Example 10 Recurring Dreams

If we keep a record of our dreams it will soon become obvious that some of our dream themes, characters or places recur again and again. These recurrences are of various types. A certain theme may have begun in childhood and continued throughout our life – either without change, or as a gradually changing series of dreams. It might be that the feature that recurs is a setting, perhaps a house we visit again and again, but the details differ. Sometimes a series of such dreams begin after or during a particular event or phase of our life, such as puberty or marriage.

Many people report recurring dreams, but these are of two types. One is the dream that recurs much the same in every feature. The other – serial dreams – are those that slowly change and evolve. Serial dreams might be about something like learning to fly in a long series of dreams; or exploring territory or a house that you only slowly penetrate. Sometimes they are about a relationship in which developmental changes occur.

Such dreams usually reflect changing attitudes and skills in yourself. For instance a man who was confronting his own fears concerning sex, experienced a series of dreams in which he at first had difficulty getting close to and loving a woman. The dreams evolved into ones in which he satisfying made love.

A woman in her fifties told me that since early childhood until her forties she had experienced a recurring dream that was very disturbing. In the dream she was walking past railings in the town she lived in as a child. She always woke in dread and perspiration from this dream. During her forties she had the dream while her sister was visiting and told her the dream. The response was, “Oh, that’s simple. Don’t you remember that when you were about four we were walking past those railings and we were set on by a bunch of boys. Then I said to them, ‘Don’t hurt us our mother’s dead!’ They left us alone, but you should have seen the look on your face.”

From that time on the dream never recurred. It seems likely the event had confronted her with the possibility of her mother dying, which at that age she may never have met before.The impact was strong enough to permeate her life for nearly forty years, causing awful nightmares.

The point is that if we do not integrate such feelings they remain there to be dealt with. And the reason we do not meet them is that we are frightened of our own emotions.  Usually these events were to much to meet or cope with at the time, and becomes encysted in our inner life. But as an adult we can deal them, otherwise the dream would not keep repeating.