i know dreams are the door to your unconscious state of being. i know they have meaning, and i am trying to understand what my unconscious is trying to get my conscious to acknowledge. my reality is: i have had an on and off relationship with i guy i fell very much in love with, but due to circumstances in our lives we couldn't control, i think we both came to a realization that we can't work right now. he recently started dating a girl, and i don't know how i feel. i have so many emotions going on that i feel numb. we haven't talked in long time, and us being best friends has become distanced. my dreams: dream1; i have dreamed that something was coming after me to kill me. my mother was trying to keep me safe, and it hurt her. after she got hurt i knew that it was going to get me, and the only thing i could think of to do, i wanted to do, was to text him i love you before i died. he texted me back asking what was going on, and i told him i was dying. after that i woke up. i remember feeling panic and fear and like i was being suppressed. the feelings lingered after i awoke. dream2; i was dreaming i was in this neighborhood to get something. the dream felt kind of familiar, like a reccuring one from my childhood, but elements had changed. then it changed into me going to a party for the guy in my reality. as i was going into the building for the party, i was attacked by this guy who wanted to use me to get inside and hurt people. my only instinct was to scream his name because i knew he would protect me. he came out of the building and fended him off and dragged me inside. this part happen two or three times. i ran around getting everyone inside and locking the doors, but he almost captured me again, and he locked something on my arm. the scenery changed and i was in this outdoorsy looking hotel. there was a security group down stairs trying to keep us safe. i realized the man had gotten into the building so i went to tell the security he was there. when i filled them in we discovered the device on my arm was a boom. it got really blurry, and then all i remember is the man was just after the security for an injustice done to him. i remember after that going to a place in the hotel that was kinda like a restaurant. the guy i loved was there with his girlfriend and sister. there was music playing and he wanted to dance, but his girlfriend didn't. she sat at a table, not paying any attention to me and him. we started dancing and it was like it was when before her, us being best friends and it was like we were the only two people in the world. after the song was over, i kissed him on the cheek because i owed him a kiss. then i woke up. i felt fear and panic and helplessness. torwards the end i felt a sense of home and feelings i haven't felt in a while. parts of the dream felt like deja vu, like a reccuring dream. : i would really appreciate any help and input. i need help with my nightmares so i can understand, and hopefully have some good dreams and rest.
