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Author Topic: Have You Faced Your Own Fears?  (Read 208 times)

Tony Crisp

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Have You Faced Your Own Fears?
« on: May 08, 2019, 10:09:32 AM »
Fears are a natural reaction to certain things, and they can become habits and can play over and over with no real cause. See https://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/features-found-on-site/-%20http:/dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/questions-2/#Victim

Also remember that dreams are a very different world than waking life, and in fact even if you experience a dream of great terror nothing can hurt you. But of course you may wake feeling the same terror, yet nothing has actually hurt you, you are merely facing your own feelings of fear. In fact dreams are like a computer game with a very real virtual reality – you can be killed a hundred times but the game/dream does you no harm.

Example: I had dreamt my wife and I had been talking about whether there were any ghosts in the house. On going to bed I sat in bed and challenged any ghosts to show themselves, certain I could handle them. There was no response, and feeling rather smug I lay down to go to sleep. Just then the door creaked open, and in walked two black men who looked as if they had climbed out of an old grave. Their flesh was falling off them and they were blank eyed. I was terrified and made the sign of the cross and said a few holy words to ward them off. It worked and they went, but not for long. This time all my signs and prayers didn’t get rid of them and they put their dead hands around my throat strangling me. I woke screaming and frightened.

What I gathered from these dreams was that originally I had repressed parts of my own natural sexual feelings, shown as the black men. They were dead because I had killed this part of myself as a teenager. But I was deeply frightened of these sexual urges because of what had happened in adolescence. So I never had such a dream again.

I found that to get rid of the fear I had to face what it was about instead of running from it as if it would kill me. Simon, as a human being you are not simply a creature that responds automatically to your environment. Even intelligent animals such as chimpanzees and foxes do not simply responded to their environment instinctively. They learn certain types of behaviour from their parents, from experience, and from their fellow animals. They, like us, are capable of learning. Our own relationship with parents, other human beings and animals during infancy, passes on to us an enormous amount of information through our ability to copy behaviour, through word of mouth, through our own experience, and through reading or viewing.

So, many of us have awful images or sense of fear haunting us from being passed on. See The Conjuring Trick It might help to use Secrets of Power Dreaming –  The following is a quote from the National Health Website.

Whatever it is that scares you, here are 10 ways to help you cope with your fear and anxiety:
1. Take time out
It feels impossible to think clearly when you’re flooded with fear or anxiety. A racing heart, sweating palms and feeling panicky and confused are the result of adrenalin. So, the first thing to do is take time out so you can physically calm down.

Distract yourself from the worry for 15 minutes by walking around the block, making a cup of tea or having a bath. When you’ve physically calmed down, you’ll feel better able to decide on the best way to cope.

2. What’s the worst that can happen?
When you’re anxious about something, be it work, a relationship or an exam, it can help to think through what the worst end result could be. Even if a presentation, a call or a conversation goes horribly wrong, chances are that you and the world will survive. Sometimes the worst that can happen is a panic attack. If you start to get a faster heartbeat or sweating palms, the best thing is not to fight it. Stay where you are and simply feel the panic without trying to distract yourself. Placing the palm of your hand on your stomach and breathing slowly and deeply (no more than 12 breaths a minute) helps soothe the body. It may take up to an hour, but eventually the panic will go away on its own. The goal is to help the mind get used to coping with panic, which takes the fear of fear away.

3. Expose yourself to the fear
Avoiding fears only makes them scarier. If you panic one day getting into a lift, it’s best to get back into a lift the next day. Stand in the lift and feel the fear until it goes away. Whatever your fear, if you face it, it should start to fade.

4. Welcome the worst
Each time fears are embraced, it makes them easier to cope with the next time they strike, until in the end they are no longer a problem. Try imagining the worst thing that can happen – perhaps it’s panicking and having a heart attack. Then try to think yourself into having a heart attack. It’s just not possible. The fear will run away the more you chase it.

5. Get real
Fears tend to be much worse than reality. Often, people who have been attacked can’t help thinking they’re going to be attacked again every time they walk down a dark alley. But the chance that an attack will happen again is actually very low. Similarly, people sometimes tell themselves they’re a failure because they blush when they feel self-conscious. This then makes them more upset. But blushing in stressful situations is normal. By remembering this, the anxiety goes away.

6. Don’t expect perfection
Black-and-white perfectionist thinking such as, “If I’m not the best mum in the world, I’m a failure,” or, “My DVDs aren’t all facing in the same direction, so my life is a mess,” are unrealistic and only set us up for anxiety. Life is full of stresses, yet many of us feel that our lives must be perfect. Bad days and setbacks will always happen, and it’s essential to remember that life is messy.

You can use your inner strength to clear what blocks you, you are often confronted by two choices – to go up or down – the good or the bad – what you want and what others want – the rules and law of the land and what we ourselves want. This is like an either/or thing – you can go up or down. But dreams have a lot of tricks or talents that we usually forget we have because you can do both. In fact our body or being does everything at once. For instance our body is constantly dying and creating new life.

It is important to realise that you have enormous range of choices, but it is often best to swing backwards and forwards between the opposites to find where you feel balanced. It might help with this by using – Secrets of Power Dreaming

7. Visualise
Take a moment to close your eyes and imagine a place of safety and calm: it could be a picture of you walking on a beautiful beach, or snuggled up in bed with the cat next to you or a happy memory from childhood. Let the positive feelings soothe you until you feel more relaxed.

8. Talk about it
Sharing fears takes away a lot of their scariness. If you can’t talk to a partner, friend or family member, call a helpline such as the Samaritans (08457 90 90 90, open 24 hours a day). And if your fears aren’t going away, ask your GP for help. GPs can refer people for counselling, psychotherapy or online help through a new online service called FearFighter.

9. Go back to basics
A good sleep, a wholesome meal and a walk are often the best cures for anxiety. The easiest way to fall asleep when worries are spiralling through the mind can be to stop trying to nod off. Instead, try to stay awake. Many people turn to alcohol or drugs to self-treat anxiety, with the idea that it will make them feel better, but these only make nervousness worse. On the other hand, eating well will make you feel great physically and mentally.

10. Reward yourself
Finally, give yourself a treat. When you’ve picked up that spider or made that call you’ve been dreading, reinforce your success by treating yourself to a candlelit bath, a massage, a country walk, a concert, a meal out, a book, a DVD or whatever little gift makes you happy. See https://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/what-we-need-to-remember-about-us-3/#Hurt;  https://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/lifes-little-secrets/