The next example illustrates the dreamer feeling anxious as she leaves the everyday world of the ground floor. Maureen sees life as full of pitfalls, though she recognises that others deal easily with what she faces.
Example: ‘I climb a few flights of stairs. As I go up the stairs start wobbling and breaking up. At the top the last flight breaks away from the landing and I am left to cross a gaping hole with a few bits of debris to cling to. It is very frightening, but I see other people passing me on the caved in stairs and onto the landing as if nothing has happened.’
Example: I worked on derelict building dream 27. 9. 95. I realised on Sunday that I could not pull tower block down and that I was left frustrated until it came down I could not build anything new.
Realised that I was this damaged block, yet while I stood there I was keeping my head up like I have always done. I stand always being seen but never knowing what way I will fall (or go). People are never sure about me. I felt that this feeling was from an early age. I was 19 when I got married there had been a cut off point, I felt that it had something to do with being pushed around by Maria – my wife. She was not my partner, I was in fact her convenience. I took this abuse with my “I’m above it all stand”. When the building crashed I cried and cried it was the death of my adulthood, for want of a better word. I was now confronted with old age and the way I had lived trying to stay above it in all ways. I hated my Mother and Father and how; instead I always kill myself as I couldn’t kill them. How I deprived myself of my needs—the picture of Jesus suffer the little children unto me (at Sunday school ) in Hampden rd. where I lived before I went into the orphanage. Even he never came to get me out. There has been no ability to believe in anyone since that time. I also saw that if my partner was happy then so was I. Yet this growing up has come about because of all the misery I have seen in my relationships. I then felt a deep fear that I must turn to God as I am now in old age, to know the Divine Principle as much as possible before I die. The thought of the pain that I would have to go through to achieve this. The building is down now and there is a strong feeling that I should turn inwards and focus on rebuilding my inner character. With a sense of self worth and not just an acceptance of my lot as given by parents and society. I was also happy that I had got Max – my lover – out of the building. I felt it showed a gentle love was still within me, leaving me with a wider feeling of gentleness that has encompassed me since. Kevin.
Here is a dream experienced after Kevin’s death from lung cancer.
Example: Suddenly it was as if Kevin was with me, talking with me. He seemed in one of his pissed off moods. Not badly, but certainly frustrated. He said that no matter how he tried, he couldn’t get home. Being half asleep I started to feel sorry for him. Then I suddenly realised that this was Kevin dead, and not being able to get home was his life-long problem – at least the feeling of it – because he had been put in an orphanage when a child. So I excitedly told him that his life problem was now his death problem. That because he felt he couldn’t get home, he created this environment for himself now. I tried to help him create a different feeling stance, one from which he could ‘get home’. He began to get the idea, and the scenery gradually changed. He created a walled courtyard, sunny with vines and plants, with an adjoining house. The house had a room with a huge window overlooking a view of the sea.