Believe I am being visited by departed

[britweis]

I have had two dreams now where I was visited by my boyfriends passed sister. She passed away almost three years ago, not quite, but I have only been dating him ten months. I am naturally an empathetic person, and I can take on the feelings and burdens of others easily, but I have never met her. My first dream, I was with her. I found out later the outfit she was wearing in my dream (which took me a while to disclose to my boyfriend, feeling anxious about it) was an outfit she wore to a wedding years before. I will try and sum it up in short, but we were in a cement/maze like, open area, grey skies, and there were other people there in this area, but they paid us no mind. We were in the dead center of this place, on two high standing chairs. She looked at me, smiled and was very inquisitive about me. She asked me a lot of questions about myself, and I regret to say I remember what context we spoke, but not the specifics, because i was so focused an insecure on the fact i couldn't understand why she was talking to me and why i was there. Eventually, after a short conversation, she began tearing up and becoming distressed. There is something wrong with me, she said, and she pulled out her left hand that looked diseased and burned. She grew very upset and she disappeared, and I see her , a flying dragon, and the walls around me began to crumble and quake. There are a few more details, but these are the main ones. I felt so strange after this dream, because I didn't feel like I was dreaming in my dream. I knew I was dreaming in my dream, but I did not feel the dream like state that I do sometimes. She was not a part of me. The next dream it was as if I summoned her. I don't know how to explain it. Long story short, we were in a bedroom and she was asleep on the bed. I knew I was in a dream, but I had it in my head that we could all spend the day together. Her brother , her , and I. I lay down on the bed, and I woke her up, and our faces were side by side as she looked at me in the eyes, very real evaluation and just looking at me. She seemed slightly impatient, but I felt so joyful. Eventually she got up after my encouragement and addressed her own death saying she didn't know what happened she just woke up and couldn't reach anyone and no one could reach her. She kept trying to get me to turn on her phone service. She brought me a phone and I asked what kind of phone it was and she said she didn't know, and I asked okay well, what kind of service, again she said she didn't know, she just cant reach anyone and no one has contacted her. blah blah blah, next big thing I had set up this shop, kind of science center wonder thing, and my boyfriend and i were down there looking at the things, he didn't even notice she didn't come with, but i could see her up on the balcony of this shop with the bedroom door open as she paced the railing looking at me, obviously distressed. I knew she couldn't come down, and i woke up. I am now experiencing weird events in my waking life, with things i experienced much more frequently as a kid, and haven't had anything like it since except for a couple of random incidents in my life. I am feeling she is wanting me to help her communicate, or she is saying something to me, and I am just not getting the message. I have never really researched anything like this before, but it is causing me real anxiety. I am trying to accept this is what may be happening, after my last wake life experience was enough to send me into a panic attack. Any help on what some of these symbols might mean tat she has sent me, or what I should do with them would be helpful. This has been the most helpful site I have found so far, and I have been trying to understand and look for answer for a month, but have come up with very little. Thanks anyone for helping and their insight and sorry for any typing errors, I'm afraid I have quick fingers, but careless.

[Tony Crisp]

Britweis – The events you describe in your dream are so exactly like many others where the dead person, never believed that there was an after death state, cannot adjust to the enormous change they are meeting. A big point is her distress about not being able to communicate by her cell phone.

I need to quote from a part of this site about the difficulties we may face in such communications – “So to understand how dreams come about and realise what your dreams are telling you, it can help if you understand that just as your eyes do not directly allow you to see, but nerve impulses are sent to the brain where they are translated into living pictures. Nothing we sense in the world is directly known, but it is all impressions that are translated into a sense of smell, sight, hearing, etc. So the eye receives reflected light from an object that is translated into nervous impulses, which is then received by the brain which translates what are formless nerve impulses into what we feel we see."

So in dreams we tend to put pictures or images collected from everyday experiences to put an interpretation on our formless dreams. We do this because we tend to have an experience of the world based on our body senses, and our dreams and communications from the dead come from a very different environment, so we put it in images and ideas we understand. So when we dream about a dead person communicating with you it can be distorted by your view of what death is – or our associations with the dead person.”
 
Often this produces a mixture of a communications and our own thoughts and realisations. This actually happens when a living person communicates with us, for as they talk we also experience our own thoughts, memories and realisations. But in dreams this is all represented by the scenes we confront and experience.

An example of how your reactions and inner experience influenced your dream, I quote, “Eventually, after a short conversation, she began tearing up and becoming distressed. There is something wrong with me, she said, and she pulled out her left hand that looked diseased and burned. She grew very upset and she disappeared, and I see here, a flying dragon, and the walls around me began to crumble and quake.”

This shows both a communication and your own difficult feelings. The dragon and quaking are signs that you were meeting things that you were not understanding. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/dragon/ and http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/vibrate-vibration/ To help you to understand I need to link with other parts of this site.

In dreams we project outwardly all the feelings, ideas and sense of ourselves into outwards scenes and actions. This why people believe God and demons are a force outside of them – we did it all the time in waking life too. So the diseased hand, if she was right handed probably represent her inner support system which is not healthy because she has no way of realising what death means.

I quote from something written, “I also had some other wonderful experiences of death in workshops I was leading when people gave me a turn to work. In one of these I saw death and it had a lovely face.  It was the face of everybody I knew and everybody that I loved.  It was naked, naked beauty I called it.  And this was what life was, naked beauty, and that’s what death is, for death strips away everything, and that’s where our beauty is.  And I was so sorry that I forget it so often - to remember that naked beauty… (The person who was recording this say “He is in tears at this point”). It’s a strange something that I can feel alive in me. I think our being all the time is trying to confront us with these issues, and if we don’t confront them, then when it happens we get a hell of a shock because we’re still not confronting them.  We’re still avoiding them.” 

Now there is so much help in the following - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/dreaming-of-death - http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/philosophy-of-dreams/ - http://dreamhawk.com/interesting-people/collected-wisdom/

Tony