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Author Topic: The Face of Death  (Read 1895 times)

Omega

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The Face of Death
« on: September 09, 2016, 11:08:47 AM »
 I've recently bought a car which I really love. ... Dream: In the dream I wake up and look out my bedroom window and I see the man who abused me as a child - he is outside with the engine bonnet open, tampering with the engine, doing something to damage it. I'm a child now even though the car relates to my current adult life. I scream out the window with all my strength, leave it alone, leave my car alone. As usual he is incredibly confident and doesn't bat an eye, so I run downstairs and scream again. Now however my father has taken my car and put it in the shed to keep it safe and the abuser has disappeared.

I am sitting in a sunny backyard talking to Alexander Jodorowsky a film director. *

It's getting hotter and I'm a bit concerned too hot for an older gentleman, then I notice he's shrinking a bit and the rocking chair he's in has either grown or looks huge now in comparison, it's like a deckchair with one sheet of material a soft white linen. So I say to someone with me, he needs shade.

They take over in a very experienced way, before I know it, they have him lying down beneath what appears to be a table but also of linen, perfect for shading him, but then they continue and wrap white cloth around his head and then but a cloth over his face. I'm worried he won't be able to breath, so I remove it, then I see why, he has died. I'm not ready for this, I touch his face unafraid, then I see his eyes flicker and happily I call out 'he's still alive' but then his face transforms and a deep blackness takes over his eyes and his now opening mouth and he moves, extends his head and gives out a death cry - his face and skin look like a living skeleton and its deeply, deeply frightening. There is a thick darkness now too and a sense of being in outer space and only me and this clear vision of his death-face. It's so intense, so powerful, Infinite..I am transfixed unable to look away and feel I have witnessed the very Face of Death. The archetype maybe?

I wake up gasping. I feel a few tears on my face but I can't move I'm numb, in shock, when I can I put my hand on my heart and its racing at a frightening speed, but incredibly fast and light rather than pounding. (I associate having pounding heart with fear dreams.) I'm shaken to the core. But it does not last the day only a short time into waking.

* (I don't know his film work much, bu know other areas andin my late 20's read his biography and was very effected by the freedom of expression he lived in his life, but also aware I felt a bit invisible as a female in the work, I didn't get a huge 'understanding' of the female experience. It's a long time ago, but I think that's what I remember..But 'Death' would be something he would actively engage in in his work.) Other associations.. erudite, emotionally courageous, someone who has confronted their shadow, successful artist, happy, living a vital life I admire/something I would like to emulate.

(I've never been particularly afraid of death, I don't really fear letting go of life, I just think it's natural and I'll be reconnecting to the universe, though maybe subconsciously I do fear that loss of the self I know. I feel this encounter may be partly that subconscious fear, the coldness, the lack of human warmth..)


* I just looked him up tonight - and he has a new trailer for a film he is bringing out and the opening scene is a crowd of people dressed as skeletons walking towards the camera!
« Last Edit: September 09, 2016, 11:03:34 PM by Omega »

Tony Crisp

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Re: The Face of Death
« Reply #1 on: September 11, 2016, 01:07:55 PM »
Omega – A love and a car – an interesting mixture as far as dreams are concerned. Also the face of death. What a dream.

Looking out of your bedroom window – suggests that you were in the area of sleep and dreams – which indicates you have shifted to the dimension of dreams. This dimension is very difficult for most people to understand. They either think of it with the same rules as waking life, or see it as living in the spiritual world – but what does that mean? I believe a dream is a complete mixture of our personality, with all its likes, dislikes, fears, beliefs and convictions, as well as a non-personality experience; a bodiless, formless being – like a hole without any forms in it. It is everything, and as everything cannot take form as something so it remains invisible to us – yet it is our creative centre, beyond time and space. So our dreams come from a formless cause, but to be understood by our brain, our personality, we clothe the dream with images and drama which is an attempt to understand. (I sometimes venture into these long explanations because other people read your posts – the last one I looked at had 170 views). See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/core/

Tampering with your driving power indicates that the experiences has left things, feelings, pains and habits that have messed up with your motivation. About a hundred yards from where I live a large river is cascading over rocks, causing standing and chaotic waves. If those rocks – your injuries and hurt feelings – were removed, the river, your life, would flow calmly.

That is actually shown by your inner father’s influence in your life putting your motivating power in a safe place.

Having experienced that change you now are meeting your inner experience of Alexander Jodorowsky, which you associate with – I was very effected by the freedom of expression he lived in his life, but also aware I felt a bit invisible as a female in the work. But 'Death' would be something he would actively engage in in his work. Other associations, erudite, emotionally courageous, someone who has confronted their shadow, successful artist, happy, living a vital life I admire/something I would like to emulate.

I take it the ‘emotionally courageous, and someone who has confronted their shadow’ is perhaps the core for the next part of your dream. Heat can be a sign or excitement or tremendous change or activity – as when the body is fighting an infection or clearing toxins. It can destroy thing as with fire. Heat can cause pain and so one has an automatic reaction to avoid it.

The images of his death shows your view of the body’s death – which can be horrifying. It is very difficult for us to dissociate our Self from our body. This deep connection our ‘person’ feels with the body causes enormous problems and often pain and terror. In our thinking and feeling we may not fear death – but at the deeper level of bodily associations, it is a different matter.

I know that if we are afraid of death we are also afraid of life. Life and Death are the same. If we allowed our love and sexuality to unfreeze then we would come face-to-face with death - or at least - the fear of death.

Then we experience images and feelings and realisations that life itself, through its creatures, also reached blindly and instinctively toward eternity. Creatures wildly, savagely, fearfully, blindly try to avoid death. This is nature’s early attempts to reach a condition beyond impermanence. The very roots of our being are faced by apparent death and destruction - certainly the destruction of form - and there is an attempt to avoid it.
 
“We accept death because it is a reality - but because we are conscious beings we look for another way. Just like the human species have looked for ways to heal, have looked for ways of birth control, and have looked for other ways to deal with what they face. We cannot help it, because it is in our being. This is the other way. This is union. The first step is to accept ourselves. That is just the first step, to see who we are and what we are. Coming to terms with it. Being happy with it.”

We are letting that deep unconscious striving to know, to face death, to feel the struggle of solving the problem, the pain of existence, to come into consciousness. That’s fucking painful. That’s frightening. How many people want to share humanities deep down fears and pains? How many want to face death for the sake of sharing what they find?”

My own experience, I had for all my adult life studied and believed death was not the end of US. “That’s what life is. A proud, beautiful flowing out of strength, and then, it’s just swept under the mat. Life just builds bodies and then breaks them. Broken bodies on the sea of life. Life once flowed through them, now they are just so much waste on the flow of life, just like empty tins discarded.”

“And then I dreamt that a creature landed on my bed and was crawling toward me. Gradually as I entered the dream I began to feel tense throughout my body, with difficulty in breathing. It felt like a bad asthma attack. Then it slowly grew in intensity and I realised the ‘thing’ was death. As the session deepened I saw that in my feelings I felt that death had put its finger on me. The touch of death was like a disease though. Once touched the disease was incurable and gradually took over one's body. I could hardly breathe as I experienced this This struggle with death went on for some time. It was felt strongly.

The feeling was that death was claiming me. So I wanted to face the truth about death, whatever it was. I wanted to walk right up to it and look it in the face and know whether death meant a final end. If it did I would rather know. As I approached death it - my feelings - went through an amazing transformation. All the tension left me. I felt good, positive and with a sense of hope about life and death. This was so surprising and sudden I wondered what had produced it. I needed to be aware of how this change had occurred. So I retraced my steps to look at death and try to understand why it had lost its power of fear”. 

In another exploration I saw death and it had a lovely face. 

Have I known you? 
Then I have known Death. 
Have I betrayed any? 
Then I have betrayed Death. 
And its face is beauty 
For it is all things - 
Naked, 
Undressed of flesh, 
Leafless, 
Exposed, 
Unclad Life - 
Without the garment 
That our selfhood is.

The end of your dream was the mixture of personality and non Self; the form and the formless – “There is a thick darkness now too and a sense of being in outer space and only me and this clear vision of his death-face. It's so intense, so powerful - Infinite - I am transfixed unable to look away and feel I have witnessed the very Face of Death. The archetype maybe?”

Tony

Omega

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Re: The Face of Death
« Reply #2 on: September 15, 2016, 07:56:54 AM »
Thankyou Tony, this is great.

Not a dream: yesterday I had been for a swim and was standing admiring the view.. When a bat came and landed on the togs I was holding in my hand and as I had them raised to shoulder level to avoid any drips I was pretty much face to face with the bat. He/she had very kind eyes and was completely unafraid of me. Though it looked pretty dirty and dusty from wherever it sleeps, I felt a surge of love and gratefulness for the visit, the kindness.
(I just felt some connection with the death dream..they being creatures associated with darkness.)

Tony Crisp

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Re: The Face of Death
« Reply #3 on: September 15, 2016, 10:42:40 AM »
Those wonderful surges are the food for our soul.

I have a feeling that they will  happen more and more.

Tony