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Author Topic: How do we get stuck in life – unable to move or grow?  (Read 532 times)

Tony Crisp

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How do we get stuck in life – unable to move or grow?
« on: March 01, 2019, 10:03:22 AM »
Many of us get stuck in life situations from which we may never emerge. The situation might be one of never establishing a full and satisfying sexual relationship; constantly feeling hurt by the actions of others; existing in a state of depression or anxiety; forever having to seek activity or company to deal with ones own inner emptiness; experiencing enormous jealousy or anxiety in a relationship – the list could be endless. Orthodox medicine, recognising how difficult it is to help people move from such mental emotional prisons has turned to chemical attempts to shift the person’s inner state. Overall this sometimes seems to aid, but is not a universal answer to the human condition. There is however a self help path we can take that can radically change such situations. The first step is to recognise how we personally hold such inner conditions in place. Maybe we might even ask the question as to why we maintain such an awful relationship with life. The answer to that question might very well reveal the most powerful process that freezes us in our difficulty.

Example: I had an insight that I had got into a negative feedback loop. Because I had got stuck in this feeling of failure and ageing without any creativeness, I feared I was stuck there in reality, which produced the certainty I was stuck, which produced the inability to move out. We feed back to ourselves images of failure and feelings of unattractiveness, and all the other negative feelings we all meet during the week. Instead of looking at them and seeing them as passing feelings, we take them as impressions of reality and drown in them. We accept them as true and start to live them. When that happens we see conformation for the negatives and so it goes on.

I tried to find the way out of this loop. The only way out I could find was the realisation that the loop has no end, like the figure eight. There is only one thing to do, stop it playing. Grab it and stop the crazy record or habit carrying on.

To help with this, to help grab the thing and kill it's influence over us, we obviously have to realise it is untrue. If we still believe the loop that is playing is a truth, then we only strengthen the action. So for its cessation we need to realise that our sense of self is a constantly moving fragile thing that has no stable reality. We aren’t ANYTHING – stable, so how can we be a failure, or a success, or great, or of no account, or any thought or feeling? No thought or feeling represents our reality. No feeling, or sense of ourselves, is anything more than a sense, a feeling, it is not US. So how could this feeling represent some sort of permanent personal reality?

See Conditioned Reflexes or Responses - https://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/conditioned-reflexes-or-responses/ and https://dreamhawk.com/inner-life/habits/
« Last Edit: March 01, 2019, 10:07:53 AM by Tony Crisp »