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Messages - Omega

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166
Dream Interpretation / Re: Assaults
« on: September 07, 2015, 09:26:34 PM »
Hi Tony, interesting you should focus on alcohol. That didn't even cross my mind as a particularly important feature.

Is it correct that the dream elements with most emotional intensity are the most important. It was not clear in my dream descriptions which parts were the most intense for me. The little blond girl was anyway.

Also does the emotion felt over-ride other associations?
Alcohol is a topic I would love to discuss. For now I am immersing myself in your incredible incredible writings.

Thank-you, most appreciated, I have a great deal to digest here. Which I will do and get back to you.

167
Dream Interpretation / Re: Assaults
« on: September 05, 2015, 03:41:09 PM »
I'll just add my next dream briefly. I am packing my last few things into a van in the dark to move (true I am moving) friends are hungover and happy after a party. Someone comes and keys the side of the van, possibly scraping 'fuck you' into the side. I feel this is the energy of everyone who wants me to be unhappy.

Then I am walking holding hands with a guy I know (a real-life romantic interest I couldn't tell whether to trust or not so chose to retreat) he wants me to stay I hesitate, he brings me around outside the house and shows me tables with little china tea-sets to show how he's been improving his place and to buy time, I agree to stay and kiss but stop him going further and he gets a book to read. Next morning we are leaving the house. There is a stranger with us in the hallway, also leaving it seems, with us, he is smoking a pipe but it seems a bit odd for a young man. It's raining. I have two umbrellas. I give the black umbrella to the man with the pipe and keep the yellow one. I walk out and the two guys have disappeared now, instead is a young blond haired girl around 4yo and a black girl around 6yo. It's not raining any more but bright. The are both smoking cigarettes and have a rather frightening adult and very hard demeanour, mostly the blond girl. I panic about the neighbours seeing them smoking at such a ridiculously young age and being girls too,  I call to them but they ignore me and they keep talking and talking and ignoring me, I run over and clasp my hand over the blond child's mouth. I grab both cigarettes and put them out. In 'being' the blond child - this is what she says ' I smoked before the black girl. I'm harder, she's older but doesn't really get it, the danger. You can shut me up, take my cigarette, it makes no difference, I'm done my life is already over' The black girl says 'I'm sick. My skin is sick. I don't know what to do, so I copy my little sister. '
I'm pretty certain I am the blond child.

168
Dream Interpretation / Re: Assaults
« on: September 04, 2015, 07:55:20 PM »
Tony thank-you for your reply so much, also for sharing that timescale with me.
It's an incredibly lonely place to be, to try face up to something no one wants to know about, least of all me.

I don't know what to do with this information, only to say nothing to anyone, and hope my dreams can guide me. It's like holding a poison that is killing me, but will injure everyone if I share it - but at least I'm finally starting to know some element of the truth - and my whole life experience is starting to make sense. Meanwhile I just use huge amounts of energy keeping up the appearance of normal.

Last night part of a dream was a car race and accident, one driver had drowned in this horrible grey sludgy river, the other was weeping in anguish holding on to a pole beside the river. In 'being the thing ' I felt both were me.  One killed to keep the truth quiet and allow people to carry on as normal, the other in agony due becoming aware of that death and it's why and having to live on. The next part I went to a counsellor for help, first of all a whole room of people in the waiting room started answering my questionnaire (about me), so I went outside to stop them interfering, then I got to the counsellor, who was crying and I ended up consoling her.. (A typical feature of my life, those I sought help from, shutting me up by forcing a role reversal, then using me to meet their rather more petty needs.. ) I ended up in a bar with this pretty girl who'd got engaged and told her it was time her boyfriend bought us some drinks as we had gotten drinks in already. She had a really delicate pretty band of diamonds as an engagement ring but was inexpressive and clearly felt no need to make any effort with anything.  She seemed to represent a world I'd been locked out of, where I have had to hold on to the cliff edge with my nails to survive, she just leaned against the bar, daydreaming, knowing she would be looked after.

I am reading what you recommend and if I can bear it, will try being X

Well dream world I need all the help I can get - I  place all my trust in thee.

Thank you again so much Tony.

169
Dream Interpretation / Re: Assaults
« on: August 29, 2015, 10:23:48 PM »
Thank-you for your reply Tony. Much appreciated. I will read all of these and reflect and respond then.

Meanwhile I will just say I do work extensively with my dreams, being the thing etc.. So I don't usually see people as playing themselves. This case is different for the following reason.

I have come to the conclusion that I need to know the truth in order to heal. When I know the truth then all this unconscious repressed material can begin to be integrated. So I have been asking and asking my dreams - tell me the Truth about my childhood, tell me if my suspicions are true and tell me who did it.  That is why in this case I believe X may be playing themselves - if this is the case - well I've a whole bag of lies & manipulation to confront.

170
Dream Interpretation / Re: Assaults
« on: August 27, 2015, 09:16:49 AM »
I'd just like to add it was my left palm that the boy with the sword injured, blood just spurted out in quantity. The left palm entered my dreams late last year and has been a recurring theme..

171
Dream Interpretation / Assaults
« on: August 22, 2015, 01:41:18 PM »
Hi Tony, this is my first post. I had a dream recently. It was very dark, I was young, X was pulling me towards him, we were clothed, but he was pulling me towards his groin. I was mute paralysed. Then I'm older he has his hand on my left leg I ask him to take it off, he won't, I use both my hands and try pry it off but he is so much stronger than me, I start screaming 'take your hand off me, take your fucking hand off me' (this is very new in these attack dreams ..always up to now I've been mute and also often paralysed) Eventually he does, but is in no way ashamed and more condescending.. A sort of 'maybe not this time' attitude. The dream continued to a somewhat better place, but it's too long to write.

 I've experienced a lot if assaults as an adult, and have been dealing with all this recently. But chronic pain has directed me to dreamwork to try find out why the pain continues despite looking at and starting to process these experiences. In the dream his hand was on my left leg, and I currently have a lot of pain in my left leg.

Any help with this appreciated. This dream has been preceded by many dreams that seemed to relate to adult experiences. But I did in the past year have a dream of a much younger boy stabbing me with a sword and I was frantically cleaning up the blood, to hide it, no-one told him to stop. In both this dream and the one outlined above a shadowy mute old woman was present in the background. I tried to work with that dream element, but it was very dead and I couldn't get anything. Part of me has been expecting some sort of child abuse revelation, but I am very shocked it would be X (of my recent dream). Can I rely on the dream information? - I read on unclesirbobby that Real Emotional Nightmares - the dreams are less symbolic, they will be very clear what they are about and people play themselves..

Another recent feature of my attack dreams are very nasty young females who prey on me and seem to really hate me for no reason I understand.

As a teenager I used to have a recurring nightmare - in the dream it was like my spirit body, my self, was being sucked out of my physical body by this huge force. I would desperately try to stay in my body, my spirit body would use its spirit hands to hold on, at the mid point of my body, as if clinging to the edge of a cliff.

My life is constricted by physical pain, and the emotions of these dreams. I want to heal and get on with my life. I meditate daily for years.

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