Adultery
But adultery depicts the union with, or giving of innermost feelings to, persons or objects for which you have no committed relationship, or do not have a deep affinity with. Or it may be an urge caused by physical or emotional hungers, or needs deeper than the social and religious codes pressing upon you. It is also a way of opening a door to new influences, a new direction in life that will in some way change you, flow back to you with its own needs, light and shadows.
Exactly what your dream reveals depends on your feelings in the dream and the events shown.
Seeing your partner having sex with someone else: You are probably deeply uncertain about your own value and doubt whether you are lovable. These feelings may hide painful dependence upon the loved person. This dependence may be based upon childhood needs that were never met, or were betrayed. This can of course be an intuition, but be careful in deciding which.
If the relationship is felt as pleasant it can be a simple desire for sexual change, satisfaction and adventure that is not satisfied in waking life. If it is resisted, it is nevertheless your own fantasy, so may be desire masked by guilt.
Dream adultery can also be a means of personal attack within a relationship. This because you are having sex with someone else so hitting or hurting your partner.
If the adultery is felt as a threat, it may express anxieties about your relationship.
A woman being someone’s mistress: Can be any of the above, but occasionally anxiety about security. This because becoming a mistress might bring financial or emotional support.
Seeing your partner having sex with someone else: You might be deeply uncertain about your own value and doubt whether you are lovable. These feelings may hide painful dependence upon the loved person. This dependence may be based upon childhood needs that were never met, or were betrayed. It can reflect anxiety or intuition about your partners fidelity. It can also mask a desire to be rid of your partner, to leave them. The adultery would give you an excuse to leave them.
Dreamer commits adultery: We all have sexual desires that sometimes attach to people other than our partner – or to people it would be difficult in reality to have a sexual relationship with. If you are having sex with another person, the dream may therefore be a release of sexual feelings. If so it is a harmless way of exploring sex with another person, or an expressions of wish fulfilment, desire for sexual variety, or guilt about wayward desires.
Resisted adultery: A sign of struggle with your sexual desires; expression of strength meeting opposition in life, therefore strength to overcome difficulties.
Maurice Nicoll, in his book The New Man, points out that the biblical mentions of adultery were not only direct references to that as a real act, but also to a symbolical meaning. As a symbol adultery represented being unfaithful to the one God – whoring after other gods. Taken in general, adultery might therefore carry a similar meaning, a sense of being unfaithful in a committed relationship, whether that relationship is marital, social, work or to ones ideals.
However, being faithful to one person for some people is tortuous and so it needs to be understood that for some people it is in their nature to be polygamous.
Useful questions are:
Am I somehow cheapening a valuable experience in life?
Do I long for something that is physically or emotionally forbidden to me?
Am I not admitting the needs I have ?
Does this show an area of my life that is full of energy that I do not let flow into my everyday life?
See Dream are Virtual Reality and What do you Bring to Your Dreams.
Comments
i dreamed that the former mistress of my husband came in a nowhere and duddrnly kissed me at my left cheek.
Hi – I am stopping from answering your posts fully – but will try to give hints; sometimes long ones because I quote from masses I have already put online. Also I need to take time to update the site – dreamhawk.
It would help you to understand your dreams, if you would read – http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/questions-2/#Summing and also http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/features-found-on-site/
Nothing can replace your own ability to understand your dream. With a little effort you can do this by practicing what is described in – http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPersonOrThing or http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/getting-at-your-dreams-meaning/
Tony
It is a way of saying that love links all things together in peace. You have an inner self as well as a physical self, and your inner self is receiving love.
My dream starts already with a negative. I will be divorcing my wife. I found out she was cheating on me 6 years ago. Then I caught her cheating on me 1 year ago. We are in agreement for a clean separation. We have a son. We never fight or argue. We are completely civil about the whole ordeal. Lastnight my dream went as so, a friend of mine that I haven’t seen in 9 years comes over to my house. My wife had a crush on my friend 10 years ago. Without any words really, I went into the bedroom while they stayed in the living room. They then proceeded to have sex. After they are finished, my friend has pretty much vanished, and my wife’s body language and facial expression shows nothing has happened. I wake up out of pure anger. Now I’ve had a bad dream about my wife. Even when she cheated on me the first time. In fact, I havent really had any dreams since I was a child. I dream like once every few years now it seems. What I’m getting at is that consciousness while awake has never felt guilt. And I can already get an idea of what you are gonna say about my and her. I’m just curious as to why now? I have already more than welcomed the fact that it’s better she and I were not together. And yet I wake up with pure anger.
Hi – I am stopping from answering your posts fully – but will try to give hints; sometimes long ones because I quote from masses I have already put online. Also I need to take time to update the site – dreamhawk.
It would help you to understand your dreams, if you would read – http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/questions-2/#Summing also http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/features-found-on-site/
Nothing can replace your own ability to understand your dream. With a little effort you can do it by practicing what is described in – http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPersonOrThing
Tony
Dreams are products of a very different dimension or level of your mind. Often our conscious mind is profoundly guarded against what is going on in the other level.
However, it is worthwhile to allow the two parts of you to find some balance. Maybe it would good to act out the anger. You can release it safely by standing in the role of the angry or emotional person, and sometimes it can help to act out anger by hitting cushions or an armchair with a rolled up newspaper, tennis racquet or baseball bat. Acting it out can often lead to a real release and then you can see where it all started. You may need to do it without feelings and automatically at first, but if you keep on it will slowly become real. You will probably need to do this a number of times over a period of time to feel the results. See http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/anger-dealing-with/
I dream my husband having sex with my sister…i dream about that twice. My husband had been cheating on me before we are married.
Hi – I am stopping from answering your posts fully – but will try to give hints; sometimes long ones because I quote from masses I have already put online. Also I need to take time to update the site – dreamhawk.
It would help you to understand your dreams, if you would read – http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/questions-2/#Summing also http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/features-found-on-site/
Nothing can replace your own ability to understand your dream. With a little effort you can do it by practicing what is described in – http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPersonOrThing
Tony
Someone can only cheat on you if you take seriously the ridiculous promise we make in being married to say, “Will you love her, comfort her, honour and protect her, and, forsaking all others, be faithful to her as long as you both shall live?”
We all have the insight into the big argument between authorities over whether mankind, womankind, are basically a monogamous or a polygamous creature. It seemed to me the answer is so obvious it can be observed everywhere about us, and such arguments are based only on attempts to support theories. The observable fact is that human kind are neither monogamous or polygamous. They are obviously both. They have a strong urge toward a long relationship with one person, while at the same time capable of many other relationships. When either extreme of behaviour is enforced by society or oneself, neurosis and pain often arise.
So if your husband is actually polygamous, and not simply your anxiety about it causing your dreams, make up your mind what you want to do.
Relationships, whether heterosexual or homosexual, fail, even with the starting point of intense love. Figures differ from fifty percent failure in the US, to one in three in the UK. Hetro or homo are about the same. Statistics show there is a huge decline in marriage, with a swing to living together without the ceremony. Also there is a massive increase in adults without a partner. It has risen from six point five to thirty percent since 1960.
To avoid recognising that the social and personal climate surrounding marriage in our own times has changed is to invite heartache and feelings of failure. Best to recognise that a huge percentage of marriages and partnerships founder, and being human you face that possibility too. With that in mind you can start your partnership with understanding and planning in place to meet and deal with difficulties as and if they arise.
Ive had a dream of having sex with my brother in law twice now. Both times we had sex it was hot and like a movie of a wild affair “hookup”. What does this mean? I feel ashamed like it happened when that never would.
Hi – I must take time to upgrade the dream dictionary, so must halt from answering your posts – I started revising the dictionary in 2006, and haven’t neared the end yet. I believe someone else may start giving interpretations.
So, for a while I urge you to read http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/i-am-no-longer-interpreting-dreams/ – It describes ways that can help you. And often it would help too if you looked at http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/questions-2/#Summing
Tony
Never feel ashamed of your dream life. People are very confused about the difference between their waking life and their dream life. They believe that what they dream is the same as what they meet in waking life. In other words, we take as a truth that what is important outwardly is as important in our dreams. So you are as upset by a dream as if it had actually happened in waking life. Such mistakes make us feel things that are ridiculous. This happens with the morals we live by, which may be necessary in waking life, but we try to make them fit to our much bigger and freer dream/inner life, and that causes conflict because the two worlds are completely different. So in dreams about sex we do not have to live by the same small moral world often necessary in waking life. In dreams we experiment emotionally and sexually, so dreams often stand in place of actual experience. In doing so we expand our mental and emotional life without any danger or consequences. Through dreams we may experiment with new experience or practice things we have not yet done externally.
Hey I had a dream about my guy friend with benefits he way laying I the bed with his boxers on and she was with her bra and panties on. Once I walked into the room they both jumped up and he come saying nothing happen but she say we only done it twice. Later after the commotion in the dream he come apologizing to me saying am the only girl he’s sleeping with and trying to make up. What is the definition of this dream.
Hi – I must take time to upgrade the dream dictionary, so must halt from answering your posts – I started revising it in 2006, and haven’t neared the end yet. I believe someone else may start giving interpretations.
So, for a while I urge you to read http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/i-am-no-longer-interpreting-dreams/ – It describes ways that can help you.
Tony
Such dreams are created out of your own mixed up feelings about love, jealousy, possessiveness and criticism. In fact all the human feelings that lead to pain and even murder.
So what I am trying to learn, what I am perhaps learning, is to acknowledge that I do not love any one single person to the exclusion of anyone else.
In one sense this is easy. In a certain way I see that life is what we make it or what we wish to make it. I see that social morals are largely historical things that came about through certain circumstances in the past. Nevertheless, it is also obvious that those morals were based on very hard lessons. Sexual disease is still prevalent. I do not wish to be party to carrying an infection from one woman to another. I would sooner refrain from sexual intercourse.
So what I am not sitting easy with is our own tribal laws that still basically say we must relate only to one woman and one-man. To me, love is not like that. It hasn’t got those narrow boundaries. See http://dreamhawk.com/relationship-sex/beware-of-love/
I had a dream my for leas in the kitchen makes over the stove back to me and another guy was at the table but she was named and he just started giving her oral sex from the back while she cooked ,then he left out the house fast I said hey dude wait and I said Baby what u doing she replied annoyed with What! Then I woke up
Hi – I am sorry to suddenly stop replying to dreams like this, but I must upgrade the dream dictionary – I started the revising in 2006, and haven’t got near the end yet.
So for a while I urge you to read http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/i-am-no-longer-interpreting-dreams/
Also here are so ways you can find your dreams meaning – http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/questions-2/#Summing – http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/getting-at-your-dreams-meaning/ or http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson
Tony
You are probably deeply uncertain about your own value and doubt whether you are lovable. These feelings may hide painful dependence upon the loved person. This dependence may be based upon childhood needs that were never met, or were betrayed. This can of course be an intuition, but be careful in deciding which.
I had a very disturbing dream about catching my ex-husband in bed with another man. It was like I had a video cam of his whole house and I saw him going from room to room preparing for a date. Dinner, candles the whole bit. Then in the bed room I find him engaged with another man. What does all this mean.
Please see http://dreamhawk.com/approaches-to-being/i-am-no-longer-interpreting-dreams/
But other dream experts might reply.
I had a dream that my husband (who I have been separated from since 02/2015 and who also has a girlfriend) and his father (my father in law) were at my grandparents house (the home I grew up in) in her bed sleeping I came into the house and was looking for my husband. I did not notice at first that he was in the bed with his Father till I doubled back and saw him. He then pulled me into the bed into the middle of them. This Dad was all over the place like a child sleeping wildly. My husband pulled me closer to him and we laid there. Then the next scene I see him at the door looking out and he tells me to get rid of them. I look out and see his girlfriend and her Sister or another female come into the house. I put my arm up and say to them “you heard him… now go”. They look at him who is very upset and then at me and say “oh really”? I say “yes”. My father in law then walks out the room and she (the girlfriend) goes to greet him and he puts out his hand for her to shake. Next scene they are leaving out of the driveway and then my husband goes out quickly and comes back in with a beautiful Baby girl. I ask him can I hold her and he gives her to me. I look at her and she looks at me and then I wake up.
I keep having dreams of myan chossing another women over me… not sure what it means..
Dear Christine – Unfortunately you do not express how you feel in your dream when your husband chooses another woman.
Exploring the thoughts and feelings of your own dream figure may help you understand yourself better; http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/acting-on-your-dream/#BeingPerson
In general dreams recur because there are ways the dreamer habitually responds to their internal or external world. Because their attitude or response is unchanging, the dream that reflects it remains the same. It is noticeable in those who explore their dreams using such techniques as described under http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/practical-techniques-for-understanding-your-dreams/ that recurring themes disappear or change because the attitudes or habitual anxieties that gave rise to them have been met or transformed.
See also http://dreamhawk.com/relationship-sex/ages-of-love-2/ and http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/sex-and-identity/
Anna 🙂
For the past couple of months I have had dreams about my husband’s brother kissing me && also having sex with me… But in every dream my husband is dead or missing… It never feels wrong in my dreams though… I always feel amazing with a butterfly feeling in my tummy while dreaming.. I do not know what to make of it, my brother in law is a good looking guy but i do not see him in that manner. I am deeply && maddly in love with my husband. It feels wrong to dream of this. What can it mean? We live with his brother, i can not keep dreaming this.
Dear Stephanie – Because you are the creator of your dream, it will be helpful to explore it for yourself as well, so that you can get a deeper feeling understanding of your own creation; http://dreamhawk.com/dream-dictionary/practical-techniques-for-understanding-your-dreams/
I can understand that you feel uncomfortable with these dreams and yet I believe that it is helpful to enjoy uniting with your brother in law the way you do.
As you could read in this entry on “adultery”;
It is also a way of opening a door to new influences, a new direction in life that will in some way change you, flow back to you with its own needs, light and shadows.
While you would not “dream of” having sex with your brother in law in your waking life, in your dream life kissing and having sex with him can have a totally different meaning.
You wrote that in every dream your husband is dead or missing, which I see as a symbol that whatever you receive/share/exchange on a deeper level with your brother in law is not part of the relationship with your husband (yet).
Your inner male – http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/archetype-of-the-animus-jungs-view-of-the-male-in-the-female/ – is a synthesis of all your male contacts and perhaps you can explore what you perceive as attractive in your brother in law and which traits/aspects you would like to integrate in your inner world too.
See also http://dreamhawk.com/dream-encyclopedia/integration-meeting-oneself/
Kissing and having sex can symbolise this integration (too); in a sense, it is always a merging with the person (or creature) who is the dream character. Because we are always inside of ourselves male and female and also everything we dream about, it may therefore show merging more fully with these other sides of you.
Anna 🙂
My husband has been chrating on me i found a pone number and addtess i told my sister i seen the bitch she told me she had sex with my husband guess what am not divotce him god will handle him.
Last night I had a dream where me and my girlfriend were waiting in our room then my sister-in-law walks in then her and my girlfriend start talking she then tells me to pull it out so I did and my sister in law hop on my and we had a threesome that’s all I can remember
I have frequent dreams about my boyfriend who I live with, who is also the first true relationship I’ve ever had, cheating or just plain choosing another woman over me. I know these are founded by flirtation and sexting I’ve caught that we’ve been working through. I had one last night that was very different by putting another girl in my place (living with him happily with a cat and everything) and I learned in the course of the dream that I was the mistress. So I asked him to choose me or the other girl, who was incredibly nice and normal until the end of the dream…and he chose that other girl. I was heartbroken and ended things with him but the rest of the dream consisted of me refusing to get back together until he was single. But he wouldn’t break up with that other girl and and she eventually got jealous that he kept trying to win me back and tried to frame me for a crime before the dream ended. I figured this probably has a lot to do with how he was kind of “with” someone else (they had never met in person) when we got together and I didn’t figure it out until he wouldn’t even add me on Facebook for months because he I guess wanted to have his cake and eat it too. Would I be right in assuming that I’m still uncomfortable with all of that and probably very insecure that he could have a whole other relationship and I wouldn’t know until it is too late?
Hi,
My partner sometimes dreams that he is approached by another woman for sex but he always turns her down. To him this is a good thing as he’s remaining faithful. What do you think though?
Thanks,
Avril
I had a dream that both me and my husband we’re shot. The following night I dreamt that my husband cheated on me with my sister. I know my sister would never do that, but my husband has had an affair before. Not sure what to think.
I want to know what is the meaning of my dream. in my dream, I am in place where my brother in law working and she has a gf there.. but i did not see them sex. I just only recognized that they have relationship coz this girl keep on talking to my brother in law and calling him honey.. which my sister and my brother in law called to each other.. when I notice it.. i frankly talk to the girl and pushing her to tell the truth to me.. coz i am really bother.. I dont want my sister get hurt because of this people. and the girl say the truth and also my brother in law.. i said to them.. they need to stop their relationship before my sister get to know and she will get hurt.. but if they will not stop it..I will tell it to her… and my brother in law and the mistress decided to stop it on that day.. after that i seen my self in air plain back to my own home.. where my sister and my family waiting… they are happy to see me.. but my brother in law ,, not happy to see me… Can you tell me about my dreams…