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« on: June 04, 2016, 08:34:18 AM »
Thank you Tony, especially about the comment about alcohol changing consciousness and not taking what someone says who might be drunk as truth. My mother did have a problem with alcohol sometimes, but so did my Dad. My role in the family probably had more to do with my mother's drinking than my father, which I had not considered before. She would say and do terrible things, black out, and not remember it.
It was interesting that the figure said "your mother" and not "my wife" as if it was my responsibility. My father also told me that "women are on earth to serve men." I "policed" my mother and my siblings, in a way, for my father...not realizing until I was in my 30's that he was always cheating on my mother and in my 40's that he was an alcoholic. My father blamed everything on her. I think I internalized that...why bother speaking up when they will blame me anyway?
I think I am having the dream now as I am in a similar situation with my housemate and am having to really separate and say no from her initiating any dependency or blame on me.
Recent dream images have included me being a giant and falling into a puddle of black water, a black snake almost bit my heart, but I lifted up right elbow, very muscular arm, and flung it away. I was thrilled, isn't that silly?, to see a human colored elbow as most of the time when I see a person or body they are grey, white or black.
Another dream image of a mandala, flesh colored, bright yellow and bright green.
Another of a bright yellow sun and a Christian cross laid on top. The sun's edges had teeth, like on an award ribbon. The image was so bright it was almost blinding.
Feeling strong.
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