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Relaxation and Giving Birth – 5

Yoga and Childbirth – Chapter 5

A mother of two children once told me the fascinating story of her youngest son’s birth. The birth was proving to be very difficult, so much so that she felt she could not go on any longer. Her contractions were such agony that she could bear it no more, and, as it were she inwardly collapsed. To her amazement, what had been pain become a feeling of great bliss. She said that a most wild and wonderful emotion came upon her. No longer any pain, but like the mounting pleasure of sexual abandon during intercourse, and her son was born in her ecstasy of orgasm.

Think upon this deeply and often, for here is surely the birthright of every woman. Such a moment of creation should not be one of pain, or of discomfort, but of ecstasy. Yet why has it so often been otherwise? Is the answer not in the mother’s own description? Only when she collapsed into relaxation, and had thus totally surrendered herself to the process of life taking place, did the ecstasy occur. The previous pain had been due to her unconscious resistance. Yoga, Taoism, Christian mysticism Zen, Sufism, Judo, and many other schools, have taught for thousands of years that most of man’s pain is because he resists Life, resists his own nature, destroys his own natural relationship with his own being.

However, let us be frank with each other. I am a man. I have never given birth to a child. I am only passing on to you the experience of other women. On the other hand, I have used these principles in my own life and seen what were pains in my emotional life become pleasures. I have not found perfect bliss, only an emerging maturity and pleasure in life. You who are reading this book are undoubtedly as much of an imperfect woman as I am an imperfect man. You too must have fears and tensions that create problems and unhappiness in your life as much as I have in mine – maybe less, maybe more. No doubt such inbuilt parts of one’s personality may not change overnight, and you may recognise that. You therefore say to yourself, ‘What point is there in me practising these methods? How much good will they do me in such a short time?’

You have to bring these questions to the surface and deal with them. Because if you do not they will undoubtedly be there inside you, interfering with the definite benefit you can obtain. My answers to these questions are quite simple. As I have said, I have not found perfect happiness, but I have found a degree of change that is satisfying. Even if a PERFECT childbirth did not result, at least you can achieve satisfying benefits, even in a short time.

On the other hand, I wish to lay particular importance on one thing. The woman I mentioned had practised no preparatory method at all, yet she experienced the secret wonder of birth. I am trying to impress you with the fact that you cannot know beforehand just how wonderfully successful you may be when the actual event occurs. Why? Because there is something in men and women which directs their conscious life. You can call it your Source, God, Superconscious, Self – but these are only words. Nevertheless, it has been the experience of people in all races and times that if they but relaxed their own will, fears, and desires, and gave themselves to this unknown factor in their life with open arms and heart, their faltering efforts were often made magnificent.

Co-operate with Life working in you

We have already, step by step, outlined the various blockages, such as in your breathing or genital tension, and shown how habits of relaxed and spontaneous feeling and activity can be cultivated. What I have said about resisting Life’s processes active in our being resulting as pain, and co-operation resulting as pleasure, shows once more how necessary these habits are for pleasurable childbirth. Earlier, in dealing with yoga postures, it was said that it is the uterus itself, not the abdominal muscles, which expel the baby. It was also said that we cannot directly exercise the muscles of the uterus as we can exercise the other muscles of our body. However, the Life processes we mentioned above do this for us in two ways. Firstly, when our body is well nourished and exercised generally, the tone and quality of muscles that are not directly used in the exercise is increased. This is because any single part of the body cannot help but partake of the standard of health of the body as a whole. Secondly, as the pregnancy advances, the uterus begins to ‘practise’ for the event. It does this by subtle contractions during the latter part of pregnancy. Many women do not notice these contractions, but if you watch carefully they will soon become obvious. One of the signs is that the abdomen becomes hard and taut. Another is the actual sensation of the uterus flexing itself.

It is around this natural fact that our method of relaxation during the actual birth will be built. For this reason I will point out certain things about it necessary to understand. A method called the ‘psycho-prophylactic’ technique of childbirth has been developed around becoming conscious of these pre-birth contractions. This was originated in Russia, became popular in France, and is now used by many practitioners. The aim is to have the woman realise that these contractions, which are exactly like birth contractions, are not painful. Of course, these contractions are not as frequent as those at birth, nor are they pushing the baby out through the birth canal. But through becoming aware of them, you can become assured that the contractions are not painful. The pain arises from resistance to the passing of the baby through the passage out of the uterus commonly known as the birth canal; or through muscular cramp due to insufficient calcium. Such resistance is called ‘genital tension’ during the actual contraction. This naturally stops the baby passing out quickly and easily. Here is a classical example of how our own tensions and fears can interfere with or block a ‘Life process’, thus causing pain. Therefore, our relaxation method will be entirely aimed at making you capable of relaxation during contraction, and developing the ability to cooperate with Life working in you.

Replace tension with relaxation

You are already learning this during the practices used with the postures. Now, during the relaxation we will take it much deeper. Therefore, after finishing your postures and any breathing practice, lie on your exercise blanket, arms at sides, knees drawn up. Make sure you are warm enough and out of any draught. The idea is to get used to the feeling of muscular contraction, and to build the habit of ‘going along with’ spontaneous body processes. As this is done, relaxation of all muscles and emotions not involved in the contraction or movement has to take place. Therefore we have to first learn what relaxation is. Technically it is the letting-go of all tension. In practice it is also the dropping of all personal conscious effort and resistance. It can be summed up in the words surrender and co-operation. Like anything else, if we do not have the ability to relax as a natural talent, we have to learn it, and some people are better at it than others.

Not only do we have to learn what relaxation is, but we also have to learn what tension is. By this I mean that very often we have not learnt to recognise the sensation of tension or relaxation in our body. Not being aware of these states, we may not realise that parts of our body are always tense, or how to drop this tension. Therefore our first step is to practise producing tension and relaxation at will. So, as you are resting on your blanket, with a small pillow under the hollow of your back if necessary, tense as much of your body as you can. You may find it helps to press your feet on the floor, clench your fists, bite your teeth together, and wrinkle your forehead. But make your body as tense as possible. This is muscular tension. Become aware of how it feels. Then slowly drop all the effort and allow your whole body to become loose and limp. Quickly pass your attention up your body to make sure all parts have dropped their effort. Particularly notice genitals, abdomen, neck, jaw, and forehead. Notice the feeling of relaxation.

Now tense your whole body again, but this time only half as much as before. Then slowly relax, passing the attention quickly over the body. Tense again, but this time so that there is only the feeling of tension; hardly a muscle moving. Drop the feeling of tension so the feeling of relaxation can replace it. Pass your attention once more over the body, making sure it is relaxed, and then bring your attention to your arms. Bring your hands up, fists clenched, to touch your shoulders, and tense all the muscles in your arms as hard as you can; but not so hard you cannot hold it for some time. (If your muscles cramp while you are tensing them it is probably because you need more calcium in your diet.

So increase your intake of milk, yoghurt, or bone meal tablets or kelp or calcium tablets. Calcium is best absorbed if vitamin D is present, either in the tablet or as cod liver oil.)

Now, while your arms are tense, pass your attention quickly over the rest of the body making sure it is all relaxed. Include the face and neck in this survey. If you have just begun the practice of this relaxation, include the breathing method described at the end of the last chapter. That is, practising breathing in the three levels. Then slowly relax the arms, rest for a while and repeat it twice more. If you have reached the point in pregnancy where you are aware of uterine contractions, then practise your relaxation while such a contraction occurs using the three breathing levels. Become as aware of it as possible, and relax all other parts of the body. The arms are being used as a substitute for contractions of the uterus, to enable you to relax all other -parts of the body during contractions. Contraction of one part of the body should not involve contraction of other parts not being used, but with many of us it does.

The next and final stage of the relaxation is a difficult one to induce artificially. As you can see, the first stage was to learn relaxation and tension; the second stage to enable you to maintain relaxation during contraction; and this third stage is an attempt to learn surrender or co-operation with a spontaneous movement or Life process, such as birth is. One of the few ways in which we can learn this outside of the actual event, apart from going along with pre-birth contractions, is as follows: After tensing the arms, rest for a moment until the arms feel normal, and then concentrate your attention on your breathing. Notice the rise and fall of your chest, but do not let your attention interfere with the natural cycle and movement of your breathing. If your attention wanders, bring it back, if necessary, time and time again. After about a minute, just as your inhalation has reached its peak, consciously interfere with your breathing by holding your breath. As you are doing this, watch your sensations intently. Soon an urge or desire to breathe out will arise. Resist it and see the feelings of discomfort begin to increase. If you continued this resistance the feelings of discomfort would soon become acute pain. When the discomfort is obvious, relax your resistance and let the breathing become normal. Make sure once more that your body is relaxed and return your attention to your breathing. This time, as you have breathed out, hold your breath again for a time, then continue breathing; relax the body and return attention to breathing.

In doing this, it can be directly seen that discomfort and then pain is a direct result of interfering with a Life process. We are of course, here interfering consciously and on purpose. In many cases where we interfere with the innate processes of our being, it is done unintentionally and without realising it. It can also be seen that when we drop our interference, the discomfort disappears and the process continues. In childbirth most discomfort and pain is the result of a similar process.

Unconscious tension interferes with the birth process. Or else, the feeling of internal stretching, which would have been only discomfort, has become a pain because the discomfort was resisted by tension and fear. This method of relaxation is to make you very aware of (a) interfering with a natural process, and (6) relaxing the interference and allowing the process to continue. But we have to take this a stage farther, the reason for this next stage being that most tension in childbirth is due to unconscious fears or habits of tense reaction to discomfort. But what exactly do I mean by that? I have already mentioned my wife’s experience of being nearly drowned, and the fact that she now dislikes water. Some people may dread going on boats, or in water, and not know why. If the dread was caused by a babyhood experience of being submerged in bath water, which incident they cannot remember, this is an example of an unconscious fear. It is a fear that arises from factors outside of our present remembrance.

As for ‘tense reaction to discomfort’, this is like the person with a rotten and painful tooth being unwilling to pass through the discomfort and suffering of having the tooth removed. They thus endure the more prolonged pain of its aching. So it is that sometimes, by withholding or tensing against the discomfort of stretching, it is turned into a pain. Therefore our relaxation aims at developing the ability to let go of our fears and habits, and so allow the process to continue unhampered. To do this we have to be able to surrender, or relax, our whole being. This process has been started in your practice of the postures.

The Life process which causes you to be

Our next step, after interfering with our breathing and then dropping this interference, should thus be as follows. Keep your attention concentrated on the process of your breathing without any interference whatsoever. Realise that something’ of which you are not aware is causing this activity of your chest. We will simply call this the Life process which causes you to be in short, Life.

If this is to be successful, you must make such thoughts very clear and real to yourself. Really think about the subject. Realise now that your heartbeat, digestion, and recuperation are all expressions of this same Life. While relaxing, dwell for a few moments on the thought that your whole body, and the forming body of the baby, is due to Life.

These realisations have to be thought out slowly at first, and step by step, to lead us where we wish to get. The next step after considering your body and its functions as an expression of Life is to turn your attention away from your breathing, to your self your own awareness. Despite the fact that nothing seems as real as our own existence, when we actually attempt to look at self, nothing is more difficult, or seems more obscure. However, we are not attempting higher metaphysical analysis here, we are dealing with the very practical subject of spontaneous childbirth the healthy, happy process of all your being working harmoniously And pleasurably together to produce your baby. So in looking at self, all I am asking is for you to realise that your very awareness as a conscious being is also the result of Life, just as your breathing and digestion are.

Having seen that you would not exist outside of this something, this process we have called Life, realise that it holds within itself the very wisdom of what you are. It is you. Therefore, not only does it have the wisdom but also the fantastic power that has caused us to exist. Yet this wisdom, this power, may be quite unknown to us quite unconscious. In fact, it may only become conscious as we become aware of it, or discover it in our own life and being.

Don’t worry if this seems very complex at present. Do not be concerned if you cannot understand some of it. Take what you can grasp, and pass on. The rest should be allowed to rise gradually. Meanwhile simply put it to one side if it does not make sense to you.

Despite the fact that your body and awareness of yourself, all your functions in fact, have been brought into existence by the unconscious power and wisdom of Life, and thus you are totally dependent upon it, yet you have a relationship with it, not being merely a puppet. You have already seen how you can interfere with your breathing. This is a simple example indeed of how you can impose your will upon Life. But everything you do is influencing what is, after all, your innate being. Your actions either enhance or subdue, aid to unfold or repress its qualities, conflict or co-operate with your own being. F9r instance, what you eat either supplies or denies the needs of this process you are. What we think or feel either express and satisfy its energies and wisdom, or twist them into dissatisfaction and pain – and so on through our whole life. Religion presents you with the question: ‘Are you for or against God?’ Yoga asks a different question: ‘Are you for or against yourself?’ For if we live in conflict with the very process which is our own being, we are against ourselves and suffer the consequences.

What is Life?

Having come this far we are near the end of our journey. We have seen something of Life and our relationship with it. But what is it?

This is a very important question for a number of reasons. It is obvious from what has already been said that our aim is to not only surrender but to actively co-operate with Life in the search for a spontaneous childbirth. (The term ‘spontaneous childbirth’ is used to denote a pleasurable birth due to all parts of one’s being co-operating.) Therefore we have to know what we are co-operating with. Many people give up their relaxation practice in discouragement because they have never been able to define this very question. This discouragement is undoubtedly due to their expectation of the wrong things. The resulting disappointment is a natural deterrent. Therefore, to avoid the disappointment, let us make sure you are on firm ground, in firm contact, with that which constitutes you. Or at least, let us make sure your expectations are aimed at practical issues.

Basically there are just two ways of realising Life. One is by realising the results of its activity. Thus, when we experience our spontaneous breathing or childbirth or consciousness, we are knowing the results of its working. The other way is by being it. That is, by there being no differentiation between consciousness and that which produces it. This is yoga, or union between Life and that which arises from it.

For the practical purposes of our relaxation, however, the method of knowing it through its results is sufficient. The last stage of our relaxation therefore resolves itself as follows: Having watched your breathing, held it in, and then relaxed your interference and body; having watched your breathing and seen it as an expression of Life, and realised that you would not exist without it; having seen that nevertheless you have a relationship with it of co-operation or denial then decide to surrender your whole being to its own natural processes, so that any unconscious or conscious interferences may be smoothed away and harmony result. Do this by letting go, by dropping any ideas, attitudes, prejudices, you may have. While doing this hold the attention on your face and head. Allow any facial tensions or expressions to slip away. Bringing the attention to the chest, let go of any emotions of fear, anger, hate, worry, or in fact any emotions, even of affection, love. Let go of all. Now relax the genitals and let go of your hold on your sexual feelings.

Simply rest now for some minutes in the general feeling of relaxation. make a mental picture of the line of light passing through your body and irradiating every part of it. Let yourself go into this light which is a symbol of Life, meanwhile repeating mentally, surrender to Life.’ Say it over and over, bring your attention back if it wanders, time and time again. If restlessness, emotions tremblings, crying, or worries come up, do not attempt to push them aside or resist them. This only leads to struggle and internal fight. Just let them happen. On the other hand, do not let them stop the period of relaxation. Let them come up and out, but watch them as if you were standing to one side watching somebody else struggle. Realise that they are things happening to you they are not you! The real you is the thing that experiences all this multitude of changing thoughts and feelings. If you believe your emotions are you, they will carry you away like a twig in a swirling stream. But if you see them simply as events you are experiencing, they lose their control of you.

The relaxation should be practised every day. It may be best done just before getting into bed, as this is the one time of day there is always opportunity to do it, as you can always go to bed a few minutes later. The aim is to get the habit so established t hat you can easily use the ‘handing over’ or relaxation during the baby’s birth. The frequent practice will also help to free you of’ inbuilt tensions and problems before the big event occurs. As I have already said, do not expect perfection of yourself. Even our perfect handing over can still allow that wisdom and power which creates us to help us and lead us harmoniously through the birth. You learn to notice whether you are interfering or co-operating with the activities that arise from Life, which readies you for spontaneous childbirth, wherein your conscious self co-operates with the unknown forces of your being in this wonder of creation.

The method of relaxation

For easy reference we will list the method of relaxation point by point:

Make yourself comfortable on your exercise blanket, or in an easy chair. Make sure you are warm enough.
Tense your whole body as hard as possible. Slowly relax. Pass your attention over your body relaxing each part, particularly the forehead, jaw, neck, abdomen and genitals.
Tense your whole body once more, but this time only half as much as before. Slowly relax and pass the attention over the body as before.
Tense the whole body once more, but so slightly that there is only the feeling of tension. Release it until there is the feeling of relaxation. Again pass the attention over the body.
Bring the attention to the arms. Clench the fists and bring the hands to the shoulders, tensing all the muscles in the arms. As you hold this tension in the arms relax all the other parts of the body, and practice the breathing method of using the breath levels. If you are near the end of term and have a uterine contraction, use this instead of the arms. That is, relax the whole body while the uterus contracts.
Concentrate your attention on your breathing without interfering. After about a minute, hold your breath in until it becomes uncomfortable. Release it and let the breathing become normal. Make sure your body is relaxed, then do the same, holding the breath out. When uncomfortable, allow normal breathing to continue.
As you watch your breathing, realise it is an expression of the Life process that causes you to be.
Realise that your whole being, body, and mind, and forming baby, are entirely results of Life, and your relationship with it.
Realise that you relate to Life either in a co-operative or negative manner.
Decide to co-operate with your own innate being-, and surrender thinking, emotions, and passions, by letting go of them. Then visualise the light filling your body, and you handing over to it, meanwhile repeating mentally: ‘Surrender to Life’

Relaxation is more than just a practice of lying and tensing one’s body and then dropping the tension. I believe this becomes obvious from what has already been said. Relaxation is also living and acting in accordance with one 5 own being. But before we leave this subject, I would like to go a little farther into some of the issues raised.

We have postulated for instance that whatever it is, whatever factor or factors causes us to exist, we depend upon it. We have also said that this results in something of an innate being. As an example, a rose seed would find it difficult to grow into a dandelion. It is innately a rose. All the forces in the seed conspire to produce a rose. Similarly, we have certain innate directions, and if. we frustrate them we suffer inner conflict and dissatisfaction. We cannot say, however, that everybody’s inner directions are the same. So we cannot form a set of rules all must follow, and create a new religious dogma. We can only say that it seems necessary to discover one’s own innate needs and direction and attempt to comply with them. It appears as a logical conclusion that this is the only way we can be whole people, at peace with ourselves and the world. For if we are at odds with our own nature, we are more than likely to be at odds with others. The method we have given of relaxation is just one of the ways we can attempt to find unity within ourselves. As a mother-to-be it is essential to seek this unity between the known and unknown parts of your nature; between the voluntary and involuntary parts of your being, because much of birth depends upon the efficient working of involuntary muscles, on chemical changes, glandular activity, and so on. These are all parts of your being you may be at odds with due to tensions, fears, personality traits, and attitudes. As parenthood is also a creative process, an expression of forces that have exteriorised your own body, you can similarly co-operate or disrupt these creative processes.

Needs and deprivations

You may consider such points arguable, and I am not denying you the right to disagree. One thing, however, that I believe most of us have to accept is the innate needs of. the body, even if we will not admit the innate needs of the soul and spirit. Our experience with holding the breath is an immediate demonstration of the body’s innate need for air. But some of the body’s needs are not as immediately noticeable as this. The same applies of course to our innate emotional, mental and spiritual needs. Our needs in these directions, unless they cry out to us as savagely as our need for air, may easily be ignored. But it is true that some of these subtle needs do cry out. After all, our need for air is barely noticeable during the day and night unless we interfere, or are placed in conditions halting this supply. Then we may experience struggle, pain, even terror, as in drowning. Similarly, these other needs are also barely noticeable until we, or circumstances, place us in positions of deprivation. Then it is that physical, mental or emotional pain, or terror, may assert themselves, as in nervous breakdown’ or depression. For these are the voices of our being telling us of needs, of deprivation. Such a need may be as simple as taking more relaxation, or as complex as unlocking our love, that it may pour into our marriage.

As this book attempts to be a practical one, the question therefore has to be asked: ‘How can we recognise our innate needs of body, soul and spirit before they become symptoms of pain?’

Our chapter on diet dealt with general dietary needs; the chapter on postures with general means of satisfying the need for exercise. But we each may have very personal needs. In the practice of relaxation some of these needs may be met. For instance, you may have had too tight a hold on your feelings and the relaxation can release them. Or else tears of grief or loneliness may have been bottled up, and the relaxation allows them expression. Relaxation also is a time of quiet when Life can act upon us and balance our nature, gradually realign emotions and attitudes, and work on us generally in innumerable ways. At such times things we have left undone, such as words of encouragement to a friend, the dropping of anger that has caused conflict between ourselves and another person, a promise unkept, may arise to consciousness to remind us that we cannot find peace, we cannot relax, while such things exist in our life. Sometimes it is like an inner voice, often very real; or an inner realisation of some clarity, that helps us to see our innate needs. Such things occur far more frequently during relaxation simply because our attention is not immersed in outer impressions and activities. Other people have vivid mental pictures or daydreams often of a symbolical nature, that advise them of their inner nature. These are all means by which Life may express its needs to our awareness. The fact that it sometimes appears as a voice, or pictures, or as a teacher, is simply because of the way the mind works. Just as our feelings may clothe themselves in words when we express them, so these unconscious forces may clothe themselves in images; symbols, colours or words, which arise from within us. This is why dreams are such a helpful way of discovering our inner nature if we go to the trouble of learning their symbolical language.

Thus, in saying that relaxation and peace in life arise from living in harmony with our own complete nature to the best of our capability, we can already begin to see ways of aiding this process. As this book has to keep closely to the aim of dealing only with what can be used with practical advantage by the mother-to-be, I will deal but briefly with what we have covered.

Relaxation. Having already covered this, nothing more will be said. For those with a religious temperament, however, prayer, meditation and worship are also means of what we have called ‘relaxation’. That is, the way of growing unity between what has caused us to be, and what we are. Whether we call our cause, God, or Source, or Life, or anything else, matters not at all, for it remains what it is whatever we call it or think of it. As the voice said to Moses: ‘I am that I am.

Pain. Whether this is physical, emotional or mental, it is a signal that something is ‘not well’ in our being. When it becomes severe physical illness, mental breakdown or emotional agony we have been misapplying our life for a long period. It is far better to take notice of the little pain than press on regardless towards our own sickness. Pain is a message. Sometimes it is easy to understand if we but stop and listen to it and attempt to see what is causing it. At other times it is more difficult to interpret or understand its meaning, in which case we should seek professional help wherever possible. For the doctor has been trained to interpret the messages of physical pain; and the counsellor or psychiatrist to interpret the emotional and mental ones. For some people these are not their chosen source of help, but at least they should go to their own chosen ones.

Appetites. These are another way in which our being, physical and mental, announces its needs. In a very real sense the unrest or desire to breathe is an expression of our ‘appetite’ for air. Appetites express themselves in numerous different ways, announcing needs such as hunger for food, desire for sexual intercourse, thirst for water, tiredness for rest, search for knowledge, longing for love, wanting to play. All these announce needs we must be careful to fulfil, but also careful not to glut. Fortunately, feelings within us quickly tell us what is enough or too much, if we but listen.

The inner voice. The action of an inner voice’ becomes far less of a mystery if we but understand something of our own being. Most of us realise for instance that we can only recall a very small part of the information stored in our memory. The other enormous mass of facts, insights, experiences, lessons, nevertheless still exists ready to respond in times of need. Such response may be subtle, but it is still clear enough if we listen. As an adult we probably cannot remember the first time we burnt our fingers on something hot. But even though we cannot recall the event, or events, the voice of experience still speaks to us clearly through the urge to avoid heat. Similarly, the mass of our experience will talk to us not in a logical process or memory, but as an urge, or seemingly irrational feeling or impulse. While, through our reasoning, we may decide that our car is fit for a long journey, we may have an irrational feeling it is going to break down. If we attempted to listen to this feeling and discover where it has arisen from, we might, for the sake of argument, find that it centres around an engine noise we had not been conscious of. Now we realise it indicates a similar fault that caused a breakdown in the past.

Sometimes this intuitive voice becomes so defined in action that it seems as if our total experience actually talks to us. This is undoubtedly the inner voice that Socrates spoke of. Not only does it arise from our total past experience, but also from a contact with the unconscious processes of our being.

If we consider for a moment, there is nothing at all strange about this process of inner guidance or direction. Virtually every moment of the day we are being moved or influenced by subtle feelings of desire for pleasure, security, longing for love, food, comfort, need for assurance, encouragement, urge to know, and so on and on. If you analysed a day’s activities, even such simple acts as going out with a friend, going to the toilet, being late for work, choosing a book from the library, you would find all of them were influenced by particular feelings or urges pushing you to comply. It is only because some people train themselves to listen intently to themselves, or have a particular type of make-up, that the voice becomes so clear. If it is mental images we see instead of a voice, these are best understood as dreams due to their often symbolical nature.

It is folly, however, to think of such a voice as an all-seeing oracle. The urges that arise in us may be the voice of our fear or ambition, or sexual desire. So we have to use some discrimination in deciding whether the voice is representative of our whole being, or just an urge from a split-off energy such as some sexuality is. Also, the voice should only be a guide, never a master. Cautious experiment with following its advice will soon decide its source. For its results are its best judge. ‘By their fruits ye shall know them.’

Even so, thousands of ordinary and extraordinary men and women have discovered wise counsel in their own inner voice. It can guide us in every department of our life, from diet to religion, sexual relationship to business details. Examples will be mentioned under ‘Dreams’.

Dreams. All the things I have mentioned above are ways in which we may come to a closer awareness of Life, its wisdom, power and love. (As the faculties of our nature emerge from Life, not only intelligence and energy are expressions of its nature, but love also.) In this way we may meet pregnancy, and in fact life, more fully and satisfyingly. Dreams have been used as a means of self-help and self-understanding throughout all known history. They were also used for the same purpose by some branches of yoga. Patanjali, in his Yoga Aphorisms, which is one of the accepted yoga classics, mentions them as such.

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It is obvious that I cannot go into a lengthy discussion of dreams, but possibly enough can be given to help you understand some of the most useful dreams that occur during pregnancy.

Often, the most immediately practical or useful dreams are in fact easily understood. For instance, during pregnancy my wife dreamed that she should take iron and calcium tablets. There was nothing symbolic about the dream, although many people would overlook it or ignore it. She took the tablets and her health greatly improved. She later dreamed she should do certain of the yoga postures. Again nothing mysterious or symbolic. Again she followed the advice. It is interesting that the birth of the baby took only two hours.

Other women dream that they should eat particular foods, or ease up on certain activities, take a particular vitamin, and so on. In many cases these dreams are not at all symbolical, but straight statements. Other dreams, equally practical, may be slightly or wholly symbolical. Such dreams may still deal with the basis of diet, exercise, rest, work, and so on, but in most cases will probably be concerned with our relationships with others and our own inner condition of emotions, attitudes, or else in some cases how you can best ready yourself as a parent, to bring in to the world a beautiful child. Or else who the child is that is being born, and even what sex.

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Relaxation

Relaxation is an Art

The Practice of Relaxation

So to begin our practice we must learn to recognise tension and relaxation throughout our being. Let us begin then with a primary exercise in this direction. Either lie on a carpeted floor out of draughts (under a blanket if necessary, as it is less distracting to keep reasonably warm), or sit in a straight backed chair, with the hips well back. Do not sag in the chair but be erect. Practice will make this easy and yet comfortable.

Having found a place where you will not be disturbed for half an hour, and having settled yourself, loosen all tight clothing. Collars, belts, under garments, should all be loose, shoes removed so the body is unrestricted. Sit for a few moments letting the thoughts and activities that have occupied you die down. Resolve firmly to keep your attention wholly on the practice during the allotted time, no matter what the distraction. Then wait patiently for the feeling of readiness to begin to grow in you, and urge you to commence. Should other opposite feelings arise, put them aside again and again, until that pleasant desire to go on into relaxation arrives. Think of it as a friend you are waiting for, or the right moment. To force oneself into the practice without this friend, usually results in a great expenditure of nervous energy without any reward. Wait then, for the spontaneous desire to begin, even if it takes a week, or a month, for even this is leading you deeper into relaxation. Do not forget that you are waiting, and what for.

When that feeling arrives, bring your attention to your legs. Tense the muscles in the legs as hard as you can without discomfort or cramp. If you find this difficult, press your legs together, or against the floor, to produce the tenseness in the muscles. Hold the tension for a moment, watching the sensation it produces, then slowly let go of the tension. Allow the sensations in the legs to sink to the other extreme. While the legs are tense, there is a feeling of effort and rigidity. Now let those feelings be replaced by effortlessness and limpness. If you experience cramp by doing this see – Calcium, Magnesium, Zinc and Vitamin D Plus Vitamin K2 MK-7 Tablets – Osteo Supplement – Vegan Tablets not Capsules 180 Count – Made in The UK by YrHealth : Amazon.com: Health & Personal Care

When the effortlessness and limpness become distinct, tense the legs again, but this time not quite to hard. Hold it, noticing the feelings, then slowly drop again to the other extreme. As you do so, notice the feeling of dropping-that feeling of tension slipping away. Go through this about seven to ten times, tensing less each time. At the end there should be only the feeling of tension, and the feeling of relaxation. For a few times, hardly moving the muscles, let this feeling of tension and relaxation alternate. Then in turn, go through the whole process again with the hips and waist, chest, arms, neck, head and face.

Once you have reached the head, start again at the legs. This time however, instead of tensing the muscles, merely become aware of each part in turn, dropping away any tension that remains. In this way, become aware of the foot and its sensations of weight, shape, clothing, and tension. Then allow the feeling of dropping to take place. Thus go all over the body, time and time again, until your allotted time has elapsed.

For the best results, practise at least once, or if you have time, twice each day. Give yourself at least a month of practice before either passing onto the next method or stopping. After a month you should find that a fine degree of recognition of the state of tension exists. At this time you may not have noticed any of the results mentioned already, but you will almost certainly have noticed certain other things like the great restlessness of our thoughts and feelings. Inability to hold the attention to any one subject may also tempt you into believing you are inadequate to the task. This is not so. You may never before have trained the attention to hold steady, but with practice it will improve. Usually you also begin to notice during this time, just how tense you are, The tension of the arms and shoulders while driving may be noticed for the first time, or else how stiffly we hold ourselves while sitting or meeting strangers. Do not be dismayed. Slowly these tensions can be dropped away until we are free of them.

The relaxation methods by themselves will be adequate unless the tensions are very deep seated. Also certain inner experiences may have occurred. You may have already had a glimpse of the wonderful living peace of relaxation. When it comes it is unmistakable. It is more thrilling even than one’s first passionate kiss; as moving as a sudden glimpse into the depths of the universe, but how can one describe it?

The Experience of Relaxation

For different people the experience comes in different ways. Some feel as if they are falling into a vast and utter blackness – a vivid sparkling blackness darker than anything ever seen before. As one falls there is the sensation of losing all shape and bodily form, of becoming enormous.

Some people become quite frightened, fearing that they are dying, or will not come back, for there is the very real feeling of slipping into a strange new world. Many take this in their stride however, and feel great joy and release in the experience, wishing to do it again and again. Others do not see the darkness, but see a dawning light into which they merge, and again lose feelings of shape and form. With some, the ecstasy is so much that the bliss shows on their face like sunlight and radiance.

Some find themselves floating and relaxed, warm and strange, while a few find that the long held feelings of grief and misery break out, now the defences have been relaxed, and tears and sobbing shake the body. In these cases, if at all possible, the tears should be allowed to flow, until one has released them all, and is free. Although with some this takes a long time and is best done with a therapist of some sort. I mention the therapist only because some people are afraid of their own grief, and need a helping hand.

In most cases however, learning relaxation will be like climbing a mountain. Sometimes the views are wonderful, and an elevated view of the world is gained, but it is hard work. Paradoxically, the hard work is in learning to do nothing, to give up effort and be still. Once there, there is no effort attached to it at all, but getting there often requires all we have. Even if we have experienced the liberation of deep relaxation, it is in virtually every case, only a glimpse. We experience it while our being is temporarily quiescent through practice of a particular discipline. While we are no longer practising the discipline, the influence of the experience is largely lost. Only a fragrance of it remains. In other words, in everyday life we may still be nervous, irritable, thoughtless or insecure. While experiencing deep relaxation it will seem as if we have risen above all the causes of these things within us. For a time they no longer exist for us, but in “climbing down” to earth or our usual self again, they disappear. Yet the vision of what we have seen remains in our memory, and we know at least, that it is possible to exist in a different way. See Lucidity

Deep relaxation, if experienced only the once, will still have subtly changed us in many ways. Of course, we can attempt to totally forget or distort it. In many ways, however, we can never be quite the same. We have seen for ourselves that our consciousness can exist radiantly clear and joyous beyond the bounds of the body and its senses. We have seen also that many of the things in life to which we attach so much importance, can be seen from a totally different viewpoint. To an outside observer we may appear to be as we always have been, even to ourselves we may seem unchanged. Every strong experience however, changes us slightly.

Not until we have had the experience of deep relaxation do we really know what we are searching for. Even afterwards we will not properly understand or appreciate until much more of life teaches us its value. If we continue our practice, however, the task before us is one of widening the trail we have made until it is a road. It lies in making an everyday fact of this unusual experience. The experience is an exciting thing, but it is only when we can make real in our everyday life the things we have seen in our vision, that they become transforming realities.

We must accept as valid and real the things we glimpse. Imagine that one’s conscious self is one’s point of experiencing life. It can experience only one thing at a time, and is much influenced by the situation of the moment. Think of the part of ourselves seen in relaxation

(that is deep relaxation when we have gone beyond the point of reacting to our fears and pains) as being the sum total of all our experience. It is also the source of our emotions and instinct and is in contact with the controlling factors of our being. We must therefore think of it as expressing a more essential or total expression of ourselves than is usually possible by our conscious sell. To be guided by it (not controlled) is a means of finding a more complete satisfaction. For this reason our intuition should be carefully consulted. In following the outworking of our karma through the practice of Yoga there can be no surer guide than our own intuition.

The Second Method

Having practised the preceding method of relaxation for some time, it may be found helpful to pass on to the method about to be explained. The method that follows is an extension of the last, and cannot properly be practised unless the other has been already used. It consists of very quickly passing the attention over the body, without the preliminaries of tensing and relaxing. Do this lying or sitting as before. The aim of this is to drop any obvious muscular tensions still in the body. Then, when one has reached the head, keep the attention there. Concentrate on the forehead, wrinkling the brow as much as possible but instead of making this simply a physical tension, make it an emotional one also.

This it quite easy to do when properly understood. We are doing it all day in fact, just as we are all day tensing muscularly. We find, however, that muscular tension is nearly always the follower of emotional tension. Thus, if we have not dropped our emotional tensions, we have not been able to drop our deepest physical tensions. The large muscle groups of the body may be quite limp while a nervous or emotional tension still exists so that the viscera, heart, arteries and vital organs will be operating under unconscious tension.

Getting back to tensing emotionally however, one uses the wrinkled forehead as a focus. Imagine that it is wrinkled because one is feeling apprehensive. Use any existing worries, (financial, sexual, or social) that one may have to deepen this experience of apprehension. Allow the whole face and body to be influenced by the mood one is conjuring. Then, when it becomes reasonably pronounced, gently drop it away from the face and the whole body, as if it were a muscular tension. Now, using the face and forehead again, express fear in a similar way. It will probably be found that whereas apprehension or worry wrinkles the forehead, fear pulls it tight and smooth, tensing the muscles at the temples hard (and that is one of the causes of headaches in this area).

Again, drop the whole mood and tension gently away into relaxation when it has been experienced, or made conscious. Next, see if you can similarly express anger, and then drop it away. Follow this with expressions of pain, grief, or any of the emotions that are commonly experienced.

When this has been done there may be time left of the allotted period. This should be used by still holding the attention to the face, rectum and anus and then dropping away any and all emotions expressed with it. Some emotions are so much with us that they have become graven upon our face and body. This is like an emotional dirt that has become grimed into our form. Whereas `we usually wash ourselves daily to clean away physical dirt (or even several times a day on exposed areas) we seldom cleanse this inner grime of fears and feelings. Here is one of the practical issues underlying the origins of daily washing and daily praying. It makes us clean again, and puts us in harmony with the sources of our life.

Relaxing the Emotions as Well as The Body

Once one feels more at home with this method, and begins to appreciate its aims and results, a slightly more ambitious programme can be attempted. After the preliminaries of dropping obvious physical and emotional tensions, ask yourself whether you are still harbouring resentments. Are you, in fact, at peace with the world, in the sense of forgiveness? Also, what pains in our life are still with us unresolved. Are we still suffering deep within us the insecurity of an early loneliness, the terror being abandoned or of a medical operation, the guilt of a taboo desire? Resolve to suffer these hidden pains, that they may be surfaced and after practising these methods of relaxation, and noting the results, certain principles will be seen. One of the most significant being that relaxation is the absence of personal effort. One might even call it the absence of ego.

Thus, it must be constantly remembered that one does not try to relax – that would be a contradiction. All the methods aim at gradually relinquishing efforts arising from the ego, such as muscular, emotional or mental tensions. The act of relinquishing the ego, even for a few moments, requires a very precise positioning of all one’s desires, instincts, habits, drives, fears and ideas, The truth of this will be seen by anyone who attempts it. Therefore, many of these methods aim, not at giving us the experience of unconditional existence, but at putting us in the right internal position to receive it. All things being right, when one opens one’s eyes, one cannot help but see. So also when one has the right stage of being – egolessness – one cannot help but experience the unconditional.

It is helpful to hold this in mind when hoping to experience the deepest stages of relaxation. Relaxation is the absence of personal effort. That is conscious union with the unconditional. To find this union “ego efforts” have to be dropped. `Therefore we cannot make efforts of the ego to find it. This means that we have to give up our personal effort or desire to find it, in order to find it. This is because such efforts and desires arise from our ego, which has to be relinquished to experience the unconditional, for the unconditional always exists as the deepest strata of our being.

However, do not worry if such words are beyond present understanding. The benefits of using the methods are so great, that it is folly to give them up because we do not understand how they occur. This would be like giving up breathing because we do not understand a scientist’s explanation of how the air is used by our body.

The next method is again an extension of the previous ones. Likewise, it should only be practised after their use. It is a further stage in dropping those things in us preventing realisation of relaxation.

As before, pass the attention quickly over the body dropping obvious tensions. Then bring the attention to the hips and abdomen. Now realise that in this general area we focus our sexual passions and physical hunger. The yearning for food and sexual pleasure are felt most keenly here.

Call to mind any difficulties one has with this area of one’s feelings. Do not attempt to decide the wrongness or rightness of such feelings. No attempt is being made to decide what is proper or improper. Merely call to mind as clearly as possible one’s sexual and physical hungers, in whatever way they express, then drop them as if they were muscular tensions.

Bring the attention next to the chest and throat generally. This area of our body we can take as representing our feelings. By this is meant the way we feel about our job, our situation in life, our capabilities, friends and enemies, parents, health and so on. `Think of all these as a great bundle of feelings, and again let go as if they were muscular tensions.

Once more, no attempt is made to decide whether or not one it justified in feeling such, or whether right or wrong. In fact the right and wrong, pleasurable and painful, are all dropped, together. Neither should any feeling be thrust aside or pushed down out of consciousness as if being fought off. This is decidedly against the aims of this practice and such methods will not result in relaxation. They may produce a mental or emotional silence, but certainly not a peace of mind or experience of Yoga (union). One cannot push tensions away, physical or emotional. The effort to push them away only produces a further tension.

It can only be done by a letting go. If a tension remains after one has let go of one’s effort to maintain it, it is only because there is good reason or cause for it. In our practice, as already explained, first the emotion, then the cause, come to consciousness. Once the cause is realised in this way, the motion naturally ceases, whether it is restlessness, constant desire to eat, fearfulness, or irritability. To stifle such feelings is like stifling our natural warning system of pain, or muffling a fire bell.

After the chest, bring the attention to the head. This part of our body we can associate with our ideas, our thoughts, our opinions about things, our reasoning. Bring to consciousness some of one’s opinions about oneself, about life, and so on. Bring up one’s religious beliefs or lack of them, examine thoughts about ambitions, then let go of them as if they were muscular tensions. Drop them alt away, good or bad, true or false.

Now we come to the climax of the whole of these series or practices-the full-blooded launching into the unconditional. Remember that the ego, or self-awareness is the result of many factors. To think of it as us in the most permanent sense is an illusion. The light from an electric bulb is the result of the electricity interacting with the bulb. The light can disappear if switched off or the bulb damaged. Similarly, from the inner viewpoint, our awareness of self is the result of the biological interaction of matter and energy, life and our body. Just as light is invisible and colourless until it touches a material surface, so is this energy, or life, unmanifest until it acts upon a body. When we look within us, we usually see only the results of life interacting with the body through consciousness of feeling, hearing, tasting, smelling, seeing, knowing and emotions etc. The Yoga doctrines say that life is like a mirror, in its interaction with the body it reflects all the impressions of our senses. Thus, when we look into the mirror, we see only the reflections of our experiences, not the mirror itself. But in gradually dropping away all the images, the results, we are left with only the mirror, we come to know what IS – the basis of our being and all life. Life itself.

Of course this is easier said than done, but any step towards awareness of this, is a step towards wholeness. Therefore, having dropped passions, emotions and thoughts as well us you can, look inwards at what is going on. Then look beyond the remaining thoughts and feelings, asking yourself, “What is it that is aware of these thoughts and feelings?”

Restlessness is only in one’s thoughts and emotions. If one looks, there is always that which is non-active yet gives rise to all our activity. Look into the mirror of self, as it were, and look past the images to shining invisible Self. Or as the Bible says, “Be still, and know that I am God.”

Something I learned The Hard Way

When I started teaching relaxation/surrender, it was as a yoga teacher. Some of those yoga classes I taught were huge back in the sixties and seventies. To help people I would wander around the class and lift an arm or leg of some of those lying quietly relaxed. I lifted the limb to let the person have an enhanced awareness of their relaxed condition. What amazed me was that often the arm or leg was so rigid with tension it was hard to move. If I let go the limb would remain suspended, even a leg. On asking the person how they felt they would say, ‘Fine. Really relaxed.’ They didn’t know they were carrying enormous tensions.

Are you relaxing or suppressing?

It took me a while to realise what that indicated. You could relax surface muscles and feelings, but a mass of tensions were unconscious. Later I learned that such tensions had often arisen from difficult or traumatic past experiences, still locked in the body and emotions. By using relaxation techniques such as dropping the tension of the voluntary muscles or meditating on positive things, those inner tensions were being pushed back into the unconscious – undealt with. When left at that point, relaxation and meditation were a method of suppression and control, not of healing.

With shock I realised this was true of many things that were supposed to be helpful, such as meditation and positive thinking. What they often did was to calm surface feelings by controlling thoughts and body. They did not deal with the real difficulties that had been pushed into the unconscious. Their purpose was to quieten the conscious mind and the voluntary movements of the body, not release unconscious tensions. See Psychological Vomiting

Background to the Practice

To be relaxed is a blessed thing. It is reminiscent of a beautiful ship riding easily through the roughest seas. Certainly it is moved by the great waves, certainly it responds sensitively to each wind and current, but at the same time it can choose its course and hold its own against them.

Relaxation is one of the results of a successful life. Through it one is enabled to accept the many things, good and bad, that a full life brings. Through it also, one can initiate changes when felt necessary. This is because, through it, one has reached a degree of the unconditional state mentioned. Through it one can drop away many of the things that destroy the harmony of our lives, the things that ruin our relationships with others, or destroy our ability to give of our best. Without any other philosophy, Yoga relaxation can help to find wisdom and understanding in rising to life’s challenges.

When explaining this method of relaxation I have often been asked, “Is there not a danger of losing one’s personality, of becoming too passive and weak a character?” Yet this is a very strange question considering that our follies are committed largely out of momentary passions, desires, fears or ambitions over which we have little control, or unconscious drives which escape our notice. Even the inactivity of the spineless easily led” person, does not arise from passivity of power but from the restrictions of their own inability. It is only the very strong, resilient men or women who can make their own decision whether to act or not. Most of us are moved to act, only to regret it later. Only at a later date may we recognise that it was petty vanity, selfishness or sexual desire, that led us. Even thinking is often regrettable, for we reason from a lack of information rather than full knowledge. From the Yoga point of view, only activity arising from our whole nature will satisfy us and lead to happiness. When any partial system rules, such as our passions and appetites, emotions or reasoning, we will not be wholly satisfied with ourselves. See

It is when we become whole in some degree, we enjoy the feeling or experience we call relaxation. So relaxation it not only a practice but something we experience also.

The fact that we call this “complete relaxation,” means simply that it is more inclusive in its aims than general relaxation. General relaxation tends to concern itself exclusively with the muscular system, and sometimes the emotions and breathing. Inclusiveness sees this as the expressions of something vaster (our whole nature-The All), the experience of which will atone satisfy us fully. It is interesting to note that Sutherland in his book “Teach Yourself Relaxation,” even says at the end that the deepest stages of relaxation must be studied in religion.

It is not that one necessarily has to study any of the religious tenets; quite the reverse. It is through experiencing the deeper parts of our nature in the practice of relaxation, that we begin to understand the stark practicality of some religions texts.

This gives only a very poor idea of the difficulties in finding ourselves fully. At least there are other more immediate benefits to be derived in that we may be released from unwanted tension; be given great freedom from feelings of self-consciousness, loneliness, fear and depression; may derive more benefit from our periods of rest and have greater ability to concentrate.

The Difficulties

Before we even begin an explanation of the method however, it is as well to know a little of what confronts us. In the first place, learning relaxation is not any easier than learning other things – musical instrument for instance. It demands our attention, our time, our devotion. To attain something in this realm may take as many years as it does to become a doctor or an artist. At the same time a little practice, while it may not take us to dizzy heights, will give us enough facility to aid us through difficulties. In learning to ride a bicycle, we may never win races, but at least we ran get about.

Taking the analogy of the bicycle further; while learning there is the danger that we may fall off. For the first time we may discover how frightened we are of hurting ourselves and how little control we have over our bodies. We usually continue in the face of these difficulties however, because we see that other people have succeeded in spite of them. Some people begin their practice of relaxation (or meditation) believing that there are no difficulties ahead.

Through the popular expositions of meditation some of the public believe that heaven lies just around the corner. This is in a sense true but there are a lot of pitfalls and obstacles in the way. The salesmen often fail to mention these. It is only through thoroughly honest teachers like Bunyan, who mentions the Slough of Despond (despondency and laziness) and Worldly Wiseman (reasoning that really has its base in prejudices, ignorance and fears), that we learn of the difficulties we face.

In learning to experience relaxation in our life, we will undoubtedly come face to face with those parts of our nature that are the things holding us back from relaxation. I ought to explain here that as far as Yoga is concerned, relaxation or the unconditional state, is primal to our whole existence. This has to he taken on trust until one experiences it for oneself. Underlying all our experience, sense impressions, emotions, thoughts and drives, is what the Yoga masters have called Sat-Chit-Ananda: Being-Consciousness-Bliss. That is, an awareness of being in unconditioned bliss. At the very least, we can easily experience that a more relaxed state underlies all our activity and motion of thought and feeling.

In facing those pans of us that hold us from a fuller experience of Satchitananda, we, as it were, experience them very consciously, During our early years we may have felt bitterness that we were not born into better circumstances, with better opportunities for education, fulfilment and affection. This feeling of bitterness about our circumstance may have become so much a part of our nature that we are unaware of it. We can also be quite unconscious of how this underlying attitude colours our life, alters our relationship with others, and shapes our fate. Of course it may not be bitterness, it could be insecurity, fear of failure, sexual difficulties, feelings of inferiority, or one of the host of other things that we take to ourselves like parasites. Or it could be a number of them in any combination. In attempting to go beyond them, or become unconditioned from them, we experience something like gravity, In other words, gravity is almost unnoticeable until we try to resist it. Even jumping is a tremendous effort. While thrusting up and away in a space ship causes great stress and drag, leading even to unconsciousness. To thrust against this force one must take special precautions. Yet if one ran succeed, then one can achieve weightlessness and a new view of the universe. Therefore, we must expect the negative parts of our nature to come up and hit us. We will experience them in all their power instead of hardly being aware of them. The harder we push against them, the stronger they will seem, for in this practice one usually appears to get worse before one gets better. Sometimes such feelings will arise during the practice itself, and the definite link be seen. But more often they will seem like a thing quite separate, and we will doubt the efficacy of the practice itself.

We must press on with the practice of relaxation as best we can, and not succumb entirely to the experience of our hopelessness, bitterness, or whatever it is. Sometimes this may prove quite impossible because of the strength of our feelings. `Then we must try, even if only occasionally to think, “This is a healing process. I am seeing my unconscious moods, my karma, coming to the surface. It is enough to recognise this and press on, until it has all come out of me.” Even this may be difficult due to feeling that what we are experiencing is reality and our deepest self, not just something that will pass. How long this goes on depends upon how much karma (the inbuilt results of all our past emotions, thoughts and actions) we have to work out. Also, on how we handle the situation.

Neither Suppression or Inertia

There is, of course, a temptation to push back into unconsciousness all that we are releasing, or at the other extreme we may be overwhelmed by it. The ideal is neither to suppress, nor be swept away, but to watch with as much equilibrium as we can. Neither should this equilibrium be of the stoic, forced type, but arising from the practice. Remembering the principles of the method itself is its own safeguard.

Do not think that one’s Karma is not faced unless pressed against in this manner. Whatever one does, one faces self. The practice of Yoga, or other similar disciplines, merely speeds up the process, aiming to bring it to a healing climax. In this climax, many possibilities will become apparent, but to reach the goal we must say to ourselves over and over, “This is not It. This is not It,” until at last in truth we can say, `This is It!”

As for the actual methods of relaxation. I will explain one of the simplest and most profound of the methods in this chapter, and in the following chapters, explain some of the other Yoga methods. As all such methods, if only in experience, are progressive, we will start from the beginning. For until we have learnt to recognise the various unnecessary tensions within us, we will be unable to drop them at will.

In practising relaxation, we have to recognise that tension is as necessary to life in the body, as relaxation is. The heart tenses, then completely relaxes, our chest does likewise in healthy breathing. Even our waking and sleeping express this rhythm of action and rest, consciousness and unconsciousness, energy and inertia, Life is a balance of opposites, a marriage of them, or even a contest. Birth and death are the major poles with these smaller opposites of our life in between. Relaxation is she balance and because of this, during our practice we will notice a balancing of our personality also. The dry intellectual will find himself becoming more intuitive, more emotional, more religious and irrational. The irrational, emotional type will find a more intellectual, reasoning nature coming to the fore.

Relaxation and You

Replace Tension with Relaxation

However, let us be frank with each other. I am a man. I have never given birth to a child except in a dream. I am only passing on to you the experience of other women. On the other hand, I have used these principles in my own life and seen what were pains in my emotional life become pleasures. I have not found perfect bliss, only an emerging maturity and pleasure in life. You who are reading this book are undoubtedly as much of an imperfect woman as I am an imperfect man. You too must have fears and tensions that create problems and unhappiness in your life as much as I have in mine – maybe less, maybe more. No doubt such inbuilt parts of one’s personality may not change overnight, and you may recognise that. You therefore say to yourself, ‘What point is there in me practising these methods? How much good will they do me in such a short time?’

Co-operate with Life working in you

Replace tension with relaxation

So increase your intake of milk, yoghurt, or bone meal tablets or kelp or calcium tablets. Calcium is best absorbed if vitamin D is present, either in the tablet or as cod liver oil.)

The Life process which causes you to be

What is Life?

Having come this far we are near the end of our journey. We have seen something of Life and our relationship with it. But what is it?

This is a very important question for a number of reasons. It is obvious from what has already been said that our aim is to not only surrender but to actively co-operate with the process of Life in the search for a spontaneous childbirth. (The term ‘spontaneous childbirth’ is used to denote a pleasurable birth due to all parts of one’s being co-operating.) Therefore we have to know what we are co-operating with. Many people give up their relaxation practice in discouragement because they have never been able to define this very question. This discouragement is undoubtedly due to their expectation of the wrong things. The resulting disappointment is a natural deterrent. Therefore, to avoid the disappointment, let us make sure you are on firm ground, in firm contact, with that which constitutes you. Or at least, let us make sure your expectations are aimed at practical issues.

Basically there are just two ways of realising Life. One is by realising the results of its activity. Thus, when we experience our spontaneous breathing or the forming of a infant body within a woman, or observing our consciousness, we are knowing the results of its working. The other way is by being it. That is, by realising that there is no differentiation between consciousness and that which produces it. This is union between Life and that which arises from it.

The relaxation should be practised every day. It may be best done just before getting into bed, or as you get into bed, as this is the one time of day there is always opportunity to do it, as you can always go to bed a few minutes later. The aim is to get the habit so established t hat you can easily use the ‘handing over’ or relaxation during the baby’s birth. The frequent practice will also help to free you of’ inbuilt tensions and problems before the big event occurs. As I have already said, do not expect perfection of yourself. Even our perfect handing over can still allow that wisdom and power which creates us to help us and lead us harmoniously through the birth. You learn to notice whether you are interfering or co-operating with the activities that arise from Life, which readies you for spontaneous childbirth, wherein your conscious self co-operates with the unknown forces of your being in this wonder of creation.

The method of relaxation

For easy reference we will list the method of relaxation point by point:

Make yourself comfortable on your exercise blanket, or in an easy chair. Make sure you are warm enough.
Tense your whole body as hard as possible. Slowly relax. Pass your attention over your body relaxing each part, particularly the forehead, jaw, neck, abdomen and genitals.
Tense your whole body once more, but this time only half as much as before. Slowly relax and pass the attention over the body as before.
Tense the whole body once more, but so slightly that there is only the feeling of tension. Release it until there is the feeling of relaxation. Again pass the attention over the body.
Bring the attention to the arms. Clench the fists and bring the hands to the shoulders, tensing all the muscles in the arms. As you hold this tension in the arms relax all the other parts of the body, and practice the breathing method of using the breath levels. If you are near the end of term and have a uterine contraction, use this instead of the arms. That is, relax the whole body while the uterus contracts.
Concentrate your attention on your breathing without interfering. After about a minute, hold your breath in until it becomes uncomfortable. Release it and let the breathing become normal. Make sure your body is relaxed, then do the same, holding the breath out. When uncomfortable, allow normal breathing to continue.
As you watch your breathing, realise it is an expression of the Life process that causes you to be.
Realise that your whole being, body, and mind, and forming baby, are entirely results of Life, and your relationship with it.
Realise that you relate to Life either in a co-operative or negative manner.
Decide to co-operate with your own innate being – and surrender thinking, emotions, and passions, by letting go of them. Then visualise the light filling your body, and you handing over to it, meanwhile repeating mentally: ‘Surrender to Life’
This needs to be done daily for at least a couple of months so that it becomes a habit to be relaxed.

	Relaxation is more than just a practice of lying and tensing one’s body and then dropping the tension. I believe this becomes obvious from what has already been said. Relaxation is also living and acting in accordance with one’s own being. But before we leave this subject, I would like to go a little farther into some of the issues raised.
This leopard looks as if it is simply hanging loose

Needs and deprivations

You may consider such points arguable, and I am not denying you the right to disagree. One thing, however, that I believe most of us have to accept is the innate needs of the body, even if we will not admit the innate needs of the soul and spirit. Our experience with holding the breath is an immediate demonstration of the body’s innate need for air. But some of the body’s needs are not as immediately noticeable as this. The same applies of course to our innate emotional, mental and spiritual needs. Our needs in these directions, unless they cry out to us as savagely as our need for air, may easily be ignored. But it is true that some of these subtle needs do cry out. After all, our need for air is barely noticeable during the day and night unless we interfere, or are placed in conditions halting this supply. Then we may experience struggle, pain, even terror, as in drowning. Similarly, these other needs are also barely noticeable until we, or circumstances, place us in positions of deprivation. Then it is that physical, mental or emotional pain, or terror, may assert themselves, as in nervous breakdown’ or depression. For these are the voices of our being telling us of needs, of deprivation. Such a need may be as simple as taking more relaxation, or as complex as unlocking our love, that it may pour into our marriage.

As this book attempts to be a practical one, the question therefore has to be asked: ‘How can we recognise our innate needs of body, soul and spirit before they become symptoms of pain?’

It is obvious that I cannot go into a lengthy discussion of dreams, but possibly enough can be given to help you understand some of the most useful dreams that occur during pregnancy.

Influencing Your Unborn Child

The picture is that of a 21-week-old unborn baby named Samuel Alexander Armas, who is being operated on by surgeon named Joseph Bruner. The baby was diagnosed with spina bifida and would not survive if removed from his mother’s womb. During the procedure, the doctor removes the uterus via C-section and makes a small incision to operate on the baby. As Dr.Bruner completed the surgery on Samuel, the little guy reached his tiny, but fully developed hand through the incision and firmly grasped the surgeon’s finger. Dr.Bruner was reported as saying that when his finger was grasped, it was the most emotional moment of his life, and that for an instant during the procedure he was just frozen, totally immobile.

Chapter two of Yoga and Childbirth

In 1962 most authorities did not believe that the unborn child could be influenced by the activities of the mother. In that year a shocked world witnessed the birth of growing numbers of malformed thalidomide babies. Yet for generations, those who had listened to their intuition had warned the public time and again that a tragedy could occur if they were not more careful in their use of medical drugs and diet. The world is still being warned that drug use during pregnancy is only part of the problem. In a world rushing headlong into the ever greater use of manufactured, synthetic and preserved foods, any number of further catastrophes still promise to mature.

Prior to 1962, it was generally believed that the placenta acted as a barrier to harmful substances ingested by the mother, or circulating in her blood. To damage a baby without killing the mother too was thought impossible. To quote from a recent scientific statement, however, ‘We now know that nothing could be further from the truth. There are a number of substances which can damage a baby profoundly, particularly during the early weeks of pregnancy, probably even before the mother knows she is pregnant.’ The harmful influences are listed as radiation, chemicals, notably drugs, and some infections. There is as yet no detailed knowledge of exactly what changes most drugs, such as aspirin, codeine, and the host of other medical chemicals, cause in the unborn child. But in animal experiments it has been found that almost any drug can damage the foetus.

Dr Guttmacher, in his book, Pregnancy and Birth, gives possible causes of damage as: German measles during early pregnancy; the transfusion of Rh positive blood to Rh negative girls or women; excessive insulin during pregnancy for the diabetic mother; poor standard of physical, nutritive or reproductive health in the parents at conception, and in the mother during pregnancy; X-ray during pregnancy, especially to the pelvic area, general anaesthesia in pregnancy during dental and surgical procedures; air travel in un-pressurised cabins before the twelfth week; children born to aged parents; medical and social drugs (smoking and alcohol, for instance).

Obviously, such statements need some comments in balancing our understanding. Despite the fact that the unborn baby can be hurt by so many factors virtually all of them due to the unnatural things men and women subject their bodies to – the foetus is, nevertheless, fantastically resourceful in meeting difficulties, especially in healthy parents. This naturally applies to elderly parents also.

Quoting once more from a reasonably conservative authority, we find the statement:

Only in recent years have we come to recognise the importance of foetal life. Its quality has a profound effect on everything that happens later to the individual. The growth and health of the foetus is influenced to some extent by its own inherited make-up, but this is profoundly influenced and -modified by its environment, probably from the very moment of conception. . . . The uterus itself must be a suitable bed and container for the baby. . . . It can only do this if the mother herself is in good health, and, ideally, the mother should be free from disease and extremely well nourished throughout her pregnancy. In general, the better the health and nutrition of the mother the better will be the baby’s chances of a healthy nine months in the womb and a robust delivery and survival.

Why drugs can be harmful

Having said this much, let us look in greater detail at the statements already made. For instance, why can drugs and unnatural procedures harm the unborn baby? What is meant by ‘a poor standard of physical, nutritive and reproductive health’? And what is a chemical?

As yet, very little is known as to exactly why drugs and some unnatural procedures cause the results they do. Perhaps we can gain a little insight by understanding what drugs do, and why we use them, or at least why they are used.

There are many types of drugs. Some are derived from plants or trees, such as opium, quinine, and digitalis. Although found in plants they are nearly always simply one part of the plant’s chemical compound, which is extracted and concentrated. Other drugs are chemicals that are produced almost entirely artificially, either through the refining processes as in oil derivatives, or through other chemical procedures. Now drugs have entered yet another area, that of the antibiotic type, which are not inert chemicals but living moulds, as with penicillin. One can state fairly confidently that all drugs are used either to produce changes in the body, or to stop changes taking place. These are the reasons for drug use.

It seems that these are also the reasons why they are dangerous, especially during pregnancy. We need little imagination or understanding of natural processes to see why. Anything, whether plant or human, that is full grown, is difficult to alter in size, build, and basic characteristics. But the further back we go in the process of growth, the greater ability we have to direct and influence the development that will follow. In pregnancy as a whole, and in the first three months in particular, the most fantastic, even miraculous, changes are taking place. Apart from anything else, the sperm and ovum increase their weight millions of times. During these very intricate and delicate changes, any chemical or drug, which after all is specifically designed to either induce change or interfere with it, can influence the development radically.

The medical practice uses drugs because they influence the body’s nervous system, functions, cells, etc., in major ways. As adults, or established children, we can sometimes survive such drugs without too violent side-effects, because our body and its processes have reached a point of stasis that protects it. The foetus has not by any means reached this stability; its whole life is fantastic change and growth.

We have seen that drugs are either synthetic substances, or chemicals taken from plants and concentrated in order to have more profound or ‘concentrated’ results. But the statements made by doctors say that drugs and chemicals may injure the unborn baby. Therefore, what is the difference between a drug and a chemical? Basically, most drugs are chemical substances that are used for medicinal purposes. Whereas a chemical, as the word is used above, is a chemical substance (i.e. a substance artificially produced) used for non-medical purposes. The word therefore covers a variety of chemicals used, for instance, in agriculture as fertilisers and pesticides; in the home as pesticides, food additives, flavourings, sweeteners to food and drink; as fumes, gases, water additives, etc.

Many chemicals are therefore taken into our body in the air we breathe, fluids we drink, foods we eat, and household -appliances we use. At first sight these do not appear as dangerous as the use of drugs during pregnancy. It is certainly true that most of them produce nothing like the changes of, for instance, thalidomide. But at the beginning of this chapter I said -that the intuitive are still warning us of coming catastrophes. It is in this area they feel one of the greatest dangers lies. This is because of several fairly logical reasons. Most of these chemicals are taken quite unconsciously. They are taken in very large amounts. Neither is there a feeling of reserve about them as with the use of drugs.

To take but two of the most commonly used chemicals, we have white sugar, whie rice and white flour. Many people will feel shocked that I have named these as chemicals, yet neither of them occur naturally. Both are produced by complex procedures. Both are concentrated extracts of plants. Both produce marked changes in the body, and so could almost be called drugs. Certainly both are dangerous influences on the unborn, and the born. Why?

Some years ago, a dental expert, Dr Price, became interested in the causes of tooth decay, and also dental malformations that is, misplaced, cramped teeth, and narrow mouth. He began to investigate, and during many years research gradually uncovered far more than he had ever expected, or even looked for. He found that the causes were due to our change of diet, particularly white flour and white sugar. This may seem an interesting little snippet of information, one to be smiled over and forgotten, until we pause one moment in -thought. Remember, I did not just say dental decay; I also said dental and mouth malformation.

Is it not a sobering thought to realise that more and more of our race, through its growing diet of chemicals, are being born with malformations? Joan Grant, during an archaeological dig in the Middle East, collected forty sets of teeth. She says that “there were ‘children’s teeth, middle-aged teeth, teeth of men who were so old that the surface of the molars was ground almost smooth and in none of the forty sets I collected was there a single decayed tooth, nor a jaw abscess, nor a wisdom tooth that had not grown in exact alignment with the rest.”

Please do not think that I feel white flour, white rice, white sugar, and the other chemicals we absorb are simply causing malformations in increasing numbers of unborn babies. No, it is even worse than that. What is happening is that the drugs and chemicals are doing exactly the job they were designed for – namely, producing changes in our body. In particular, on one of the most sensitive parts of our body, the genes in our sperm and ova.

Dr. Noakes is an advocate of a low-carbohydrate, high-fat diet, often referred to in South Africa as the “Noakes” or “Banting” diet. Noakes has characterised mainstream dietary advice as “genocide”. He stated publically that many of his patients were eating themselves to death by eating their ‘normal’ diet of manufactured foods.

In February 2014 a registered dietician complained to the Health Professions Council of South Africa (HPCSA) that Noakes tweeted to a mother that she should wean her baby onto low-carbohydrate, high-fat foods, which he described as real foods. The HPCSA held a hearing about the allegation against Noakes over the next few years. Controversially, on 28 October 2016, the HPSCA incorrectly released a statement announcing that Noakes had been found guilty of misconduct. In a second press release issued over three hours later, the HPSCA apologised for the mistake.^[14] Noakes was cleared of misconduct in April 2017.^[15]^[16] The HPSCA lost its appeal in June 2018.^[17]

In August 2014, Noakes sent a tweet to his 46,000 twitter followers which said: “Dishonest science. Proven link between autism and early immunisation covered up?”.^[18] The tweet included a link to a video from the disgraced ex-doctor and anti-vaccine activist Andrew Wakefield, in which Wakefield was repeating the conspiracy theory that the CDC is covering-up a link between vaccination and autism.^[18] Subsequently challenged on twitter, Noakes responded that he personally had “no opinion” on the matter.^[18]

During the 1930’s, Sir Robert McCarrison, a world-famous nutritionist and scientist, carried out an experiment in diet using rats. He fed groups of rats diets common among a variety of different races. The diseases suffered in each race were startlingly reproduced among the rats. But possibly an even more important experiment, in considering the results of refined and synthetic foods, was that done by Bernasek in Prague. One group of rats was fed on wheat grain, dried lucerne, margarine cod liver oil, dried full milk, casein, calcium carbonate and salt. The other group was fed on a diet where all natural fats had been replaced by margarine, with all known vitamins, minerals and trace elements added synthetically. Thus this diet was the chemical equivalent of the natural one. All of these rats, from an original 120, in four generations had died out entirely. Quoting from an article by Michael Allaby in Here’s Health, he describes the fourth generation as follows:

From the two females remaining, two litters were produced; one litter of two young, the other of five. These seven new-born rats formed the fourth generation. Three of them died straight after birth and the other four died between the sixteenth and twenty-second days, though at first they seemed to develop normally. So, by the fourth generation the experiment came to an end the subjects were all dead.

From the autopsies performed on all the dead rats it was learned that the females which had appeared to be sterile had, in fact, conceived, but had reabsorbed their foetuses. The young who died all suffered from disorders arising from inadequate development of myelin, the fatty substance, containing protein, which forms a sheath to the larger nerve fibres, together with degenerative changes in the nerve cells themselves.

Considering the huge influx of processed and synthetic foodstuffs, this would suggest increasing sterility in humans, and growing abnormalities at birth.

Nutrition and health

This brings us to another of the medical statements, that a poor standard of physical, nutritive or reproductive health may contribute towards malformations. All that we do, all that we are, and how we live, influences our genes, and thus contributes towards the characteristics we pass on to our children. As may be seen later in this book, the genes are not the be-all and end-all of the child’s possibilities. They may be best likened to the building material which the developing baby uses. Present scientific attitude may prefer to think of them as the master plan that controls the whole development. As we have already seen, however, thalidomide can throw even the best genes to the devil. There are also other factors. Nevertheless, it depends very much upon the mothers of this era as to how our race develops in the next few generations.

It has always been recognised by animal breeders that the quality of the offspring is mostly due to the quality of the parents. It is important that the parents be in top form when they mate, as this too has a great influence on offspring. It has for long amazed me that people will go to such lengths and effort to bring their animals to top condition, regulate their diet carefully, see they are exercised, happy and content, to produce beautiful offspring, yet they themselves couldn’t give a damn when producing offspring. They rest inadequately, eat rubbish they would never feed to their animals, mate even in the middle of an illness, and generally act as if they had not a degree of intelligence. The same people walk about saying, Isn’t it terrible the number of babies born with cancer now.’

It is the opinion of many nutritionists that most, if not all, cases of children born dead, sick, malformed, or who die shortly after birth, could be avoided by correct diet and living. In America today, the most civilised’ and therefore the most badly fed country due to enormous food refinement, it is estimated that one in six men cannot father a child, 1 in 200 babies is born deformed, 600,000 have cerebral palsy, and, 1 out of 100 babies is mentally retarded.

The adults are in an even worse state as their impoverished diet leads to further degeneration of health. One in ten is likely to become a patient of a mental hospital. Sixteen million have heart defects. Nearly a million are being treated for cancer. There are eight million arthritics, and three million diabetics. Also multiple sclerosis adds another 250,000; muscular dystrophy 200,000, and TB another 400,000. Obviously, the unnamed sicknesses would take the total into fear-raising numbers. If you believe that this is the fate of mankind, to suffer and die, then it reflects the sickness of mind our society lives in. Investigations carried out by Sir Robert McCarrison, on the Hunzas of the Himalayas, showed a race to shame our ‘civilised’ races. There were no kidney diseases, no cancer no heart conditions, no ulcers, tooth decay, digestive illnesses, arthritis, malformations, or other illnesses. Neither were there any criminals, mental illness, homosexuality, alcoholism, drug addiction, delinquency, or social disturbances. They live to a great old age with all faculties, and death is usually quick and painless; a laying aside of the body. Adelle Davis, in her book Let’s Eat Right to Keep Fit, also mentions the researches of Dr Price as reported in his book Nutrition and Physical Degeneration.

He tells of a people with erect postures, unbelievable endurance, and cheerful even dispositions. These people had excellent bone structure; their faces and jaws were so wide and well developed that their teeth were not crowded together, and stayed free from decay just as their bodies stayed free from disease. The statistics concerning the incidence of cancer, ulcers, high blood pressure, tuberculosis, heart and kidney diseases, muscular dystrophy, multiple sclerosis, and cerebral palsy were zero, zero, zero in every case. Names for these diseases were unknown and unneeded. Dr Price found no physicians, surgeons, psychiatrists, no crime, no prisons, no mental illness and no institutions for the insane, feeble-minded, alcoholics, drug addicts; no child delinquency, no homosexuality. Every mother nursed her babies; a non-functional breast was unheard of. Mental, moral and emotional health accompanied physical health.

Many other studies of so-called ‘primitives’ revealed groups in Africa, South America, and elsewhere, having the same health and well-being. These investigations, in similar studies of such communities who had been influenced by the ‘civilised’ races even though living in the same area, but now eating civilised foods such as white sugar and white flour, found tooth decay, faulty bone structures, crime, sexual immorality, perversions, ulcers, colitis, and so on through the list of civilised sickness.

Medical and social research have also uncovered a mass of information the public knows little or nothing about. A few snippets of such information that refer to pregnancy, childlessness, and malformations are as follows.

Studies have shown that smoking not only results in a smaller baby, but in some cases in infertility. Males have shown dead sperm due to smoking. Tests on rats given nicotine resulted in decreased fertility. A German study revealed its influence on sexual hormones generally, resulting in greater incidence of sterility, frigidity, miscarriage and menstrual disturbance amongst smokers. Animals absorbing the equivalent of twenty cigarettes daily had a ten times higher rate of still-births than usual.

The Lancet and British Medical Journal both draw notice to the fact that cortisone taken during pregnancy can cause cleft palate in the baby. Other factors have also been found to cause the same results. Vitamin A and the B vitamins, especially B6, when withheld in animal diets, caused harelip in progeny. Experimenters could cause this at will simply by withholding these nutrients. Similar results have been noted in humans.

Dr Kugelman states that the increase in mental backwardness or illness in the new-born is often due to insufficient nutrition in pregnancy. The results of a seven-year test were given in the 1955 March issue of Time. 2,400 women took part in the test. They were from working-class families with poor diets. Some were given pills of no nutritional value. The others received nutritional supplements during their pregnancies. It was shown that the children from those women on supplemental nutrition were indeed of higher intelligence generally than those on the placebo.

A fascinating story is told by Dr Anna Szasz of Budapest. She has worked for many years on the treatment of Downs Syndrome children, and has discovered that vitamin E supplement given from birth causes gradual but very definite positive development to take place. One of her patients, a woman of middle age, gave birth to three Downs Syndrome children, each one worse than the last.

She then became pregnant again, but this time Dr Szasz put her on a high protein diet with plenty of vegetables and liver. She was also given full vitamin supplementation with an emphasis on vitamin E. Her baby was born at the right time, perfectly sound and healthy.

Still on the subject of Downs Syndrome, Dr Rapaport researched into the incidence of Downs Syndrome births in areas with fluoridated water supplies. He found that in areas with only up to 0.2 mlg of fluorine per litre of water, 34.15 Down’s syndrome per 100,000 births occurred. But in areas where the fluorine level was 1.0 to 2.6 mlg per litre, 71.59 Down’s syndrome were born per 100,000 births.

As pointed out elsewhere, Dr Carlton Fredericks (Ph.D.) reports that still-births rose 150 per cent in areas that became fluoridated. And animal research has shown fluoride dissolves forming heart tissue in embryos.

Experiments have shown that animals eating only proteins that have been cooked die out by the fourth generation. Considering how little uncooked foods people now eat, this naturally suggests a threat to correct reproduction. The animals developed malfunction increasingly in each generation. The same is happening to thousands of people in our society now. Our very babies, fed on a ‘formula’ instead of at their mothers’ breasts, are literally initiated into the death-dealing process at birth. Because the difficulties do not show immediately is no sign that the changes are not occurring in the baby’s body. If the baby has to have a formula preparation, the threat can be offset by feeding living protein as soon as possible. Pasteurised milk, killed as it is by heat, is not among the living protein class.

During the years 1924-29, 20,061 babies were investigated at the Chicago Infant Welfare Centre. To quote from Alan Moyle’s book About Nature Cure, the facts arising from this investigation showed the enormous difference in death rates between breast-fed and bottle-fed babies.

Infants ———– ——–Deaths –Percentage

Entirely breast-fed 9,794 — 15 —- 0.15

Partially breast-fed 8,605 —59 —- 0.7

Artificially fed 1,707 ——–144 — 8.4

Reaching a high standard of health

Having looked at some of the negative aspects of how the unborn baby can be influenced, we may turn our attention to more constructive features. If we consider what can cause detrimental results, we can begin to see clearly what will cause beneficial results. To summarise, we said that virtually all artificial and unnatural influences can cause injury to the development. This is because, being unnatural, the mother’s and the baby’s body have to attempt an adjustment to it, or normal functions are interfered with. This applies to all drugs and those chemicals which induce harmful changes, including such as ‘the pill’, and those taken as food. The prospective parents, and the pregnant mother especially, should attempt to reach a high standard of -health, on a whole-food, and as far as possible raw-food, diet.

This will be explained in greater detail in the chapter on diet. All influences that interfere with natural processes should be avoided. Great attention should be given to the body’s needs, such as sufficient exercise, rest, social relaxation, breathing, toilet, self-expression and reception of love and affection, and so on. Undoubtedly, with many of us, it will be the loving and disciplined work of several generations attempting to live in the right way, before the bodies produced are the completely beautiful and radiantly healthy temples of the soul they should be.

There is then the other side to influencing the unborn child that is at present still smiled upon as superstition by most doctors and scientists. This is the influence upon how it will look, and specifically upon the nature of its personality. Obviously, nearly all that is written about this subject has been by those I have called the intuitive section of society. Just as these were the first to point out the physical dangers of pre-natal influence, they are also the first to point out the possibilities of psychological influence. So far, it is only the physical influence that science can see for itself. Also, much rubbish has been said and written in the name of the intuitives concerning this subject. Nevertheless, there does seem to be some very serious evidence and statements worthy of consideration. To understand these statements, we have to understand how the intuitive mind works. It does not reach its conclusions by reasoning from revealed ‘facts’. It appears, in its highest form, to directly experience things, or perceive directly without the use of intellect. The difficulty then lies in attempting to express what has been experienced. It is as difficult as a scientist attempting to explain to a layman the complex relationships of biochemical activity. Fortunately, many of these intuitive realisations are to a small extent now observed scientifically.

For instance, one of the intuitive statements is that the unborn baby has, from the start, an aware relationship with the mother. This is where we begin to have difficulty in explaining intuitive terms, simply because such issues are not common knowledge. But by ‘awareness’ is not meant thought. Nevertheless, the baby is not a dead thing. All living things have awareness in some degree, and the unborn baby is certainly not a piece of rock, but has a high level of awareness. Just as a bad relationship with the mother can cause psychological difficulties in the child, and later the adult, simply because the adult develops from the child, so can problems experienced by the unborn baby cause difficulties in the child. I have noticed in one of my own sons that from the earliest part of his life, in fact from birth, he has been far more cautious and in need of security than my other children. From the time he could speak he would never allow a fire to be left on in his room; he did not walk until three due to fear of falling. Babies are often born with psychological problems. In the case of my son, this is possibly due to the difficulty of his breech birth, and its shock and strain. In others, there is evidence to show that it has preceded birth.

Meanwhile, taking it as an unproved possibility, what can we do about it? The whole force about much that has been said in regard to pre-natal influence is its inference that one can put it on’ like a regime for slimming. This influence, from the scanty information at hand so far, is not a thing we can switch on or off. It lies in the whole realm of how the woman reacts to the fact there is another being developing within her. It lies in whether she feels resentment, fear, fulfilment, love, guilt, desire to abort, and the infinity of other human feelings. Is the baby wanted? Why is it wanted, or not wanted? Is the relationship with the coming baby a mature, problem-facing one? Some have a baby as one might have a doll, others in an attempt to cement a marriage, or through family or social pressure. All these attitudes constitute a form of relationship with the unborn, and of course the born, baby, and have tremendous influence upon it. Any pressing psychological problems we may have, such as frigidity, feelings of uncleanness in regard to sex, great insecurity, deep depressions, and so on, also constitute a relationship that influences the baby, even prior to birth. Ideally, one should attempt to resolve such problems prior to pregnancy.

As nobody is perfect however, we cannot, and indeed it is unrealistic and itself a problem to aim at human perfection. What we can aim at is the admittance of our weaknesses and problems, and the attempt to recognise them as difficult areas that should not control the important decisions in our life. What -we can do is to see our life as a field of amazing possibilities that can be worked on, gradually moulded and released. What we can do is to attempt self-understanding, and through it growth to greater maturity and self-expression.

Let us face facts. What influences the baby most, whether born or unborn, is the whole structure of the mother and father’s personality, and all the actions and interactions that arise from this. It is unrealistic to think we can suddenly change this pattern of our moods, fears, preferences, hates and morals, just because a baby is planned or on its way. But it is not unrealistic either before or during pregnancy, to look upon oneself as a problem that can be gradually worked on and understood. We therefore have to admit that one of the greatest factors in influencing our children is what we have already done with our life. How much ability, patience, understanding, perseverance, gentleness, lovingness, co-operation, and insight we have cultivated. History proves it as at least a general fact that an Abraham Lincoln is not born from the womb of a hateful vengeful woman. It is also now recognised that any long discipline of mind, emotion or body can alter our genetic makeup. In his book Raja Yoga, Yesudian, talking on this subject, gives the example of Nijinsky, the great ballet dancer. For several generations his family had been dancers; now, the very bone structure of his foot had altered from the normal, enabling him to leap quite extraordinarily.

Special efforts during pregnancy, whether of diet, exercise, or mind, do seem to count for a lot, however. Obviously one does not have to be a great musician to give birth to a musical prodigy, or a great runner to give birth to an athlete. It helps if it is ‘in the family’, but it is by no means necessary. Again, it is the relationships between parents and child that count for most; the depth, discipline, sincerity, encouragement, example of love, that help or hinder the expression of what the child is. We do not create the child, but as parents we do hand over much in the way of physique and health, attitudes, emotions, understanding, that are the building materials, the foundation of the child’s future life as an independent being. The special discipline during pregnancy can play a very real part in this. One could, of course, quote cases like that of Amy Johnson’s mother who, during pregnancy, thought of little else except aeroplanes and flying. But such cases are unusual. What can be done is to attempt to live in as great a harmony with ourselves as possible. That is, attempt to supply what our body needs in the way of nutrition, exercise and rest. Also we can indulge in our special interests, or those things that bring great pleasure and happiness. Read again the books that have moved you, or opened depths of realisation and feeling. Listen to the music you love. Rest often. Indulge your desire to talk or cuddle or swim, or whatever it is that brings lasting fulfilment and a sense of well-being. Avoid stress as much as possible. But not in the negative sense of avoiding challenges, problems, or running away from difficulties which, if only you faced up to them, would begin to be resolved. In other words, as much as possible be yourself, your real self, the self you have always longed to be deep down, but which fears and pressures have prevented you from realising. This is all your baby requires of you. Undoubtedly though, the offering of self to Life, or God, as a channel for the expression of Life’s hidden splendour, has more influence in creating a beautiful baby than any other single factor.

If you are a praying person, pray with all your feelings for a baby that will bring great Light to the world.

Gayelord Hauser tells us, in his book The New Diet Does It, of an interesting approach to this question. He says:

Once when I was in Paris, I stood in a museum admiring ‘The Thinker’ by Rodin. Beside me was a young American woman, an acquaintance, attractive enough by ordinary standards. On close scrutiny, however, her face showed lines of dissatisfaction and unhappiness. She had told me her story; how the children had been ill all winter; there had been a siege of pneumonia besides continuous colds; and a small son had been operated on for mastoid. The winter had left her so fatigued from worry and sleepless nights and hard physical work that her husband had insisted on the holiday in Paris and had arranged for his mother to stay with the children. Extract from The New Diet Does

Such stories are common enough, but invariably sad to anyone who holds the conviction that these illnesses are needless and can be prevented.

‘How I wish I might be an artist,’ she exclaimed wistfully. ‘It must be wonderful to be able to create such beauty for others to see. I spend my life cooking, shopping and nursing the children. I’m nothing, really, just a Hausfrau. It makes one seem so useless.’

She had touched on one of my deepest convictions: that every mother can be an artist, a sculptor, that she has it in her power to create and help develop live, vital beings.

‘Don’t you see that you can create beauty in building beautiful children?’ I asked her. ‘Rodin first worked in clay, then in bronze; you work with living flesh. Just as he moulded his works of art, so you are moulding the bodies and spirits of your children. Just as he spent hours in shaping and reshaping clay, you spend hours in shopping and cooking. When the cooking is done with care, and foods which build health are purchased, when those foods are prepared to save their vital elements to build beauty, then the kitchen has dignity as great as the studio of any famous artist.’’ See Vitamins – Little Wonders

Gradually I could see her wistfulness and dissatisfaction disappear; her attitude toward housework and child care changed.

Years later when I met her at a lecture I was giving in Philadelphia she showed me three wonderful, glowing children. She had created three works of art which were beautiful not only in body, but in mind and spirit.

Link to chapter three

Fertility and the Mind Body Connection

Column Editor’s Note: Teresa Robertson offers preconception sessions to assist clients to connect with an unborn child, to promote fertility, to heal pregnancy losses such as miscarriage and abortion, and to assist adoptive parents to connect with their unborn children. For more information about long distance sessions, lectures, or workshops please call (303)258-3904.Teresa’s contact information is: In Health Teresa Robertson RN,CNM, MS Intuitive Counselor 3011 N. Broadway, Suite 23 Boulder, CO, 80304, USA. Email: tann@indra.com

One Couple’s Story

Emily and Nicholas, a vibrantly healthy couple in their late thirties, were unable to conceive despite all medical tests affirming their ability to do so. After two years of working with traditional infertility specialists, several insemination efforts, and three months of fertility drugs, Emily was still not pregnant. A friend gifted her with a preconception session.

During this session, Emily used a simple guided visualization exercise in which she explored and conversed with her ovaries, tubes and uterus. While communicating in this open-hearted manner with her body, Emily discovered and healed the block that had prevented her from having this little boy being who was hovering just above her shoulder. Below, Emily shares her experience.

“When I looked into my right tube I suddenly felt something dark stuffed there. Teresa asked me if I had ever experienced any sexual or reproductive trauma. I then shared with her that I had an abortion when I was nineteen. When I dialogued with this tube further I realized that this is where I had stored the trauma surrounding that abortion. My abortion experience had involved a great deal of heartache and pressure from my boyfriend at the time, who begged me to have the baby and marry him. I loved him deeply, but I was consumed with guilt resulting from a very religious upbringing that clearly defined premarital sex as both sinful and shameful. This, combined with the intense fear of my family’s reaction and taking on the responsibility of marriage and a family, played heavily as I made the heart-breaking decision to abort – an act that also was prohibited by my church.

“Teresa helped me to make this connection that my body simply made a decision to protect me from any future trauma of this nature by never getting pregnant again! Once I identified this phenomenon, I was able to empty this darkness out of my tube by simply connecting the tube to the center of the earth and asking for it to release. I also employed a wonderful visualization using colors that are healing for me, to wash my uterus and to reline it with warmth and welcoming energy for this little being. Once this area was clear and clean I was able to easily connect with the little boy spirit who wanted to come to me and Nicholas. Upon going home, Nicholas and I constructed a ‘Baby Altar,’ in order to welcome this baby boy spirit to come into our lives.”

A few days later, Emily conceived after making love with her husband, and nine months later joyfully gave birth to her son Adam.

Emily’s story dramatically illustrates how connecting and communicating with your body and your unborn child can increase your fertility and your ability to conceive. Over the past four years, during preconception sessions with women and their partners, I have frequently witnessed miracles like Emily’s. The extent of fertility intervention these women have employed has included herbs, acupuncture, intrauterine insemination, IVF and donor egg IVF. Time and time again I have witnessed that when a woman authentically connects to her body, and begins to listen and honor her body’s inner truth and wisdom, she cultivates a feedback relationship with her body and her unborn child. As a result, a dramatic shift occurs in her belief in and ability to conceive.

The success of using meditation, visualization and journaling techniques to heal and cultivate fertility has been strongly documented by Alice Domar in Healing Mind, Healthy Woman and by Niravi Payne in The Language of Fertility. Fifty percent of women who have participated in Domar’s groups, in which meditation, relaxation, and journaling techniques are employed, were able to conceive and give birth. In contrast, only 20% of women who solely used traditional “infertility treatments” were able to conceive. Niravi Payne’s work focuses on illuminating and healing family secrets and beliefs surrounding fertility. Her program also reports increased pregnancy and birth rates for her clients.

We live in a time in which a commonly held belief is that our fertility is diminished and that we need outside help to conceive. This belief has become very evident for women in the “baby boomer generation” who have embraced and mastered the male aspect qualities of doing and making it happen – yet conceiving eludes them. Creating a baby is a receptive act that requires embracing and using our female aspect. For many women, there exists an inner conflict and imbalance between their inner female and male aspects. As many women have learned to accomplish success by relying strongly on utilizing their male aspect, many have forsaken, forgotten and invalidated their female side. This female side includes qualities and abilities such as to be vulnerable, open and to receive.

The all too common picture I witness, is the career woman who is creating, doing, and nurturing everyone else and has no time to receive or give to herself because to do so would be perceived as a weakness. Instead of interpreting their bodies’ not conceiving as a message or cry for help, often these women further invalidate their bodies as being “non-productive” and “an infertile failure,” and often force their bodies to create from an empty well. As Christianne Northrup, MD writes: “Many infertile women are working 60-80 hours a week and are exhausted; then they pursue having a child as though they were writing a PhD dissertation. Conceiving a child is a receptive act, not a marathon event that can be programmed into your Day Timer.”

How often does a woman who is on the fertility merry-go-round hear someone tell her to just go home and relax? Yet rarely does someone actually sit with this woman and demonstrate to her how to do this. I have heard countless stories of women who gave up trying to get pregnant, who then got pregnant after going away with their husband to just have fun. In the past year, I have witnessed two women conceiving on their own, after “failing” IVF cycles! Both these women had stopped focusing on their in-ability to get pregnant and had rediscovered their creativity when they conceived.

Sure, it is easy advice to say just let go of being in control or stop trying so hard. However, anyone who has wanted anything desperately knows that can be a near impossible feat. That is where meditation, relaxation, journaling and visualization techniques can be of vital assistance.

Meditating and relaxation exercise can serve as empowering processes which can assist you to reconnect to your core self as the creator of your baby. More importantly, they teach how to relinquish control. As mentioned before, conceiving a baby is a receptive creative act, so often the work and exercises I explore with my clients include exercises which connect a woman to her female creative power (as described in Emily’s story) and cultivate skills to relinquish control.

Physiologically, meditation and/or relaxation exercises are known to decrease blood pressure, to lower heart rate, and to decrease the production of stress hormones. A study in Italy found that “an increased vulnerability to stress is associated with a poor outcome in in-vitro fertilization – embryo transfer treatment.” Dr. Lorraine Bonner explains the connection between stress and decreased fertility. “The mind-body knows that in situations of extreme tension our sex organs are our most expendable parts. The mind-body knows that when times are tough, that is not the time to make a baby.”

Meditation also stimulates the pineal gland. This gland produces several hormones, two of which are serotonin (necessary for libido and well-being) and melatonin (another hormone connected with feelings of relaxation and well-being), which in turn stimulate the pituitary gland. The pituitary is the gland which predominantly regulates female reproductive hormones such as FSH (follicle stimulating hormone which matures the eggs in the ovaries), estrogen, progesterone, and oxytocin in labor.

It is possible for meditation/visualization techniques to work with your body to enhance and/or change the level of certain hormones. For two years my dentist extensively tracked the relationship between food, supplements, and saliva pH in order to learn which foods optimally affect the pH of the saliva. One day he realized that his patients could simply convert their saliva pH by thinking about eating, or thinking about the desired pH level!

Consulting with the Child

Susan and David integrated communicating and meditating with their unborn child, to infuse their individual sacred and loving essence as a couple into the procedure of an intrauterine insemination. During a session one week before their anticipated insemination, they connected with their unborn child and dialogued with her about her specific needs and desires for this insemination. They learned that she wanted candles, soft music, and communication with her before and during the insemination. Susan says, “I remember her asking for chocolate truffles because I was avoiding sugar and chocolate at the time.”

During the break before the insemination, Susan and David went to a nearby park, cuddled and shared a luscious picnic lunch and connected with Amanda. David shares, “A year before Amanda was born I wrote lyrics to a song which I feel was channeled by our baby. During our picnic lunch and the insemination we read her lyrics. We continue to celebrate Amanda’s conception day as a day to honor and to reaffirm Amanda as a spiritual being; this always includes reading her lyrics.”

I urge you to not approach meditation/relaxation as another regime, project or task to get you pregnant. I would, however, invite you to covet this quiet time as a time to rejuvenate, refresh and to give to yourself regardless of what the outcome will be. Create for yourself opportunities to go inside to release the pressures and stresses of trying to get pregnant. Use this time to nourish yourself by authentically communicating with your body and to develop a relationship of working in cooperation with your body, instead of commanding and directing your body to perform and to produce. Love your body for where she is right now instead of invalidating yourself for failing to conceive. As you embrace this quiet space, don’t be surprised to find yourself feeling more empowered, alive and fertile.

References:

Christianne Northrup (1998), Women’s Bodies, Women’s Wisdom, (2nd edition). New York: Bantam, page 418.

Christianne Northrup, Health Wisdom for Women Newsletter, July 1997, page 6.

Niravi Payne (1997), The Language of Fertility. New York: Harmony Books, page 37.

Alice Domar (1997), Healthy Body, Health Mind. New York: Doubleday and Company

Julia Indichova (1998), Inconceivable: Winning the Fertility Game. Adell Press

Tony Crisp

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