Zehra – There is so much to learn about our inner world. I will try to explain your feeling, “I was scared because it felt like somebody is moving my body and I don’t have control!”
It is so strange that many people feel that. Strange because we are not in control of our breathing, our heart beat, or the thousands of inner movements our body makes. But of course people are used to those movement, and people believe their body is a type of automatic machine that only moves when we make it, to experience it dance and move and deeply experience all by itself is beyond their belief – they are scared they are not in control or that something or someone else is. Thus their belief in being possessed.
But in life and sleep we have two powerful actions working in us. The first is our waking experience based on having a body, its limitations, vulnerabilities and a particular gender.
While we sleep our conscious self is largely or totally unconscious, and while we dream our voluntary muscles are paralysed – therefore another will or motivating force moves our body. So we have a Conscious Will, and what I will call a Life Will.
This second motivator is the power that gave us life and continues to express as dreams, in our breathing and heartbeat – our life. This I have given the description as the Life Will.
The first one we have experience of as we can move our arm or speak in everyday activities; but the second will takes over when we sleep.
This Life will can move us to speak, to move our body, and in fact do things that we cannot do with our Conscious Will. See
https://dreamhawk.com/interesting-people/edgar-cayce-and-the-cosmic-mind-superminds/ What most people in today's world don’t realise that is when we drop our control and allow spontaneous body expression our Life Will breaks through and expresses. This was recognised and used, even venerated, in past ages. Today I have tried to explain it in terms hopefully understood by people today. Control and letting go of control also relate very fully to what we know about ourselves. This is because with too tight a control on what we allow ourselves to feel or experience we build a barrier against the re-experiencing and healing of old painful events, and also for the arising of new aspects of our potential to emerge, for the Life Will is so wonderfully trying to clear such blocked emotions, and as it clears them it leads us to a life of wonder. See
https://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/opening-to-life/ -
https://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/the-waking-lucid-dream/ As to whether there are any places in the Netherlands where you can do this with group? Groups seem to need people who have confidently used the approach and others feel safe. But in my case I have never managed to be someone who manages to stay in one place long enough. Also many people are scared, as you were, by experience of surrendering your will to Life/God, and so it is difficult to get groups started. One group I tried to get going in a Quaker meeting, the man said, “Why should I surrender, because if I do the Devil will possess me.” He was obviously already possessed by fear. Another woman who had real spontaneous movements suddenly stood up and said, “This is against my religion!” The strange thing was it WAS her religion, because Christianity started with Pentecost, where the participants experienced spontaneous movements and acted almost like they were drunk. I had so many experiences like that I gave up trying – except explaining it on my site.
Tony
