Nowotny – You have to realise that a dream is not like walking with your actual ex and conversing with him. The dream ex is all your memories and feelings of him put into his shape, and brought to life.
Therefore it seems as if the dream is about the difficult feelings you experience when you wake. So I think you ought not to blame your feelings on your ex, but take responsibility for them. Take time with them, even with the help of someone who listens, otherwise the feelings will haunt you.
It seems as if there are things that you did not sort out in the divorce.
Tony