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Author Topic: 55.000 people burning  (Read 3411 times)

Yoma

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55.000 people burning
« on: July 07, 2018, 02:04:12 AM »
Hello Tony!
Its been a long time since i last wrote anything to you. I didnt have much to say lately. Its 3:30 am here and i just woke up from a a murderous dream. Last time this happened to me was 2 years ago,when i dreamt something terrible of my mom. Now,its the same but a different story.
I was downtown,doing drugs and my mom caught me. In 3 days there had to be a religous event at our local church,but this time it could shelter 55.000 people (huge) and my mom was so disappointed in me that she gave up going (she's very religious,its not her style,afterall it was Jesus Revival). The dream continued with me doing drugs in the same place but "today" was the day of that event. While i was smokiing some weed,i was watching a video where the church was in flames with 55.000 people in it. I could literally hear all those souls screaming and not being able to escape.  I suddenly ran home to see if my mom is alive. I went to a weird room (it wasnt our house even tho the dream took me there so clearly) and my mom was waiting for me,siting in a chair,looking at the table,very depressesd. Her eyes were "dead*. I felt so much joy and i started crying my hearth out saying "im so glad you are ok! You didnt go!" And she looked at me with a serious face and told me not to be happy and at that moment i felt she was dead inside and suddenly i could feel that someting happened to her. The dream took me to some kind of "movie" where the devil would rise,create a gang and rape my mother. Thats when i woke up,because of the porn scenes.

Id like to add some things our family went trough in the past 2 years. My brother had huge problems with drugs and since he came back 2 years ago,our life was a hell because of him not being able to be a "vertical" man,and because we did everything we could to help him win against his demons. He gave up drugs* but he started drinking. It wasnt much difference,tho. The emotional impact was the same,especially on my mother. She is the one suffering the most,and i suffer because of that. + I live in a very stressful environment at my college and 5 days ago i had my biggest failure. I tought i was going to have severe depreession. All those negative feeelings curled up inside me led me to this dream? I tend to feel so. But my hearth ached more than 2 years,its not only these recent events. There would be too much to tell. The point is,right after i woke up,i felt like,in this dream,i felt how my brother was feeling for so many years. And i had a feeling my dad would wake up,too,and he did! I went out for a smoke with him :) i feel very heavy.
2 years ago i was practicing meditation for astral projection and i had a similar event in a dream,but the difference is i had contol over it. Now that i started practicing again,it happened again but this time i lost control badly. I could only be a "story teller" not a "player"..it doesent feel right. May it be a message that im not ready to reach a higher state of mind?

Tony Crisp

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Re: 55.000 people burning
« Reply #1 on: July 08, 2018, 01:15:49 PM »
Yoma – Control – I will start with that. In our western society we are drop fed the idea that we must be in control of our life and destiny.

But what actually are you in control of? The most important parts of your existence are out of your control, your heartbeat, your digestion and the millions of balancing forces taking place in your body are not yours to control. And yet they are the very things keeping you alive!

If the self-regulatory processes of your being ceased their action you would be dead in a very short time. Even a brisk walk causes such enormous changes in the body it would kill you without the action of self-regulation. The production of lactic acid, unchecked, would destroy the system. Also the drop in blood sugar, unless balanced by the release of glucose from the storage in tissues and liver, would result in collapse.

The level after level of safety factors built into our system is nothing short of incredible. For adequate functioning our blood pressure needs to be at about 110 to 120 (i.e. it displaces 110 millimetres of mercury). It can drop to 70-80 before a critical situation arises in which tissue may die because blood is not reaching it. If we lose a lot of blood, even as much as 30 or 40 percent, the self-regulatory process maintains adequate blood pressure by constricting the blood vessels. This action is controlled by a part of the brain. If that brain area is injured or destroyed, other centres take control. If they are eliminated, ganglia in the sympathetic nervous system direct the action. If they too are eliminated the walls of the arteries and veins themselves regulate their own activity.

The very first step on our journey is framed in these questions: Do I as a personality and conscious being, arise out of my own self and will, or has something I know little of caused me to exist? Do I acknowledge frequently my dependence upon that something, called Life? If not, am I impractical not to open my will, heart, passions and mind, my whole being, to that influence without which I would not exist?

So being in control can mean you are often fighting yourself; but of course we remain dual beings, so need some control, but can you control your emotions, your sexual impulses, your eating, or lack of it?. See https://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/opening-to-life/ and https://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/integration-meeting-oneself/#Ox 

In the past it was called God, but the ridiculous image of god portrayed is way off of what was its original definition – the huge father in the sky, portrayed over and over in paintings. Yet the Hebrew religion from what the Christian views grew, pointed out that the original cause was unknowable for it was everything, and making it a male figure makes it a ‘Thing’. Everything cannot be symbolised easily, and things are only parts of everything.

I am saying the next thing just in case it is important to you. Smoking releases the waking lucid dreaming process. Which is wonderful if you know how to use ‘being the image or thing’. Otherwise the real dangers are that unconscious content, which in ordinary dreaming breaks through a threshold in a regulated way, emerges with less regulation, and without the safety factor of calling it a dream. Fears, paranoid feelings, past traumas, depressing feelings can emerge into the consciousness of an individual who has no skill in handling such forces. See https://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/integration-meeting-oneself/#Shaman

Tony
« Last Edit: July 10, 2018, 07:50:39 AM by Tony Crisp »