Loneliness is most keenly felt when we miss being with or have lost contact with a partner or friend. It is probably normal when young and seeking a life partner, as it is the push we need to overcome barriers.
But unfortunately many of us never grow to our full potential, held back by many circumstances that are possible to overcome if we apply ourselves. To become a whole human being we need to become independent in many ways – which means we are not haunted by depending on another person. Obviously there is a lot more to it, but please read Life’s Little Secrets; Individuation; Habits
Many of us also fail to realise the changes we face as we age. So often we are still living in a baby or childhood level. These are so full of dependencies and often we blame such awful feelings on other or even ourselves. See Ages of Love; Every 7 Years You Change
Our Core or whole Self, that is free from many dependencies, often appears as a deer, or woodland creature in dreams. Below is a quote from Carl Jung’s book Man and His Symbols.
Example: “I am your child and your mother. They call me the ‘connecting animal’ because I connect people, animals, and even stones with one another if I enter them. I am your fate or the ‘objective I.’ When I appear, I redeem you from the meaningless hazards of life. The fire burning inside me burns in the whole of nature. If a man loses it, he becomes egocentric, lonely, disoriented, and weak.”
Example: I felt lonely, terribly lonely, for it, longing for the nearness of someone I loved. My face was against my left bicep. It was the only human comfort I could find – myself. I rolled my head back and forth across the softness of my bicep. Then, as my aloneness became more intense, I suckled my bicep like a breast, longing for the warmth only I could give myself at that moment.
The person felt this as they were remembering a childhood feeling of being hurt emotionally.
Example: I had, or was, a deformed baby, having four eyes, and a somewhat distorted face. The eyes were operated on, two being removed. But the baby grew up a dwarf, very lonely, and shy.
The dreamer commented on his dream saying, “I spoke mentally to the four-eyed dwarf. I asked, “Why were you born deformed?” He replied, “I am the part of you born deformed, not fully developed, you’re sin from the past.”
“Why did you have four eyes?” “Because I looked four two many things. Through trying to look in too many directions there was confusion.”
“What does it mean that you stood outside my door?” “It means that we were so close, and yet had never met.”
“When you met the larger dwarf, what is that?” “Now we have met. You are but a larger, not complete, dwarf. Together we make wonderful person. The large dwarf is two-thirds grown, I am only one-third. Together we are complete.”
The dreamer was in fact a very shy, lonely and retiring person, but the dream was one footstep on his path to become whole.
Example: The following dream has a very deep meaning and a clear guidance-message: The dreamer is in a dark, swampy forest. It is night. He has lost his way and is desperate, not knowing where to go, wallowing in the morass . . . He is not religious, but he falls on his knees and begins to pray, imploring the Higher Forces to help him out of this predicament and to show him the way!. . Suddenly a clear ray of light appears from the black sky, moving and showing a stable way among the boggyness. He rushes forward! But after several steps on the right path — he loses it and feels very frightened and lonely. He falls on his knees again, praying and begging for guidance and help. . . The golden ray reappears from above, leading him out of the dark and swampy dangerous forest. . Three or four times he goes astray, losing the right way. The helpful golden beam always reappears after he offers a sincere and deep prayer to be shown the right direction, where to go, the way out of the darkness and bog. . . His prayer was right: he asked no favors, no gifts, only the right way.
Useful Questions and Hints:
Are you still dependent on others to make you feel happy?
What do you need in you life?
Can you accept yourself – if not what is it you find difficult?
What makes you feel whole and happy?