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Author Topic: Dark night of the soul  (Read 2663 times)

mikey

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Dark night of the soul
« on: November 15, 2021, 07:54:48 PM »
Hi Tony,
I read a book by Douglas Harding a while back,on having no head,a zen look at the spiritual journey,
In it he talked about an area called the barrier,
Which is the experience  of feeling that all progress this far has been a waste of time,despite some great insights,
I find myself in this area now,if nog for some time,
The other night I had this dream,
A battle is being fought around a king who is shining like gold,to his right sits his daughter,who I am defending with all my strength,
Finally the shield protecting her is compromised,and she gets killed,despite my efforts.
The fighting stops,everything goes silent as everyone present stands and looks at the king,waiting,for some reaction,
He just sits there,I feel his nobility and power in that he was unmovable by any negative event,
I felt so moved by this,I step forward before him ,I kneel and stick my sword in the ground before him,
I say,my king,from this moment forth,I am your man,your champion,
After this,we are now in a helicopter like vehicle rising up,
The king is on my left piloting,the queen on my right,
I am in the middle,its now my job to take care of and keep a little dog safe by tucking it into my seatbelt.

I feel there is a great message in this dream,and somehow relates to the barrier I find myself up against,
Would love to hear any thoughts.
Regards mikey

- anna -

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Re: Dark night of the soul
« Reply #1 on: November 16, 2021, 02:29:46 PM »

Hi Mikey 😊

What I see in your dream is your inner conflict that was part of the very difficult process of letting go emotionally of your (youngest?) daughter. 

It is the King archetype in you that enabled you to fulfill your role as a father to the fullest (a king who is shining like gold) AND to let go again of this role as you knew it (the daughter gets killed) in order to make place for different ways of relating to yourself and your child(ren). 

It IS a very noble and powerful process Mikey, as it is for the greater good of all involved! So having gone all the way you ARE a champion indeed!

Anna  :)


mikey

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Re: Dark night of the soul
« Reply #2 on: November 17, 2021, 04:00:35 PM »
Thank you Anna,
Interesting what you said,
I dont mind sharing this,I have had to bring up 3 girls,2 of which are twins,the youngest by 3 mins,got married in August this year,
That's all my girls flown the nest,
I have felt a sudden rush of redundancy,as most parents ,and just reached retirement too  ,got my dog Luna,just me and her now.
I think I will build a boat !
Regards mikey

- anna -

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Re: Dark night of the soul
« Reply #3 on: November 17, 2021, 08:21:06 PM »

Thank you very much for your feedback Mikey  :)
It is helpful for me to know that what I see is correct on a very practical level, which is merely the only level
at which I can see in dreams.

As dreams have lots of levels simultaneously, I am sure there are more profound meanings to be found with a "greater"
message, but that would be something for Tony to see.

Apart from your sense of humour I like the symbol of building a boat;
it will help you leave the shore to find something new.

Take care  :)

Anna

Tony Crisp

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Re: Dark night of the soul
« Reply #4 on: November 23, 2021, 11:28:32 AM »
Mikey - I am so often 'not here' . Thank goodness Anna has such wonderful insights.

But my attention was caught by "Hi Tony,
I read a book by Douglas Harding a while back, on having no head, a zen look at the spiritual journey,
In it he talked about an "area called the barrier"

I have been so busy writing a summary of things learnt in 60 years of looking. A quote from what I wrote about this 'barrier'.

"There are many modern and ancient ways to arrive at a better life. I will give some details of them.

Many of the ways describe a process of personal growth that is possible for many today. Just as humans started their journey as an animal with no speech and no rational mind and moved on into what we know today as self-awareness; so we are ready to take another step in our evolution. This is sometimes seen as a release from suffering and is a growth in awareness as ahead of self-consciousness as self-consciousness is of primal animal consciousness.

To properly connect and realise what is being communicated it is necessary to be able to put one’s rational mind aside and able to enter a different level of ourselves. I call it The Keyboard Condition - https://dreamhawk.com/body-and-mind/the-keyboard-condition/

R. D. Laing, the psychiatrist, in describing the search for one’s fundamental self said, ‘The Life I am trying to grasp is the me that is trying to grasp it.’

One of the sites listed has a heading, ‘What you are looking for is what is looking.’

This change is not a state of mind you can create or develop. It is something beyond any change, outside of anything you can develop. After all, development suggests change.

The frustrating thing about finding this is that the harder one tries to grasp it, the further away from it one gets. The more effort one makes in trying to achieve it, the less one finds of it.

It is the ever present, self existent core of yourself that remains when all else drops away. So the question should not be can I develop the state of mind that is sometimes called enlightenment, but how can I realise this fundamental state?

A classic statement is, "Abandon all hope, ye who enter here." It can be seen as a warning, but it is given depth through the words of T. S Elliot:   
I said to my soul, be still and wait without hope 
For hope would be hope for the wrong thing; wait without love 
For love would be love of the wrong thing; there is yet faith 
But the faith and the love and the hope are all in the waiting. 
Wait without thought, for you are not ready for thought:
So, the darkness shall be the light, and the stillness the dancing. 

Some years ago, I tried to do as Eliot suggested; for weeks I gave up doing my daily yoga postures, the hours of meditation and sat without any expectations so I waited for the unknown. I felt that it was like waiting for a stranger to come and touch me on the shoulder as I stood outside the cinema at the top of Tottenham Court Road in London, then I would know them.

I waited like that for many weeks and then one night I had got out of bed to visit the toilet and was just getting back into bed when I heard a loud bodiless voice saying, “You asked how God touches the human soul, now watch closely.”  I had never before had such an experience and so I felt something important had occurred. I did not have to wait long because I was not touched – I was shaken!!!" 

To cut to the chase you can never know what you do no know - for in searching for yourself you are entering the unknown so you need to be able to put all your thinking and searching to sleep and watch without any preconceptions. Not easy but it can be done.

Tony