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Author Topic: Why Should I?  (Read 3559 times)

Christine

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Why Should I?
« on: June 04, 2015, 03:29:46 AM »
I heard a voice in a dream that said "the house is in the kitchen" and since then have had several dreams taking place in one.

I am in my parents kitchen.  There is a rectangular table...grey man sitting on the left hand side...sitting and doing nothing.  There is a grey girl who is getting something to eat by herself before she goes off to school.  I think she is getting cereal.  I am seriously concerned that she may not have enough to eat.

(I used to pass out all the time in the am when I was little...at school, at events, at church.  I do not remember why).

On the table directly in front of me is a long john plain donut w/glaze on top.  I cut it into bite sized pieces with a butter knife, which is safe for kids to use.  I push the pieces to the left as I cut.  I glance at her and she is looking at the man and saying something to him.

I feel hurt, upset with her and say "Why am I doing this when you are not paying attention (she is not looking at me or what I am doing) and you are talking to someone else?"  I put down the knife, grab my stack of grey papers (for work/) and walk out of the kitchen.

Christine

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Re: Why Should I?
« Reply #1 on: June 04, 2015, 04:01:09 AM »
The word polarities came up in this dream too.

Feeling positive about my instincts regarding what was needed, caring, giving love,  about doing...yet what I was receiving did not feel positive.  Her not looking at me, hot watching what I was doing, not speaking to me and looking to someone who was doing nothing.  This dynamic has played out with a lot of people and situations.  I felt hurt, and used.

The girl in the dream might have been my mother, me, my son, my roommate.

I was also volunteered or voluntold a lot.  Grew up in a fearful environment...always trying to anticipate others needs so that they would not get mad (my parents) or that they would not feel afraid (the siblings).

i had a dream once...instead of feeding people...I should "feed the birds."




Tony Crisp

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Re: Why Should I?
« Reply #2 on: June 05, 2015, 09:43:55 AM »
Christine - The house is in the kitchen could mean that the kitchen is where the family meet, and is the centre of family life. But the centre of you sense of being protected, by family, by the 'home', was shattered.

You can blame it on your parents, but in fact they were or are the result of a long line of people and a cultural background that led to an awful way of living and relating - and you are the result of that. Those convictions and beliefs they lived by are in you and you are trying to meet and change them. In a way you are in the dream expressing something of those attitudes by, "Why am I doing this when you are not paying attention (she is not looking at me or what I am doing) and you are talking to someone else?"  I put down the knife, grab my stack of grey papers (for work/) and walk out of the kitchen."

You like most of us are caught in a form of current, a river that was caused by past events, by people and their beliefs and attitudes, which led to your present situation. In a real sense we are all created by that torrent of events which led to our birth in the body and environment we are now carried along by. We can either be simply carried along by it or we can change its direction. It is bloody hard to do, but it can be done, and each triumph we meet in doing it adds to our strength and alters the future for us and others.

So if possible gradually alter the feelings of being hurt and used, and instead see that we are all in a battle against the very feelings which gave rise to what you have met in your family. Fight the good fight.

You said you had a dream once that ...instead of feeding people...I should "feed the birds."
The people are probably the sort of associations you have with parents and adults in general; the birds are usually about imagination, intuition, the mind, freedom from restraints, thoughts or hidden wishes or hopes, or your longings to move beyond limitations or boundaries, or even love or a lover.
So to feed the birds would be to stop giving energy to the old reactions of hurts and a sense of being used, and instead feeding the uplifting given by your intuition, imagination and feelings of freedom from your old and painful self.

See http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/questions-2/#Victim - http://dreamhawk.com/inner-life/habits/ - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/secrets-power-dreaming/

Tony

Christine

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Re: Why Should I?
« Reply #3 on: June 15, 2015, 07:57:54 AM »
Thanks Tony.  Since thinking about your interpretation,  I've had a few potential conflicts work out very smoothly.  Also a dream with the following image.  A tall woman or female, a blank face, she is wearing a golden crown high on her head.  She has bare shoulders and a chain around her neck with solid gold disk as a pendant.  I look at the disk, expect to see my own face, and see a bright golden light instead.  In the past I had dreams with a short woman wearing a black and white striped crown.  The blank face makes me think of hear no evil, see no evil, speak no evil.  The gold crown might mean no judgement of self or other. Her being tall and the crown makes me think of the Polish Black Madonna.  I am American and Polish. In the golden dream I felt very calm after seeing the light.
« Last Edit: June 15, 2015, 08:50:03 AM by Tony Crisp »

Tony Crisp

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Re: Why Should I?
« Reply #4 on: June 15, 2015, 10:22:45 AM »
Christine - Thank you for putting me in touch with the Polish Black Madonna. I don't know if you realise that it was through the Madonna a path opened for me.

I think a turning point occurred when I was working as a photographer in London at about the age of 25, and was all alone in a darkroom. I had been puzzling about the symbolism of the Virgin Mary, and suddenly felt that it represented the 'virgin mind'. In other words a state of mind that did not hold fast to its convictions or beliefs, but instead was virginal and ready to conceive of the new. In the case of Mary she is shown as a young girl, newly aware of her sexual self, not offering herself to a man, but giving herself without preconceptions and with all her heart and body to the invisible that gives life.

Having realised that - the plates I was developing were now in the fixer and I had time just to be - I wondered what would happen if I myself tried to be just like Mary, offering my being wholeheartedly and virginally to the unseen. Immediately I had images of a young woman I knew vision, and as if a new slide had been put in a projector, an image of a baby with a crown on its head. This was so extraordinary I didn't know what to make of it. But it seemed to be telling me that the daughter of a friend of mine was pregnant and she would give birth to a boy who was a 'special child' - more aware than usual.

About a fortnight later I had to phone the mother of the girl, and after we had finished our business together I asked her if her daughter was pregnant. She immediately laughed and I asked her why the laughter. She said she didn't know if her daughter was pregnant, but she was at the doctor's at that moment to find out. The daughter later gave birth to a son.


The woman with a blank face seems to me to be an expression of your core self which has no marked personality or face and so is also virginal. Again you couldn't see your face is the gold disk but the Light that lights everyone if you do not hide or avoid it. That Light is much more than the face you have associated as yourself. So it shows contact with a transforming influence. See - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/core/

The blank face is indeed the virginal face of the Black Madonna.

Tony
« Last Edit: June 19, 2015, 10:03:55 AM by Tony Crisp »

Christine

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Re: Why Should I?
« Reply #5 on: June 16, 2015, 01:56:48 PM »
Tony,  What a wonderful experience for you.  Thank you for sharing it and your interpretation with me.  Chris