A friend whose wife, 40 years of age, fell pregnant, was told that she was a high risk case for having a Down syndrome baby. She was advised that as a result of being a high risk case, that she HAD to have an amniosynthesis done to determine whether the baby is in fact Downs or normal. The doctor she saw insisted on it. He didn’t present it as a choice. The woman said that she wasn’t going to have an amniosynthesis done as she just knew intuitively that the baby was fine. Then a social worker friend of hers also insisted on her having the procedure done. She gave in and went for the amniosynthesis.
She chose a very respected gynecologist to do the procedure. Just as he inserted the needle she said something was wrong, the baby was agitated. He immediately stopped and did a sonar. Apparently the baby was literally spinning around its umbilical cord, and the heartbeat was almost undetectable. The doctor told the mother to go outside, while he saw another patient. After about 15 minutes she went back in. The doctor did another sonar and found that the baby’s heartbeat was stronger. She went home… and the baby died.
As her body did not abort, she had a caesarean to remove the remains. The saddest part – it was a perfectly normal little baby boy. His name was Amor. A life wasted for nothing!
Johan is filled with fury at the callousness of the medical profession. The mother was never informed that an amniosynthesis is a life-threatening procedure. She was basically bullied into it by her doctor, her best friend and her husband. Her support system failed her miserably.
What gets to me the most, is the level of disempowerment of the mother. If she was empowered enough within herself, and confident of her being, she would have had the ability to go with her intuition regardless of what everybody else said or tried to force her into.
This experience seen in the light of my experience with 3 pregnancies and births, and the inner journey that accompanied it, makes the empowerment of mothers absolutely vital. Mothers need to be empowered enough to question the medical profession, to gain unbiased information independently and apply it to their unique situations in the light of the guidance they receive from their inner wisdom. How else will vulnerable babies be protected from invasive and mostly unnecessary and definitely harmful medical procedures?
What goes through my mind are thoughts like… if she just had that little bit of information that an amnio is life-threatening, if she had the support of just one person that affirmed her inner wisdom… things might have turned out so very differently. The mother lost a child as a result of one choice she made. That will be with her forever. The father, who is an incredibly gentle and sensitive man, is broken. His self-condemnation knows no bounds. A.E.