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Author Topic: dinosaur (someone else's dream)  (Read 5402 times)

Monica

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dinosaur (someone else's dream)
« on: March 19, 2018, 04:32:23 AM »
Dear Tony

I've been having profuse dreams that brought back a question left in the air since the first approaches I had to dream interpretation, which has been greatly assisted by your wonderful site. I can't simply tell about the dictionary, because any and all of the posts I've read since the site was presented to me by my sister for the first time have been in synch with my wonderings. Reading back some important notes I had I found this dream along with links taken from here. The thing was I found these dreams someone else wrote to me time ago, hoping to get them interpreted, which we tried along using a pair of dictionaries (so bad I didn't know yours then). I'm still really curious, I'd love to find out about them because they happened to be powerful to me and I see them now as containing important stuff about this person's relationship with what occurred to us both at particular times. Also I've been thinking on the triptych qualities of my dreams, not just in their narratives but in the way they evolve in time. But right now I'm begging you to help me to sort of decode this dream I was told years ago... Here's the transcription:

Dinosaur (Blues)
1 august

"Yesterday night I dreamed of you again, finally. It's been long since I did, I didn't dream anything, everything was black and it was all, I'd wake up without any image. But my prayers were fulfilled at last and you appeared... We were at university, of course, and some peers were presenting  their work; I don't know what was all about, but it had to do with animals. One of them had made a dinosaur, it was huge, incredibly big, as if it was real. But it wasn't really as the ones from Jurassic Park; it reminded me of one of those toy dinosaurs made of an odd rubber, garish. The one we were watching was red on its back and displayed a gradation on its skin that ended as a yellow on the paws. I suppose it's an image from my infancy: I used to have those kind of toys, I remember them well. But with those dimensions it looked terrible, it was an awful work; we were asked to share our opinion and you kicked it saying it was horrible. It was funny, the guy got really annoyed so we went running far from there. In spite of the feeling of being at the campus, there were very strange places, unreal, as those of fairy tales. We arrived to a forest, we held each other's hand and began to walk  into it, somewhat fearful, but blissful about having an excuse to be alone and holding hands, all of this without looking at each other directly, without exchanging stares. There were leaves everywhere, yes, dry leaves that crackled under our feet. We went out that beautiful forest and bumped into a schoolmate of mine who I think is a ballet dancer now, named T. It seemed you both knew each other well, but with regards to me he just remembered me vaguely. He was very surprised to see us holding hands, he felt happy for us. We had a short talk: we spoke about imagination, about embracing so many ideas into a single work, in an only significant gesture. We conclude the conversation and go to the "26th street exit" (the weird 26th's exit). It was quite late, the sky had that purplish-blue color that I fancy so much to looking at, covering it all with a crepuscular aura, making the tones grow colder, making yellow turn to green, invading the figures with a rare feeling of gloom, the one that brings to mind this city, that doesn't really make for a warm and sunny town because it's not its true nature; no, I always paint this city that way, with a color palette between gray and blues, a Picassian blue, the city bathed with a drizzle slowly glazing its dirty streets, the abandoned retail shops, the cheap advertising, the buses and street vendings, all the pedestrians without exception, from businessmen to the destitute, everyone soaked by that blue of the sky that seems to carry all of our hopes away in the air. The first lightposts were already beginning to turn on when we arrived to the highway.  An impulse pushed me to take you into my arms and I slowly drew near your mouth. You seemed gone, having lost any strength, and had let yourself fall upon my hands. I, staggering, tried to hold you with the little strength I still had, getting as near as for my lips to touch yours. And we stayed that way for a while, as the blue dimmed and your face's warmth made me to forget the frozen wind that ran through. I could barely see your sleepy eyes, hardly looking at them with my moribund eyes. All of a sudden, you came back recovered, don't really know well, and you ran away towards the road, without a thought about the risks. From the sidewalk I could see how your earrings went flying and remained hovering in circles, as if escaping from gravity.   [(35:16) Untouchable.] You ended up crossing the highway miraculously, and my legs began running after you, trying to reach your slippery earrings which floated like feathers. Cars drove passing over me, crossing through my body, and I'd finally begin to understand what was happening: we were ghosts, bodiless spirits, insubstantial; the world wouldn't affect us anymore, we were already dead. I picked up your earrings, and holding them I got through to the other side, searching for you like a lunatic. I watched you lying on the floor, stunned about not knowing what had happened, still weak. I made an attempt to lift you from the floor but then you recovered quickly and put me into your arms. I would repeatedly kiss your head, as you kissed my chest non-stop. It was a total embrace, not out of strength as it was before, on the contrary, we clinged to each other as if the world ended in our bodies, as if we wanted our lives to be an only one. And I woke up, tangled in my blankets, holding my pillow tight, in the midst of an inexplicable shudder."

This post I find related with the dream depicted here: https://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/dream-lovers/

Tony Crisp

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Re: dinosaur (someone else's dream)
« Reply #1 on: March 19, 2018, 09:14:53 AM »
Monica – About dinosaurs, Jurassic Park creatures are now out of date as far as their colouring is concerned, for in recent years it has been found that they had multi coloured bodies, often covered with feathers. So your coloured dinosaur may not be a flight of fancy. But in general dinosaur dreams tend to be about the ancient strata of our consciousness. 

Also I am not sure if you are up to date with what I see in dreamed of friends. When you think about a lover, a friend or a person you know, you are only taking in your thoughts, impressions and feelings about them. So many people do not realise that they have an inner person equally as powerful as the external person you know. You have taken in millions of bits of memory, lessons learnt, life experiences along with all the feelings or problems met by meeting or living with them, and they change you and make you the person you are. The memories and experience we gather unconsciously change us and are not lost. It is part of you and is symbolised in dreams as a person or event. Such an inner person can appear in dreams because you still carry the memories or impressions of them, and so they influenced what you hold within you, and obviously the theme of your dream.

People tend to believe their life began at birth or at conception. That is quite a false concept, for the seed or cell that you developed from wasn’t a new thing, for no plant or creature grows from a dead seed, and each living seed carries within it all the past gathered from all its forebears. So, the seed in your mother’s womb is as old as and even older than human kind, and you carry that wisdom or memories in you. But in this life you developed a new brain, and the memories you gathered this time are what you built your personality from, but beneath that is a very ancient self. You ran away from seeing that.

The forest you entered was an easy entrance into your own depths, and was the natural in you, the least changed by our commercial world. Even so you are blissful but are not completely easy with holding hands in public. Even kissing leads to a sense of dying and a feeling you are both dead. The cars passing through you and your feelings about that are caused by the mix up we feel about physical life and dream or inner life. For in dreams nothing can hurt us and we cannot be killed, for we are already in the realm of death when we sleep. See https://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/masters-of-nightmares/

In sleep we are already “ghosts, bodiless spirits, insubstantial; the world couldn't affect us anymore.” I had no sense of having a body. Thoughts had ceased, except for a murmur apparently a thousand miles away. Yet in blackness, in immensity, in absence of thought I existed vitally as bodiless awareness. We think that we are our body because we have no other experience of our existence. So, we identify with our body and so are terrified of dying – which in a sense is what we do every time we go to sleep and leave our sense of a body behind.

When we dream, our muscles are paralysed and we also lose all sensations arising from our body senses – our eyes, ears, taste, touch, and smell. In that condition, we are bodiless, but to maintain our confidence, as people get terrified when they get near to realising that they are fundamentally bodiless consciousness, so they create a dream image of themselves with a body. Out of that arises all the fear or sense of death – for even if we lose all our limbs we are still us.

I feel that you are trying to realise your wider life beyond what you know through your body with a gender, but your dream ends with an inexplicable shudder. Shuddering, vibration and shaking is movement, and movement is one of the main signs of life. Life and growth are interwoven, and is one of the first signs of massive personal growth or change is shaking or vibration in the body or pelvic movement or even electricity running through your body. That is why the Quakers used that name, because they shook or quacked; also the Shakers and Shaktipat participants had the same experience.

The example is from a man who had repressed his sexual feelings for years because of a personal problem. The example shows what happened when he began to emerge from the repression.

 Example: But very shortly the urge arose strongly again, this time for O. to handle my genitals, and to suckle her breast; as this happened, the most tremendous sexual feelings arose, and I began to shake and vibrate at the pelvis with pleasure.

Tony

Monica

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Re: dinosaur (someone else's dream)
« Reply #2 on: March 20, 2018, 01:11:00 AM »
(The name "dinosaur" was put by the person who dreamed this). The post about nightmares was great! It responds precisely about the dream I wrote, in fact now I remember the way I named it in my notes was "a beautiful nightmare"... yours are always outstanding. I have to say this dream I wanted to understand and well, it's not my dream but someone else's, that's why I've kept guessing... the fascinating thing about this one to me is the way it impacted my life through this person. I mean, this boy and I were just getting to know each other, mainly writing to each other (we lived in different towns and had just met at university that year) when he told this dream to me. For me it was a wonderful dream and in some way he "used" it as a way to express feelings that to that point I didn't know that could be "real". And I'm the kind of person that believes a dream has the power of expressing honestly things we don't even know that are inside of us. Of course there was also a background for this story and he had already told he wanted to deepen his relationship with me and I felt the same so the dream acted as the "revelation" I needed to take it more seriously. In short, I kind of fell in love with that dream, so I thought it was worth going beyond the friendship that was blossoming between us (I won't judge now if it was a "bad" decision to develop such sudden confidence in my feelings and those of another just because a dream seemed to "signal" so). I simply felt he was being honest and the dream, at least superficially, showed he was really opening to me and the great experience a relationship could be; I also was extremely curious to know how a person could "follow" the flow of events so naturally as he seemed to be doing, almost exactly the way I "dreamed of" when all began.

I think your answer tells a lot about that perception, and of course about this boy's personality. It showed in fact to be very contrasting to mine, because, when we accorded with meeting again and began the "real" relationship, it wasn't long until he acted as if he was having a hard time trying to live to some weird expectations he had put to himself (thinking it was me, maybe). By example, he wasn't as passionate or open as he depicted himself or he wanted me to think, as the dream supposedly said he was, and it sort of ended
up being a mess in the sense he didn't want to demonstrate anything, I guess 'out of a sense of inadequacy', because he wasn't feeling the way he thought he'd feel being along with me (holding hands, etc). I didn't force anything but I wouldn't stop being freely what I am and he was growing uncomfortable, maybe he wanted a more "secret" kind of thing, as when we wrote to each other (in that sense, maybe in a daring way against roles and stantdards, I think I don't really repress my urges because of social or personal dilemmas). I feel I am free enough to confide in myself and others, with the obvious "weird" or "forbidden" sttuf that comes along. I mean, I'm not a libertine, because I believe in the conscious excercise of our will and wouldn't do in full knowledge anything that could harm my own wellness or that of another, but I also do feel at peace in knowing there are lots of things in our humanity that can be scary and ugly (because of the unknown), and I think my dreams tell me about that clearly; I don't feel menaced or repressed on embracing my sexuality and all the feelings and thoughts arising from my "encounters" with my own nature (which happen so openly in dreams).

OF course I'm also very ignorant  of so many things yet, and naive for many others, and that gives me an odd sense of wellness of being just me, not expecting too much as to fail to my own "standards", what I think was the main conflict with this boy. He expected maybe the wrong thing because I acted so "liberal" in so many senses, but he was afraid or ashamed to admit what he wanted for real (he had embarked in a relationship with me without dealing with his own conflicts and desires) and some way he disappointed himself after short, saying it was me the disillusioned one -to escape again of his own responsibility about himself more than me-. He had somewhat talked about the very hard, abusive family issues he lived, and an unresolved and disastrous long relationship he had "ruined", but he didn't seem to want having me helping out, not even as a comforting company -in fact as time passed he seemed desperately in need to make me disappear, literally-; and again the curious thing was that a dream had told everything before he could even put the theme, but then I thoght it's just a dream, isn't it?. It was like the "foreboding" of a perpetrated abandonment, he wasn't even aware he had in mind to get away with when he told that dream to me. And of course as I said, neither I had a clue what would happen, so candidly confident about my feelings. I was just "believing" (and didn't have any idea but the romantic one about what dreams can convey).

I notice the interesting "series" structure dreams develop to bring about the real issues, as pointed out in your nightmares' post, and how they work out the power inside us, making us to confront the most incredible aspects of life and ourselves. I won't deny the dream remained haunting for a considerable time, because I had actually fell in love with what it represented. And of course some people said that we both were complete fools in believing a relationship based on fanciful artistic, unreal interests and actual dreams could possibly work. I won't judge anything about this, cause for me, even if the material consequences proved a plain and horrible failure, after he sort of ran away -because of guilt and other stuff that he won't ever say I guess-, this experience was yes, a hurtful and very disturbing experience, but also an invaluable opportunity for growth, that I chose to take that way,  recognising my faults along with the need to learn real love and compassion and not judging either ourselves or others, and seeing the great wisdom of God manifested in our lives, to make them whole beyond our self impossed limitations, fears and desires. Now I just remember this and think he could use some help like this as much as me, as when he said I was scaring him when I told that our relationship had really been one of ghosts, as in the dream. Or the day I asked him to hold my hand -some time after we ended the affair- (it wasn't a relationship for real in the eyes of the people he looked to for "help"), and he said it was "inconvenient" and I realized that was the person he had kept hidden for all those
months; he asked me, maybe mistaking dreams with reality -didn't we ever?- and just said "sorry" but kept acting his convenient "public" self, the one he didn't show to me but now; it was sad but I wasn't discouraged about getting some truth from it, and one day acted out the last part of the dream for him... I don't know if he got the point or if he will some day, but I feel I was as sincere and confident as I could for him to the end, in spite of my flaws.

(And yes, I've heard about dinosaurs being far more colorful and exotic than those of movies, and how persons in dreams reflect and portray aspects of ourselves, -maybe this boy didn't, I don't know...- thanks!)  ;)

Tony Crisp

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Re: dinosaur (someone else's dream)
« Reply #3 on: March 20, 2018, 09:20:39 AM »
Monica - Thanks for explaining, it helps.

I see I try to throw everything I have learned in answering the dream, which in your case was not necessary. It could have been said in a small number of words. Such as:

You were in a learning situation - the university. The first lesson was to face a very primal level of yourself in meeting the dinosaur. You didn't handle it well and you (M) was with me to help me face it or deal with the problem, but you ran from it.

You go back a few paces from meeting yourself by entering the forest - the earliest phase of the inner journey https://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/archetype-of-the-night-journey-the-search-for-self/

You held hands, probably because it is a way even chimpanzees do when they feel anxious. But even so you did not 'look' at each other directly, showing the anxiety of really knowing each other. The ballet  dancer may represent the ability to express a wide range of yourself - but that didn't go well either so again you pulled back. That really took you into a dark place within you, so much so you face the death if you loved image  (M) and freezing wind, meaning you again blocked any real living feelings.

Whew.

Tony  :o




Monica

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Re: dinosaur (someone else's dream)
« Reply #4 on: March 20, 2018, 07:42:25 PM »
Gosh Tony!

Stunning  ::) It's so precise as having a picture of what seemed to happen in his head. Thanks a lot!

...Could it explain he ended up hating me, as if I had frustrated a very secret longing he had...?

(I really felt sorry for my ignorance and his confusions, wish I'd known this site back then :)

Tony Crisp

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Re: dinosaur (someone else's dream)
« Reply #5 on: March 22, 2018, 09:48:24 AM »
Monica - Hate and love are two sides of the same coin - especially if the person has not grown beyond the baby or child level of love.

"It is difficult to properly explain that the child you were can react to the events of your life with huge emotion; often a swing between murderous rage and an attempt to placate your mother. But I recognised the feeling. It was the murderous rage I had felt when I was suddenly abandoned by my mother. See http://dreamhawk.com/inner-life/your-inner-child/ and https://dreamhawk.com/relationship-sex/ages-of-love-2/"

Tony