants we revisit in repeated dreams (a crowded breakfast place at a point travelers would want to stop, next to a plant nursery), and about 15 minutes south of there, there's a place for folks going South to get off and go to a beachy outdoor mall with a Hagen Daaz (I haven't eaten at one of those in decades, but I used to sometimes eat at one in high school, near the actual beach), from which a paved bike/foot path near the road in a grassy, hilly, beach-side park runs along the coast into LA (much to far to actually walk).  In a few dreams, I went there with my parents and/or an old friend, and walked south by foot, running into the usual Venice types - pot heads and craft sellers and such). Later, the dream/s gets more strange and pointed.

Sometimes, I'm at the beach to swim, sometimes, we're boating or on the upper floor of a tall beach house, with a great view, sometimes, we're walking on the sand.  The waves are usually way too high (20'-50'), and there are huge, leviathonish, wales and sharks of every type swimming in large numbers close to the shore.  One can easily see them and even has to avoid being eaten or accidentally killed by them, or at least, has that fear of being eaten by them, by stepping into the water.  Even the ones with baleen seem threatening. It's always considered rare or unique and very scary, even kind like grim omens. 

Before the leviathans took over the dreams, they were intermittent and not really the main focus, and there was in a few dreams a museum/gallery built into the cliff with a cave entry.  It always had the same kind of entry, with one or two subway-like toll machines with the rotating arms; it cost about a quarter to get in.  Inside, there were many rooms of interesting craft/folk art, docents, and also a large craft/art shop.  I frequented the place so often that the workers knew me, dream to dream.  Over time, the other characters and places have lost focus and now it's mainly just the beach, large waves, and people in awe of the scary monsters and omens.

In general, I've found that water means something spiritual, and I suppose an invasion of scary sea monsters would mean something.... psychologically scary?  These dreams are troubling in nature and because they just won't stop happening.


Dream Interpretation / Re: Part of a long dream
« on: September 30, 2014, 07:11:26 PM »
Hi, Tony, thanks for the help!  I followed the link and tried identifying with the bf, and some things that were so obvious that I had to laugh struck me. 

First, my spiritual teacher, who was raised Hindu, but became Christian and teaches via a mix of symbols, is from Europe and wears orange often (orange is a color which indicates a cleric of sorts, in Hinduism).  So, the orange has something to do with what I've learned from him or can continue learning from him, or something....since the bf came to see how we might mesh together, I'd say maybe it's about how I'm going to continue learning to live a life in harmony with what I've learned about divine love.  But, other than that it's not back-to-the-land, what does it mean?  In reality, I'm being forced to sell my house and won't be able to buy again in my home state (very expensive), and have been thinking of moving to a small town with a rural feel.  Is it a comment on that? 

Second, I felt the skin design just about doubled his skin surface, and made him very open, in a natural way, to the world around.  He was also very open to me in the dream, very patient, just open to whatever would happen naturally.  So, I guess that could be a comment on how to live with faith:  open, patient, confident and natural, not distressed, as I have been...?

3rd: The complainy friend traveling with him could be a reminder that I find his followers, in general, to be intolerable; so trying to live in close proximity to them is out - But, I already knew that....

In the dream, there was no resolution, so is there no answer offered to me?  Just guidance about staying in faith?

Dream Interpretation / Part of a long dream
« on: September 29, 2014, 10:33:39 PM »
I had met a man in Europe and we had fallen in love in kind of a love at first sight way, but I had had to return home.  He soon came for a visit with a few of his friends; we were to hang around in town for a bit and then travel to a nearby larger city to visit with some of his friends.  The idea was for us to see if we were really compatible, by getting to know each other.  Neither of us tried to make it physical, as we felt we should start "at the beginning", so to speak.  I liked his friends, but on one occasion thought one was kind of complainy (She complained that we were going to the zoo, which was boring to her; but my friends and parents were going, too, so it needed to be a family outing).

We took an RV or camper to the bigger city and stayed at his friends' place, which was more like a rural farm; they were kind of survivalists - not really by hoarding things or weapons, but with the idea that the world economy was going to collapse and it would be wise to develop back-to-the-land skills.  In the dream, I had the same health problems I have in reality - a severe back injury that limits the time I can spend up and about, and a rash from medication.  At one point, the city friends asked why I was subdued and I said that my back hurt, and they recommended some herbal medication which didn't work well.

The outstanding image I have from the dream is of the boyfriend's skin.  It was kind of a light orange color, like kraft American cheese slices when they're wet, and, although it was soft like skin is, it had a different design that human skin really does:  it had regular dips that were like inverted pyramids, about 1/4 inch apart.  It looked as if, if one were to sqeeze it, it would pucker.  But, in the dream, no one gave it a second thought. It only seemed odd to me after I woke up.

Greetings / Hi
« on: September 29, 2014, 09:33:45 PM »
Hi, I just registered.  I've been having months of very intense, similar dreams and have decided to try to get a handle on it.... 

See you in the forums.

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