J. L. explored his own dream, and says of it:
The Test is a test of my own quality. I am asking myself what is the quality of my life. My own Mediterranean nature is very open and demonstrative of scorn or praise, and this is the men. But it is also what I am waking to - the Middle Eastern / Eastern religious influences. Even Christianity is a Middle Eastern religion. The dance is the dance of a one legged man. It is saying, look, even with one leg you can still express the power of life. You can still dance your life. Then when I lift my feet from the floor and hang suspended, I felt this as saying with my life - see, no legs necessary. Even if you don’t have any legs, it doesn’t matter if you heart is clear and loving. See, SUNSHINE! I felt this as the wonderful awareness of being at one with life that comes so easily now, and fills me with quiet peace and acceptance. It is dwelling in the Self Existent awareness at the core of one's being that is unveiled when the heart and mind are quiet and at peace. This Self Existent is known as eternal existent clear consciousness. It is timeless and without being, yet is all being. It is always in us, but often veiled by our desires, fears, grasping and effort.
My floating without visible means of support was saying, see, if the Self Existent shines through you, you do not need the usual means of support, like looking beautiful, money, power, authority, an acceptable role, etc.
Then when my body arced backwards I felt this as a statement that no matter what contortions life leads you into, there is no pain or sorrow.
Finally, the thunderous song in the clouds, I experienced as something very simple. When I die into the One in my everyday life, when I let my life flow out of that instead of my personal plans and hopes or ambitions, - There was an experience of how the highest in usis created as a sort of inner reality by millions of people giving them awareness and energy. I said as I was exploring this that I, Allah, the Christ, Buddha, was waking up from the darkness. That while in the darkness I had dreamt. And my dream was that I lived as a man, and the man was called JL. But now as I wake I realise I have had this dream of his life. I see that while I dreamt him he dreamt of me. He was in search of me, not knowing he was my dream and he sought his own reality.
Then I came out of this and said that as humans we create a face on the Self Existent in ourselves. We place upon it the face or image of Christ, Allah, or Buddha. I am waking to the Self Existent in myself. In looking at what the experience of this was I came across the apparent resistance of feeling that I was not worthy, that it was too high or wonderful for me, thus the image of being up in the clouds.
J. L.