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Dreams – The Magic Mirror of Yourself

Every one of us dream.

Whether we remember or not, each time we sleep we create on apparently real world out of our remembered impressions, habits and emotions. As the stage managers of our inner theatres, we have the most abundant props, costumes and backdrops imaginable. Yet, because a dream is our own creation, no part of it, no emotion contained in it, no flight of fancy portrayed, is other than oneself. Even when we dream vividly of another person, such as the man in our life, the dream personality is made up of our own impressions, hopes and feelings. Most people are often totally unaware of the experience they take in and how it interacts with them when we live with someone. In other words the memories and experience we gather unconsciously change us and are not lost. It is part of you and is symbolised in dreams as a person or event. You have taken in millions of bit of memory, lessons learnt, life experiences along with all the feelings or problems met by loving and living with someone and they are what makes you the person you are. Your dreams tend to put all that in the image of the past person when you are dealing with the influences left in you from the relationship. Please read this wonderful example, it will show how much we take in from those we love or lived with.

Because of this, people blind from birth dream only of touch, sound, smell and taste, but not of sight. Also because of this, dreams are a magic mirror of ourselves. They reflect not only what is happening on the surface of our lives, but also the process of our deep-down growth and change, and the shrewd insights we have into other people, work and our own behaviour. From your dreams you may be able to gain a clearer view of who you are, what is useful to change in yourself, and what creativity you can bring to love and work. Are you the heroine and dominant character in your dreams, or are you usually in a passive, watching role?

For the sake of research, a group of young women in a creative writing class was divided into two groups – those who were spontaneously creative in their written work and those who were not. They were then asked to record their dreams over a period of time. The non-creative girls had a large percentage of dreams in which they were sexually passive, accepted secondary roles and felt vulnerable. The creative girls had a high percentage of dreams in which they were actively satisfying themselves, creating non-conventional settings and experiencing open sexual encounters. The results show that habitual attitudes and responses to everyday life are reflected in what we dream. See Habits; Avoid Being Victims

Fortunately, if your dreams show you to be a passive person who does not find satisfaction, there are things you can do to start a process of change. The following dream illustrates this:

 Example: “I have had this dream regularly over a long period. In it I am driving to meet someone on a hill in the countryside. He is always there first, and is standing with his back towards me. I drive up and park behind his car – a green Rover – and as I am walking towards him he half turns; at that point I wake up. The feeling is of a meeting of souls.”

The dream was sent to us by a Mrs J.C., who appears to go regularly to meet her dream lover, but never allows herself the satisfaction of the culminating togetherness. This is not an entirely passive dream. She is actively moving toward her lover. Nevertheless, its repetition shows it as habitual and probably unsatisfying. To change that, it must be realised that our dreams are a perfectly safe area in which to experiment, explore, express ourselves and find pleasure. In the real world a lover may bring problems as varied as VD or a broken heart. In dreams there are no such dangers. We ore only dealing, remember, with our own feelings, so what is the point of habitually frustrating oneself? What Mrs J.C. can do to change that is to make up her mind to allow the range and scale of her own inner love and pleasure in her dreams. She can also imagine herself in the dream situation while awake, and continue the day dream to satisfaction. The feelings she allows herself in this way, and the new habit of gaining satisfaction, will then gradually enrich her everyday life. See Secrets of Power Dreaming

Lots of people who send their dreams to us do so because of anxiety aroused by a nightmare. Not only do nightmares disturb us at the time, but occasionally they haunt the dreamer for long periods afterwards. We have even received a few reports of nightmares, the same in all details, which recur once or twice a week over a period of years. In such cases a habitual anxiety is at work which might need the professional help of a therapist. But in general, nightmares are a sign that one is healthy and secure enough to release tension while asleep.

Carolyn Winget and Frederic Kapp asked 70 women who were expecting their first baby, to keep a record of their dreams. At delivery, a note was taken of how long each mother was in labour. Comparing the dreams with the length of labour, it was discovered that the women whose delivery took less than overage time had experienced anxiety, sometimes about labour, in 80% of their dreams. The women who took longer than average only experienced anxiety in 25% of their dreams. The conclusion reached was that anxious dreams are safe ways of facing worries about on event – in this case childbirth – which concerns us. By facing the stress during their dreams, the mothers-to-be had better prepared themselves to cope successfully with the tensions of the actual event.

Apart from dreams being a safe way expressing ourselves, finding satisfaction and releasing tension, they are also our creative workshops. During our dreams we explore how we can effectively face the most important decisions that we have to make. See  Life’s Little Secrets

Such as this dream from a young nurse:

 Example: I’m involved with a married doctor. He is a keen sportsman, has two daughters, dearly wants a son, but his wife wants no more children. I dreamt I was in the labour ward and was helping him deliver his wife’s third child. I was in agony, feeling I should be giving him a child, but kept on smiling encouragement. It was a boy. I felt my heart breaking. Suddenly our local tough guy was with me. He led me away saying he knew how much it hurt; we lay on a bed together. He said, ‘You can’t do everything. You love him, he loves you, but his wife must give him a son.’ I felt an enormous peace descend on me after that.”

The meaning is partly obvious. She deeply wants her man’s child, but the dream also shows the conflict in her mind between allowing herself to love and sharing the life and love of this man despite the pain it brings. The tough guy is something very beautiful – her wisdom and gentleness – that has emerged from the hard knocks and experience of real life. It is her ability to give of herself without grasping or manipulating. It is those qualities, down-to-earth honesty and love, which enable her to find peace.

Perhaps she will leave her doctor, and find a man more completely her own. Even if she does, her dream has told her the value of what she has learnt from her experience. See Martial Art of the Mind; Man in your Dream - Techniques for Exploring your Dreams - Habits - Edgar Cayce

What do you see in the mirror of your dreams?

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